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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Tuesday
Mar082016

A Rose By Any Other Name... Would Be Weird

Every year on March 8st, we celebrate Unique Names Day.
So.

Here's to you, Dufus:

 

Slut Muffin:

 

...and the Head brothers:

Nuckle

 

Stupid

 

...and Butt.

(Unfortunately Block and Sh** couldn't make it.)

 

While we're at it, let's not forget the three other dwarves:

Testi

 

Eat Me

 

...and Dirtbag.

 

And last but not least...

Todd?

How'd he get in here?

 

Thanks to Alissa R., Andrea R., Heidi, Jessie A., Pamela M., Jessica C., Sophie C., Kim W., & Julie R. for sharing the love.

*****

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Reader Comments (31)

Fabulous John ! I learned not to sip my coffee while on cakewrecks each morning, dry keyboard today! These are hilarious and your commentary, awesome. What would you say to a cake that said "Happy Birthday Placentia". Yep, back in my medic days where a team helped deliver a baby in the field, mom asked what theywere waiting for after the healthy baby made her entry, they told her they waiting to deliver the placenta, she thought it was a nice name for her new baby girl, Placentia. Good thing she added the 'I" or it would have been grossly weird. lol

March 8, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterCookiemamaoki

Maybe the last one is To dd and the baker was not sure of the name (although dd is not really a unique name either)

March 8, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterRich K.

And to think that all these bakers were able to correctly spell both birthday AND congratulations. O_o

March 8, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterNonny

I wonder how many people will "get" Todd.

March 8, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterSilk

The "Eat Me" cake is making my brain hurt. What does it mean? How would an alien translate "tube with red flame + mugshot + command to consume self"? Seriously, the pressure is building behind my eyes. WHAT DOES IT MEAN?!

March 8, 2016 | Unregistered Commenters.marie

I can't be the only one surprised/disappointed that Slut Muffin got a cake that wasn't a bunch of cupcakes mushed together.

Hey, if you're giving me a chocolate and hazlenut cake, you can call me Stupid Head.

March 8, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterMoira

Funny, but that stupid head cake actually looked very yummy :D

March 8, 2016 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

"Todd ?" is a running storyline in the "Talking Kitty Cat" video series by Steve Cash (id: STEVECASH) on youtube. That's the first thing I thought of when I saw this. Steve adopts a young kitten, Gibson, and when Gibson learns to talk, her first word is "Help". Her second word is "Todd ?". Over the next set of videos we find out who Todd is, and why she's afraid of him.

Warning: If you visit the talking kitties, Sylvester, the older cat, has a foul mouth and a bad attitude.

March 8, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterSilk

(Oops - that's STEVECASH83 for the talking kitty cats.)

March 8, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterSilk

Another day of making my coworkers figure out what I am laughing for apparently no reason. Bravo, Jen!

March 8, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterKristin

But but but... "congratulations" was actually spelled right! If you don't mind that they forgot to cross the first T properly. Surely that should go down in Cake Wrecks history!

March 8, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterHAL

Cake #8 - one for teenagers maybe? 😁

March 8, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterGina

The first one amuses me most. I figure someone misread "Rufus."

March 8, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterClassic Steve

"March 8st"????


[Editor's note- Happy National Proofreading Day! Seriously. ;) -john (teh hubby of Jin)]

March 8, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterDave

Maybe Todd hasn't shown up to work in a few days, and his coworkers are hoping the cake will lure him back. As in, "Hey, Todd? Todd? Come back! There's cake!"

March 8, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterAB

Saw that someone suggested Dufus might be a misread. It isn't. Similar to George Foreman's kids all being named George, Dufus is actually the real name of each of the Head Brothers quintuplets. They get two cakes each year so that they will hopefully feel better about themselves.

March 8, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterDeborah

Reminds me of the Highlights characters Goofus & Gallant. Didn't you sometimes want to tie Gallant'S shoe laces together just to see him screw up just once?

March 8, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterAdo_Annie

Is 'We love you, Stupidhead' written in icing? It looks like marker on glass or on the photo, ???

March 8, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterPetra

@ Ado-Annie - OMG !!!!!!!!!! I haven't thought of Goofus/Gallant in centuries! Thanks for that!

Some of these cakes are downright... CREEPY... especially the "eat me" cake with the.... lipstick and face pic. Auck!

The "nuckle" head.. TAKES the cake! ROTFLMAO! Too funny

March 8, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterMaryO1230

March 8th is International Women's Day, so March 8st is open to other designations.
You read "nuckle" I read "nuckee...." goes well with head, too.

March 8, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterAlison in Indiana

@ Rich K.
I would like to expand on your theory:

The order actually said "two DD's" and was, in fact, a request for a cake featuring a drawing of two amply sized female breasts. This order was then read aloud by another employee to the decorator, who interpreted "two dd's" as "to dd". The "?" was added to express the employees' uncertainty about the inscription.

So, you order a cake with boobies and get one that says "Todd?" instead....talk about disappointing!

March 8, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterNerfbomb

Cookiemamaokie's story about the baby named Placentia reminded me of a tale making the rounds when I worked at Hopkins. A new mother wanted to name her daughter Vagina. The nurse explained why that wouldn't be acceptable, and described to the woman what a vagina actually was.
The patient looked at the nurse as if she'd taken leave of her senses. "That ain't no vagina. That there is your hootchie!" True? Who knows, but considering some of the things we DID actually hear in that place, I'm inclined to believe it.

March 8, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterLady Anne

Welcome, Dave. 8st is a thing here, like 3th and 5rd. I saw "Nuckee," too. Made me smile at the memory of Gilda Radner getting noogies from Bill Murray on early SNL sketches featuring The Nerds.

March 8, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterNobodee Home

Oh man these are hilarious. I would love to see their reactions to getting cakes like those. I am sure some would probably throw the cake at whoever ordered them lol.

March 9, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterArlene Marie

I sincerely doubt that Gilda was giving Bill any nuckee...

March 9, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterAlison in Indiana

I didn't see "nuckee head." I saw "nuckle head", a misspelled "knuckle head."

March 9, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterSilk

Slutmuffin will be my new on line name.

March 9, 2016 | Unregistered Commenterhotclaws

That first one seems like a sibling ordered the cake.

March 9, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterTrekkie Gal

@ Ado_Annie , I'm another one who had totally forgotten about Goofus and Gallant. I guess that tells you how long ago I went to the dentist...LOL.

March 9, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterMary Kay

I feel like a horrible, horrible person for laughing as hard as I did at the "Eat Me" cake.

March 9, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterBecca

I was on call for my job Tuesday night. I got called out at 6:15 PM, and I was still working on the situation at 8 AM. Taking a break from the stress, I got on CakeWrecks. Being awake all night + "Slut Muffin" = hysterical giggles. Thanks. I needed that.

March 9, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterJMixx

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