Monday
Apr272015
Wedding Wrecks, Fangirl Edition
April 27, 2015 Imani wanted this cake for her wedding, only with bright lime green flowers instead of pink:
;)
She got this:
;)
Yeeeah.
And Meredith asked for this design with little pumpkins instead of apples:
;)
... but she got this:
;)
Preach.
And finally, as a baker herself, Zoey decided to keep her wedding cake design SUPER simple to avoid potential wreckage:
;)
No piping required! Just plain frosted tiers and colored sugar crystals!
Say it with me, now:
What could possibly go wrong?
;)
Oooh, Sherlock, you so bad.
Thanks to Imani R., Meredith R., & Zoey K., who want to know if I seriously just turned this post into a SuperWhoLock love fest. And the answer is yes, YES I DID.
*****
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Reader Comments (51)
That second cake looks like soggy graham crackers.
SuperWhoLock!!!! I'm sick with a bad cold and that still has me smiling from ear to ear. Thank you!
Maybe I've seen too many horrible cakes here, but that first one doesn't seem completely wrecky to me.
SuperWhoLock 4 lyfe! Love it.
That second wreck looks diseased. Ground zero for the zombie virus?
Any of these is guaranteed to make a bride cry...or throw things...or both....
To the sad guy in the rain:
Mack Acher's parked, and melting in the dark,
All the puke-green icing flowing doooown...!
Someone left the wreck out in the rain,
And I don't think I can save it
'Cause I tried to microwave it,
And I'll never have that microwave again...
Oh, wow! =^0.o^=
:/
@CatTrampoline, I didn't even notice the soggy grahams until you pointed it out, as I was too distracted by the rotten tomatoes plopped on there.
Not sorry we just went with a sheet cake!
SuperWhoLock!! I'm swooning!
Why on earth didn't Zoey make her own cake? (I did.) And is that Jesus on top of her cake?
This is a crappy Monday, but this SuperWhoLock post made me smile (and almost choke on my salad at my desk), so thank you!
RE: Cake #3 (aka Zoey's cake):
The theme of my daughter's sweet sixteen was "Sugar? You Want Sugar? I'll Give You Some Sugar...," and we were actually considering that cake. Luckily, Amy (a budding decorator and ardent Cake Wrecks fan) pointed out that the cake was deceptively simple and that a decorator had to be really good to get the fondant that smooth and the sugar so tastefully placed. As a result, she had a beautiful unwrecked birthday cake (the fondant was perfect.) Sorry Zoey.
I'm always surprised at how often an elegant "what they requested" cake gets a topper plopped on by the "what they got" wreckerator. And they are always, always ugly, kitschy or inept attempts at humor. An near miss can be turned into a full-blown wreck by the addition of a bride dragging a groom to the altar.
@CatTrampoline, thanks. Before I read your comment, I thought wreck #2 looked like regularly spaced pustules about to burst. Now all I can see is regularly spaced pustules about to burst through soggy graham crackers.
SuperWhoLock FTW! Jen, you are a constant delight.
That first cake honestly didn't look disastrous, especially as compared to the others. Good gravy! How did that second one go so badly? Aside from the pumpkins, ALL the baker had to do was frost it a smooth dark chocolate brown and carefully place those little gold balls into the surface. Why on earth did they even do what they did?
That very first what she wanted cake reminds me of Eliza Doolittle's hat in My Fair Lady when she goes to the race track. So in reply to the what she got cake, I'd have told the baker to "Move your bloomin' caaaaaaake!"
That next very sad what she got cake just makes me want to go lay down, pull the covers over my head and take a nap. Or sit and look out a window at the rain and listen to melancholy music.
That last one makes me want to say, "Why didn't Zoey just make her own cake?"
Yes, thank you for SuperWhoLock! I could seriously watch that Dean gif all day, it cracks me up so bad. And as much as I feel bad for the brides who receive these wrecks, the wedding missed marks are my absolute favorite posts.
Nothing like Cake Wrecks with a nice dose of geekery to perk up a rainy Monday. Thanks Jen! :D
I was very excited when I saw the SuperWhoLock gifs! I should've known that in this community I would not be the only one thrilled with your choice of reaction photos. Not that the post itself was bad, but SuperWhoLock definitely made my day.
The first one would have been okay had that been what she'd asked for. But it's really off. What a disaster!
"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."
Superwholock... i love you jen even more!
Is that FELT on the first cake? Felt cut with pinking shears? I can't tell if those are felt fuzzies sticking to the fondant, or if it's just a blurry photo. As for poor Zoey, I would guess she didn't make her own cake because she was the bride, and had a few other things going on at the time. You think she would have known who to turn to for her wedding cake though. These photos make me glad we skipped a wedding cake, and served cookies, instead.
If the dimensions were correct, the Eliza Doolittle cake wouldn't have been bad...the others, though? They're a delightful combination of technical ineptness, a poor eye for replicating design, and CAKE TOPPERS. (I'm getting to the point where I loathe cake toppers.)
