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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Wednesday
Oct122016

Marital Miss

 What They Wanted:

 

What They Got:

 

What They Wanted:

 

What They Got:

 

 Wanted:

 

 Got:

(I hear this one also came with cookies.)

 

 Wanted:

 

Got:

 

And last, but certainly least:

Wanted:

 

Got:

 

 

Thanks to Amanda B., Tara J., Dani N., Sue H., & Tiffany B. for sharing their Bridal Sweets turned Bridal Tiers.

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.

« The Times of Wreckerators' Lives | Main | Poor Kelley With Only One Eye »

Reader Comments (36)

Omg, that last one is just criminal.

October 12, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterV

You Really Can't Always Get What You Want

I saw her today at the reception
Holding her head in her hands
I saw there was simply no connection
‘Tween what she got and the cake she planned

You can't always get what you want
You can't always get what you want
You can't always get what you want
But if you try sometimes you might find
You get what you need

Her wedding had a dessert station
There were cookies as well as cake
Crying, she couldn’t hide her frustration
“I showed them photos, for goodness sake!!”

You can't always get what you want
You can't always get what you want
You can't always get what you want
But if you try sometimes well you just might find
You get what you need

I went down to the Chelsea Bakery
To file an official complaint
I was standing in line with Mrs. Jenny
And man, she was showing some restraint
She said you sometimes get what you pay for
Your favorite cake is beside the point
If you want a cake that’s lovely
You need to find a classy joint
I said to her

You can't always get what you want
You can't always get what you want
You can't always get what you want
But if you try sometimes you just might find
You get what you need
You get what you need, yeah, oh baby

October 12, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

What does it say about me if I think that the first cake is really not that wrecky at all?
Does that mean I gotta stop being on here on a daily basis? 'Cause that ain't happening. :-)

October 12, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterNonny

Good job, SuBee.
That first cake was a pretty good likeness of the original. I would not have complained about it too much. the others, well not so much and the last one was beneath any criticism.
The second cake, well, they wanted every layer white, check, they wanted black pearls, check, the scrolling behind the monogram was a good attempt. So the decorator followed instructions for changes, just without the original eptitude. The third cake would have been OK (not wonderful, but OK) if one did not know what the original looked like...

October 12, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterAlison in Indiana

1st wreck: groom topper to bride topper: "Never mind, my dopey love-fool! I shall call the plumber, and you can write in your memoirs how, on our wedding day, I rescued you from disaster...not from the bathtub overflowing from your darn bubble bath, but because of my hands being too slippery from suds to choke you!"
=^-.-^=

October 12, 2016 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

Fantastic SuBee especially since I'm on my way next weei to see the Rolling Stones in Vegas. PERFECT!

Hey! I don't know what all the fuss is about...The second cake DID get the "black pearls"......... so.. what's the issue?

OMG, I would be MORTIFIED to be a baker and show up w/ a cake like ANY of these and present them to the bride/groom. DAYUM !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

October 12, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterMaryO1230

So how did the blueberries(???) from Wreck #4 wind up scattered around Wreck #5?

October 12, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterTiggy

That last one is a travesty against cakeyness.....

October 12, 2016 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

The third cake isn't a wreck at all. It's not what the customer ordered, but it's very well made, with properly squared edges and a steady hand on the piping. If I were that customer -- and a regular Cake Wrecks reader -- I'd count my blessings that it was still a nice professional job!

October 12, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterLee

Oh my gosh - I completely forgot about those 'cookies'!!

October 12, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterKimS

What is that black filmy stuff doing by the side of wreck #5? Perhaps it is a mourning veil? I would be in mourning if this cake showed up at my wedding...or anyone else's wedding, for that matter.

October 12, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterBluebonnet

I had to enlarge that last one to see that it really was as bad as it looked in the smaller picture. It was worse! How can someone sell that wreck to anyone...let alone a bride on her wedding day! Yikes!!!

October 12, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterNikki

Are Wednesdays Wedding Wreck flashback day? I was excited for new wedding wrecks but I saw this post during my recent "how to scare the crap out of my soon-to-be=married friend" search through the wedding wrecks archive.

http://www.cakewrecks.com/home/2012/10/12/marital-miss.html

October 12, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterAmroyo

I always wonder what happens after the reception. Since a wedding is such an important life event, it is a wonder that these new couples don't spend their honeymoons in jail for assault. Do any of them ever get a refund? On the cake I mean, not the alleged assault.

