A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.
Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)
March 24, 2009 It's your birthday! Have a ball!
No, seriously. Have a ball:
"Look at all the extra care the baker took in crafting this lovely...round...spherical...ball-like thing for your birthday! That random capitalization and uncrossed 't' really add to the post-modernistic feel, too, don't you think?
"Plus, the pink dots add [jazz hands] pizazz!"
Angie C, you spin me right 'round.
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Reader Comments (71)
What is that? What is it sitting in inside the box? Could there be any more ashtrays on that table?
Yikes.
How do you cut it? Hmmmm...
Not to mention the full ashtray and pack of smokes really class it up.
What was this supposed to be?
What is is sitting on??? Is it a white towel????
I want the "center of the earth" slice!!!
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DB
Oh, Lordy, I am picturing the jazz hands coming out of the sides of this cake (with really long skinny fingers)!!!
Tracy O
Did they get their money back? I can't imagine getting something that looked like that, and actually agreeing to pay for it. Catastrophe!!
What's up with the tissue paper or stuff in the box with the cake? And is that really a professional cake?!?
Your birlhday is not usually celebrated with cake... at least where I come from.
i don't think they're pink dots. I think they're pink mentos. Which makes my stomach turn considering that taste combo. Buttercream icing + strawberry mentos...yuck.
I see plenty of ashtrays and some cigarettes....but perhaps the person who ordered the cake smoked too much of something else and specifically told them "Don't capitalize the B on birthday and don't cross the t".
Okay...probably not, but I tried.
I think the cigarettes and ashtrays laying around speak volumes....nuff said.
why did they have to rip the box top off I wonder??? I guess maybe they were REALLY excited...
It looks a bit like a cake that started out as a single breast, but last minute the customer called frantically screeching "stop the breasts!" at the very last second before anatomical details were added. Someone clearly missed the class on cake basics. Trim the peaks, flip over the top layer cake for a lovely, even finish and level writing surface. But boob shaped cakes are just so much more entertaining right?
I was thinking that all the ashtrays and the cigarettes added a nice backdrop for the cake. AND...it's a good thing it's in a box...the frosting would have slid into those ashes. EWWW!
Oh Magic,inexplicable ball 'o cake from the land of Walmartamier or disgruntledgrocerystorebaker-shire please I have but three questions for you:
1. Why are you here? Did someone summon your Magnificent presence or where you mearly called into service by mistake?
2. Would you think me less than a lady if I was to try to fit your entire glorious, squishy, cakeiness into my mouth at once? While you may be the size of my entire head, this only tempts me more.
3. Can we do that now?
I especially love how the lid of the cake box is torn off, like they couldn't get to that cake soon enough!!!
Looks like the Wilton Giant Cupcake pan, which the decorator couldn't figure out how to write on. It also doesn't fit in a standard cake box, since it's too tall. It's also rather narrow around the base.
Flumoxed.
Angie (from over at www.HalfAssedKitchen.com)
I'm a bit grossed out thinking of the ashes in that ashtray getting on the cake. Having said that...have you ever seen someone go pick up a cake from the baker's display case and NOT have said baker write anything on it? Maybe they think, "hey, I can do it with a tube of store bought gel all by myself." But, that doesn't really make any sense here because this cake is obviously some sort of special order...soooo that means that the skillful baker who cracked this one out, also showed off their handwriting skillz, in black. Yeah, that's about right.
Wreck ball. White tissue paper. Torn pink cardboard. Is that a shoe box? I want to see a receipt.
Did someone drop the ball on this design? Get it? LOL
~Amy B
Today is my birthday!
Ooh, ooh, can I lick the frosting off all the tissue paper stuffed around it? Can I, can I?
I want one.
Cara said...
(1) "...that doesn't really make any sense..."
Honey, NONE of it makes any sense.
That's not what they were going for with this.
(2) "...this cake is obviously some sort of special order..."
Yeah! That's so obvious.
(3) "..that means that the skillful baker who cracked this one out, also showed off their handwriting skillz, in black."
