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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Thursday
Aug042011

Available Exclusively at the Geiger Counter!

When it comes to powerfully good cake, the choice is (nu)clear:

And here's some fuel for thought: this wasn't a special order. It was just out in the display case, on the off chance someone was having a nuclear power plant themed occasion worth celebrating.

HOW WELL THEY KNOW ME.

Thanks to Clare M. for the rad wreckporting.

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Reader Comments (117)

What if they're... elephant trunks? Like... a mom and baby--

wait. then they would be creepy disembodied elephant trunks. on cake.

CAKE-- Y U BE SO WRECKY!?

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAna V.

I think it resembles two bottles of chocolate milk in love.

Jackie

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterThe Pink Drink Ladies

Common misconception: Those are simply cooling towers. They could be attached to any form of power generation, not just nuclear.

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterElizabeth

Shouldn't the hearts be giant and mutated? That would make the cake so much cooler! IMHO

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDonna

Wow and I thought they were supposed to be volcanoes erupting hearts...seismologists in love? It's a pretty enough cake but definitely a bizarre theme...

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterGrnEyes

File this under Most Brilliant Post titles Ever!

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterRoses

This cake doesn't even make sense, certainly they weren't actually going to nuclear reactors, but what? What else could they of been trying for? It's like telling me I can't have a lighter on the plane but allowing me to bring matches. My head hurts now.

wv: ingult

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTina,

I was thinking they were beakers and it was some kind of chemistry / love thing.

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSeanpt

Its a loooove factory! =p

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterApril Lewie

The first thing I thought of was nuclear reactors, also.

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMarie

I live 9 3/4 miles from Indian Point power plant in NY. I can't imagine a better way to celebrate our impending doom when the emergency sirens go off.
As we sit on the Taconic Parkway with the other 3 million evacuees, we'll have something to do: Pass around the cake!
Sadly, those who live a quarter mile down the road, won't get evacuated-No cake for them.

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

Clearly, this is two sea anemones (arms retracted) spawning.

WV--stagnati A Mafia family that hasn't come up with any new crime ventures lately, OR the gelato flavor you *really* don't want!

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMonique in TX

Our nearby coal-burning plant has cooling towers like a nuke plant. But no nukes.
So maybe it's for power plant workers? Like Homer?

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered Commenternewbuffalomom

Unless those are clam necks on the cakes, it isn't just love for nuclear power there; it's a meltdown, or at least a leak.
Stuff isn't supposed to be coming out of the top of those cooling towers.

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterGary

mesas and smoke signals?
-kala

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDr K

...actually, this is kind of cool. I'd buy/eat this.

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJulie C

It's a volcano of love.

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermimi

Could also be traditional pottery kilns or as other wreckporter has said ordinary power station,
Still a weird choice for cake!

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterdiddleymaz

I'm in the "what is it really" camp. Loving the pun though. You (nu)clear on that? ;)

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterangieruns.com

WTF was that SUPPOSED to be??? D:

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

it's The Power of Love!
Now Huey Lewis will be in my head the rest of the day.

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterChristina

Maybe they're smokestacks? To celebrate the ever-popular "I <3 Global Warming and Pollution!" Week. I think this was their inspiration; http://blogs.reuters.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/08/rtr1kqtc.jpg

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterGennyDiggory

Looks like the baker was fission for compliments. Why don't we just salute (C)hernobyl effort.

WV: eversa -- This is the most random cake I eversa.

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

Volcanos spewing lava (lova) hearts?

Maybe swollen smokestacks from an ocean liner (Love Boat)?

Maybe it's pottery… Ghost comes to mind. :-)

DB

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

@SuBee:
We're going to need a bigger cake.

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

This cake reminded me of something I'd seen once... had to do some hunting but I found it:

http://wearscience.com/design/hugger/

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKat

I see oddly-shaped volcanos erupting with love. Wait...that came out wrong. 0_O

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKristen

Sharyn, I salute you!

WV: tumrquet- a device used to quell bleeding of the abdomen.

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Love potions, perhaps???

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

So cute. I wonder if its yellow cake.

