Monday
Aug012016
Peter Parker Would NOT Be Proud
August 1, 2016 ♫ Spider-Man, Spider-Man ♪
;)
Does whatever a spider can!
;)
Spins a web
Any size!
;)
Catches thieves
Between his thighs
LOOK OUT!
;)
♫ Here comes the Spider-Maaaan!
Is he strong? Listen, Bud
;)
Spider-Man is a total stud
He can float, he can fly!
;)
Just look into
his soulful eyes
;)
OH YEAH
;)
♫ That's totally Spider-Maaaaaan
;)
We swear it's Spider-Maaaaaan
What do you mean you want your money back look it says "Spider-Maaaaaan."
;)
Here's comes the Spider-MAAAAAAAN!
[jazz hands!]
Thanks to Kayte K., Amanda N., Liz D., Elisabeth T., Shoddyan, Sarah, Amanda S., Daniel & Kat, Anony M., & Carissa M. for finding the best wrecks on the Web.
*****
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Reader Comments (30)
Spiderman is 54 years old. Do you think it's easy putting on those damn tights every day? He's doing the best he can. He's cut out snacks, he's given up beer, he exercises every day...It's just become impossible.
I suppose...
Some of those Spider Men (Spider Mans?) look very good. They have to be made out of fondant is why.
All that yummy yummy icing... especially on that second, third, and last one... YUM! 8-d
I am sitting at my desk trying so hard not to lose it laughing it's hard to type. As a woman of size myself, I find it refreshing to see a superhero with a beer gut and moobs so big the real super in his hero is the spandex suit. And his web-slinger region--bwahahahaha! What really makes it bust-a-gut (Eh? Eh!) funny is the hands behind the head pose. Hey bebeh indeed.
That third cake is a straight-up W...T... F...
I am completely sympatico with @AngelaS! Everything she said, I ditto big time!
At first cake #1 was cracking me up -- that disembodied head!! Then I got to Nate's cake and silent laughed here at my desk til tears ran down my face!
The last one! They didn't even try. "Well, we got some of the colors right. Just put "Spider man" on there. Someone will buy it."
Most of the others are awful and display ineptitude. This one is just disappointing.
( I,too, like the bulked up Spidey. Finally, a superhero that looks like me in a leotard and tights.)
The third Spidey's spidey senses are realllly tingling.
For the longest time - never having seen any of the movies - I thought Spiderman was making the ASL sign for "I love you" and couldn't figure out what that had to do with the price of eggs.
And who else sand that entire post? C'mon you know you did! Well I did and now my coworkers think I am nuts.
SuBee, you got it right! Who knew that's where he kept the web shooter.
That first one just shows that even super heroes get colds. He can't help what shape the snot is that comes out of his nose (or any of the fluids from anywhere, apparently).
Hahahahahaha!!!! I can't stop laughing😆😆😆😆😆
Can't lie. #5 cracked me up. I laughed out loud and figured it was some kind of inside joke. Until I realized it was for a 10 year old boy. Are they trying to help Nate be happy with his body image? I don't think its working.
But I think the last one is my favorite. I feel such pity for this poor baker who must have been locked in a box since infancy, never enjoying a comic book. Or TV. Or a movie. Or even a spider, for that matter (white spiders?)???
Poor Spidey, (Cake 3) How would YOU like it if every time you peed, the web you spun attached you to the urinal/toilet. Damn Webs! What a nuisance. I feel for ya Spidey.
It took me ages to get past Nate's cake, because I busted out laughing and had to catch my breath before I could go on.
So cake number 3... Is that supposed to indicate he's "equipped" to shoot two webs simultaneously from between his thighs? I don't remember that from the comic strip, but it could explain why MJ stuck around so long.
#5 is actually “a thing.” Not a half-bad cake rendition, either. 😀
http://www.socomic.gr/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/fat-spiderman-dancing.gif
Katie -- the good looking Spideys are made of plastic, the "flotsam" that is supposed to help decorators avoid making wrecks. Evidently that doesn't always work.
Nate's cake would be a funny joke if Nate were middle-aged. But apparently he's 10. Let's hope he's a leap-year baby and is therefore actually 40 in human years, making this once again a good joke.
Who knew just getting INTO the suit was a superpower...the things I learn here...
Cake #4 just makes me think Spidey on a water slide. ^_^
Cake #1 - Was this cake for Doc OcK or Green Goblin ala- Godfather style??
Cake #2 - let this be a lesson to you Christian, too many CC Cake will lead to birth defects.
Cake #3 - !!!!! I just can't!!! Well ok I can. It is the closest to being the anatomically correct locations for Spidey's spinnerets but I just never expected to see it on a cake!!
Cake #4 - The Spidey Splat- That's all that's left of spiders who enter my kitchen too!
Cake #5 - Let's just pause a moment to reflect on better days....
.
.
.
.
.
.
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Cake #6 - Is Spidey trying to Levitate or plank??? Also- just how did he manage to get web on the side but not the top?? (kind of like how my kids can get laundry everywhere but the hamper??)
Cake # 7-9 - The wreckorator should have never been allowed anywhere near a piping bag!! in fact they should be bared from entering a bakery period.
Cake #10 - This Poor Decorator!!! She suffered from such a severe case of arachnophobia that she wasn't even able to decorate the cake!!! 12 legs...Frosting everywhere 'cause she's shaking so bad....all she can manage is a little "spider man' on the side! Lets hope the baker at least did a good job!
Some things just should not be seen.....
#1: Spider head, spider head,
#2: Squashed all flat 'til he should be dead,
#3: Did the splits, lost a shin,
#4: What's that blue thing he's lounging in?
What the...? I asked for Spiderman...
#5: Is he strong? No, just fat,
He'll sit on you and squash you flat,
#6: Can he swing on a rope,
Did I ask for Tome Cruise, then? Nope,
I SAID, I want the Spiderman...
#7 Not a cupcake mess!
#8 Or a spray job gone wrong,
#9 Upside-downy eyes, like a big red Cylon,
#10 Spiderman, Spiderman,
Say it's Spidey because you can,
Just for fun, on the top,
Put a face-hugger... AAAAAARGH! JUST STOP
RIGHT THERE!
I ordered Spiderman cake,
I paid for Spiderman cake,
Give me a Spidermaaaaaan! *sob*
Lol!! The webbing between his legs has me laughing so hard. Plus all the cakes that poor Spidey was supposed to be on only looked like he lost his eyes in a tragic event. Scary.
Many winners today. The usual cast of characters. Special kudos to dr handle!
Nate's cake is still funny at ANY age, kayk. Who says kids don't deserve to have wrecks same as anybody else.
I can't hear the Spiderman theme song (or apparently read a riff on it) without thinking of the British sitcom Coupling. If you've never seen it, do yourself a favor and watch.
Sadly, this link doesn't have the whole thing, but it will give you an idea: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6w6-bgi5AuA
The "fat" spider man is an internet joke, so probably his parents either found it online and found it funny or they're in on the joke. Doesn't make it any less crazy to put on a 1 yr old's cake though :D