Isn't the first cake available in a Craftsy class? As in complete instructions and templates all available for less than $30? /sigh
Don't customers browse through portfolios of bakers' previous creations before contracting for an important and expensive cake? I Just. Don't. Understand.
I imagine Zoey thought the sugar crystal cake was either beyond her ability, OR she didn't want to take the time to make her own cake, but geez...choose wisely, Grasshoppers!
Now I want a cake of David Tennant and Benedict Cumberbatch riding a unicorn.
@sandy that first cake actually WAS inspired by Audrey Hepburn's character in My Fair Lady! I am a cake designer and took Eva Salazar's class on Craftsy where she gives a full tutorial on how to make that exact cake! Its actually a very easy design that even a beginner could complete- That cake decorator clearly did not take the class. Anyway, Eva shows a picture of Audrey in hat and dress and said it was her inspiration.
Oh,sorry, you said what? You lost me at David Tennant...
After all this time. No one has learned a thing. *sigh* Oh well, wreck on.
The second one is mine and they were supposed to be apples still, just red instead of green.
I believe my mom paid the final payment on the cake the morning of the wedding which was the requirement. So we paid for it before we ever saw it. And yes, it was a "professional bakery" that was recommended and not even the cheapest in town.
Not surprisingly, she went out of business. "Creations by Marcia" made quite the creation...
These expectations VS reality posts are my favorite!
I'm always baffled as to how brides who're fans of Cake Wrecks end up with wrecks themselves. I don't even want to get married and if there's one part of the wedding I could organise it would be the cake thanks to this blog. Aren't the golden rules: always ask to see the portfolio, get a recommendation from someone, and you get what you pay for? In any case, I'm glad people keep ignoring the rules because otherwise we'd be bereft of wrecks.
What's with the guy in the polyester camel suit from 1978?
At least Zoe's cake demonstrates how crystals grow. What it lacks in style and elegance, it makes up for as an educational resource.
If it wasn't for my fandom 15yo I wouldn't have gotten or loved today's SuperWhoLock references. However, after having been present for many a fangirl meltdown I love and appreciate all her fangirl faves. The cakes on the other hand, not so much.
Great taste in .gif reactions too hahaha
I already loved this blog because I'm a cake decorator, but I am also a HUGE geek! And now have 3 new reasons to love this blog (Dean Winchester, the Doctor, and Sherlock) <3 <3 <3
The cakes are hilarious, but the Doctor standing in the rain gif was my favorite thing about this article <3
The first cake wasn't horrible. The one with supposed pumpkins made me laugh hysterically and feel horrid for the bride all at once. Wow.
Honestly, that first one isn't so far off the mark. I studied the inspiration cake, imagined everything from droopy melting petals to gigantic petals, and when I finally scrolled down, I had to wonder, "Did I miss the wreck?"
SuperWhoLock! Jen, I love you so much! Possibly even more than I love Benedict Cumberbatch, cos you come with hilarious cakes. My cousin is getting married soon, I'm going to torment her with these weapons of cake destruction!
I have to admit that my reaction to the first "What they got" cake was exactly like the gif reaction... Which was a little weird, but also funny!
SuperWhoLock!!! =)
I was thinking those were pears, not apples. Not really the point. The point is David Tennant & Benedict Cumberbatch
Hi,
I'm about to choose a three-tier wedding cake to replicate for my practical final exam in my "Advanced Patisserie and Display Cake" class, so I thought I'd come here to see what I should avoid selecting. However all this did was give me a much needed break in my search and a lot of laughs. I was particularly fond of the attempt at a ruffle cake in another group of wedding cakes that you have.
I am waiting for you to depict some of the extremely strange cakes where the layers are totally draped...I don't mean graceful swags, I mean like a blanket put over each layer or over the three layers all together. I saw the pictures of them and couldn't believe they weren't cake wrecks.
Thanks much for the fun!
The first one is probably the most beautiful cake I have ever laid eyes on
I kinda liked the first wreck. Maybe not for a wedding cake that I was paying for, but just as a general cake it's still kinda pretty. Not as pretty as Dean though... Man he's beautiful... (After several months I have finally watched all 10 seasons).
I do love the wedding wrecks!
I like this sight but you are better off not attempting the gifs I usually LMAO on this blog however I didn't this time you are funnier without the gifs ironically I love gifs just not here they didn't even go with the pics just stay how you were it is a much better blog with just you and John!
One can 'hedge the bets' in your favor by looking through the portfolio of cakes the baker has actually done (magazine photos don't count) and selecting something similar. We got recommendations and they were all the same person, so I went to see her and she had BEAUTIFUL cakes and was booked a year in advance (all good signs.) I found the exact cake I wanted in her portfolio from another wedding; just had her change the white to ivory and add a few sugar flowers. It was beautiful and no stress. Yes, she cost a bit more, but it was well worth it.
At least Jesus was watching over the last cake.