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

maybe there's a plant nearby and coworkers tend to fall in love there? maybe it's supposed to be bottlenecks for people who like to drink?

Thanks, Christina. Now _I_ have Huey Lewey in my head all day!

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

This cake is a reproduction of a petroglyph allegedly found inside an Anasazi dwelling. The two items pictured are unfinished clay pots (note the typical coiling not yet smoothed out), hastily prepared as the tribe was getting ready to disappear. The hearts are not emanating from the pots, but are falling into the pots – symbolizing the hearts and souls of the tribe members being gathered within their culture, to be kept safe for all time. The larger vessel stands for the adults and the smaller, the children. You’ll note that there are more child hearts than adult ones, for, as is typical in many societies, the children represent the hope for the future. While the sky is blue (blue skies, nothing but blue skies….), a clear indication of the optimism that tribe had lived under for so long, the two white spots near the left of the adult pot may signify the “hole in the future” (see Richie Havens song of same name), a foreboding sign, and, ultimately the cause for the symbolic gathering of the tribe and its civilization. Others have speculated that the white spots represent the approaching “white man”, and the picture denotes the tribe’s attempt to save its culture from that influence. The cake itself (note the white coils, also unfinished) repeats the theme of the unfinished pots. Where did this cake go? That, too, remains a mystery.

wv-moortati: what you need when you don't have enough tati...

@Sharyn: love the puns!

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermel

Anon @ 11:29,

Awesome. Just awesome. I can't believe I didn't think of it.

john

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterjohn (the hubby of Jen)

Well, it's a pretty cake, all things considered. Maybe they're supposed to be fancy coffee mugs or something.... haha

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTaryn

Love Canal celebration...
mocking

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Wow, Mel, you have a lot of time on your hands. Good thing, too. ;)

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterdeckardcanine

Can you say Love Canal?

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermizdarlin

I don't suppose the submitter gave you a location? If it's from West Virginia, it would sort of make sense. Sort of.

I can totally see someone living by Dupont or Carbide doing a cake like this. I've got a friend whose dad works there, she'd love this as a fathers day cake! Its like baby and daddy cooling towers.

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

But this is perfect for The Simpsons themed party I'm throwing! D'oh!

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAusmerican Housewife

I vote that they're actually http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bottle_oven" rel="nofollow">Bottle kilns. Was this cake sighted in the North Staffordshire (Potteries) region?

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJess

Dear Mel,
I always learn so much from you. Would you be willing to teach my daughter's world history class. Her teacher knows nothing. NOTHING!

And while I'm at it: Yellow Cake! Hysterical.

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

Seconding the beaker theory. There's a game called Rhythm Heaven where scientists make love (potions) in beakers in a lab, complete with wafting hearts.

...at least, I'm choosing to believe those are beakers.

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterEjia

It's a Tube Worm Valentine. Because coelenterates need love, too.

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I was thinking they were wasp nests but with hearts instead of wasps coming out of them. But, isn't the opening usually on the bottom or in the middle of the nest?
Still doesn't make any sense or make me see the need for a cake with that on top.

wv "andefe" Of course she got the cake wrong. Our decorator is blind andefe.

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I'd buy it, if only for the conversation at the party!

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterChristine

are those hearts coming out of it??? I am sooo confused!!!

wv: I wonder if the cake tastes 'mente'

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterNo Cake Fo' You!!!

Clearly, they're the tops of coke bottles. Diet Coke is doing a program called "Heart Truth" that raises awareness for women's heart health. See: http://www.dietcoke.com/hearttruth/the_program.jsp

Not the best rendering of it, but copyright issues may have prevented the baker from putting the actual Diet Coke logo.

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAlyssa

I would eat the hell out of that cake. The nuclear war, hell out of it.

I love this thing. I wish more bakers were this creative.

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSarahG

Thought you might like this cake-related news story.

http://www.ksl.com/?nid=960&sid=16656903

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterStefani

I think this is actually a really cool cake, and if I saw it in the store I would buy it! I'm not sure why they made it though. There probably aren't many celebrations that involve cooling towers of love.

August 4, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJen

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