Okay--I will agree with you on this one. I see a frat house full of inebriated (and possibly high), sugar-craving party animals who simply wanted to do something SPECIAL for their Bud on his birthday. Why the tissue paper? Why the pink box? (Why the half-of-a-basketball shape?) Who cares? What I want to know is why all the fighting over who gets to open the box (evidenced by the torn cardboard), when no one has even bothered to cut the damn thing yet? STILL admiring the script???
("Dude, get away from the cake--I need more pictures! This is AWEsome!")
I really wish we knew what it was this person ordered.
"Hello! I'd like a cake."
"Done. Wait...sorry, this is my first day. I feel like I'm supposed to ask for details. Umm. Let's see, here. Well, do you want it to be flat?"
"HA! Good one. Do I want it to be flat. It's funny because it's cake. What other shape could it be?"
"Round?"
"Haha! Oh yeah, make that baby round."
Love your blog! Can't wait for the book!
The pink dots look like pink Smarties to me. Not MUCH of an improvement on pink Mentos, but an imporvement none the less.
My 6 year old son could write Happy Birthday better than this example of penmanship AND I'd bet he'd get all the right grammatical necessities in place, too!
How sad. As someone who makes round cakes w/out the help from a Wilton pan, I'm totally disgusted.
That's seriously professional??? Wow. Just. Wow. I mean, I wouldn't be surprised if one of my cakes turned out that way, but a baker? Amazing.
I think those might be M&M's. I can't believe a professional baker did that. Who put's tissue paper in the cake box? I call shenanigans!
I like the way they just ripped the lid off the box... they must have really anxious to get to that cake. Maybe all the smoking gave them the munchies!
At least he could have given this 'Birlday' ball a nicer colour, don't you think?
Nice thing though that tissues were given with the cake, that saves money!
The ashtrays look more disgusting to me than the cake. But that aint saying much!
Happy Birlhday!
I am just glad there is no navel and no baby emerging from this one!
So much is wrong here.... it makes my head hurt so I am going to stop trying to figure it out now.
this has really inspired me.. all my life I wanted to own a bakery and I never thought I would be good enough ... seeing that someone got paid for this has made me realize I could do it too... and possibly just as well... I can't wait... Thanks Cake Wrecks for making my dreams come true
rainbows and sunshine
oh and flowers too
There are no less than 3 ashtrays on that table. Let's face it...none of these people can actually taste anything anyway, so it doesn't matter what the pink things on the cake are.
I had trouble concentrating on the cake because the whole atmosphere around it was so......ewwww.
Judging by the ashtrays, I know exactly what this cake was supposed to be:
It's a bowling ball! The pink circles were supposed to be finger holes (fail).
I think this cake stems from a simple misunderstanding. "Do you want a square cake?- No, I want it round."
*blinks*
......
......
*blinks*
My 5 year old could decorate a cake better. o.O
I gotz it!
Happy birlday -> Happy b-IRL-day!
It's obviously a cake for a an internet junkie who is off for one day of RL, as a generous and well-meaning gesture from his/her fellow nerds. See? At least the inscription makes perfect sense now.
I'm thinking tumor.
First of all professional just means they charged money for it. That's all. And as for the tissue paper. Did they seriously think that was going to keep the cake from being ruined?
Gawrsh!Hyuck! if we just put this this tissue type paper in the box then all that icing and stuff will be right dern safe, Hyuck!
I like the little tissue paper nest, but it looks like there is a chunk of styrofoam on the lower left side. To hold the cake up? To indicate cake flavor? To indicate cake texture? To add more mystery to the whyness of this cake?
WV: Joyinnor--there was no joyinnor happiness at this party; the cake rolled away.
Did the creator think the super-long Y tails would jazz it up?
"They won't notice this is actually paper mache! Everyone will think it's too breathtaking to devour!"
Yes... breathtaking...
a crowning baby's head would just about complete this experience.
I have to remember to never, ever, ever put pictures of my cake where you could ever, ever find them. I have some winners but there are few, a few that make this one look lovely. Hahahahaha.
It's EPCOT, people! Big round white golf ball thingy, you know - EPCOT!