October 12, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterEselle

1) I love that Lladro figurines are now a "thing" as cake-toppers.

2) There is nothing else good I can say about any of these

3) That first one wasn't actually difficult as presented. The near-miss they got back is in it's way more tragic than any of the pathetic pure fails.

October 12, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma

All shocking but the last one made me v sad .

October 12, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterJenny

Are the photos out of order?

October 12, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterAnnie

Every other one isn't that bad. Do we have to complain about everything?


[Editor's note- *sigh* -john (thoJ)]

October 12, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterSue

It's the old 'when the bride/groom says they want this cake but we don't like fondant' issue again. I mean, most of these would have been awful in fondant too, no doubt, but if you ask a bakery to make a fondant cake in buttercream chances are you will be disappointed. Maybe they tasted good?

October 12, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterLesley

Ok, I do see that the groom in Wreck #4 is holding a heart... but I've been a Wrecks fan long enough that I see a fireman's special hose.

October 12, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterSBC

So the last cake was dropped off at the reception… from a great height. The second-to-last cake did sort of, kinda, match the whimsy of the bride & groom figures, but the rest were cheap knock-offs of the "inspirational" cakes.

October 12, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterShirley

Subee that was genius! I still have tears in my eyes from laughing.

October 12, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterBrigham from Germany

Oh, lawsy! These weren't made by "professional bakers"! They were made by Loving Hands at Home. I agree with Nonny; either that first cake isn't all that bad, or we've been hanging around this site for too long.

October 12, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterLady Anne

The first one isnt really wrecky. Its not too bad. .
The rest, not so much.

October 12, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterMoonflwr912

The butterfly wreck is pretty bad! The figures holding the "hearts" in the photo though?? I had to do a double take as the hearts looked like other anatomy upon first glance.

October 12, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterLT

In glass half full news: these weren't as bad as they could have been! Thanks for lowering my cakey expectations Cake Wrecks! ;-)

October 12, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterErica

SuBee, outstanding!

How about this:

You can't always get what you ask for,
You can't always get what you ask for,
You can't always get what you ask for,
But if you try sometimes, you just might find
You just might find, you become Cake Wreck lore!

October 13, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterAdo_Annie

The first two are probably the best I've ever seen in this category. The design looks right, they're just a little sloppy.
The third ones the opposite, it looks really neat, but the design isn't right.
The last two are what I'm used to seeing on here.

October 13, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterThor

The first one wasn't terrible - not exactly like, but not awfully unlike either. It was dumpier and the glass beads were not pearly on the base... if the cake was what the baker themselves advertised, that definitely missed the mark a lot, but if the cake was someone bringing in the picture saying 'make me this'... then it's not the worst wreck I've seen on here.

The rest are just awful :P Especially that last one!

October 13, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterCarytsa

Oooo, you grubby-minded wreck-readers! I had to go back and look at the 'heart' the groom is holding, and you're absolutely right. No wonder the bride looks a little smug!

The black pearls look like someone was flinging them at a Christmas tree after a little too much egg-nog.

October 13, 2016 | Unregistered Commenterkismet

I would agree with everyone who says "Hey, some aren't that bad at all" IF they were homemade cakes. But these are professional cakes, and if I learned to make cakes and earn my money with it - and I bet all these cakes were not cheap - I can't get away with a cake that is a little sloppy or not 100% accurate. Especially when it is a wedding cake. It *has* to be perfect.

PS: I wonder if you can re-use the bird toppers as salt and pepper shakers...

October 13, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterChristina

The first wreck is better than the last one, but that's all you can say for it. The bride wanted a smooth white cake with bubbles floating on it: she got a lumpy beige cake with a bad case of chickenpox.

October 13, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterMorag

The first one...if they'd stuck with pearls at the base, instead of glass "gems", and kept the frosting pearls round, and maybe a bit smaller...they'd have been almost right on.

Is it just me, or does the topper on wreck-3 look almost like a salt-and-pepper shaker set? *snicker

That last one though. . .Wow

October 13, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterRogo

Morag - I beg to differ. That's definitely measles.

October 13, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma

Well the one with the bride and groom dolls in front of it.. I wouldn't want to stand on it either if those were supposed to be toppers. And even if they aren't toppers I still can't figure out how the wreckerator got that from the picture.. yikes.

October 14, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterArlene Marie

The second one looks like it has a mustache...

November 8, 2016 | Unregistered Commenter*snerk*

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