The Eyes Have It
August 4, 2015 It's National Eye Exam Month, guys! So how 'bout we give the old peepers a check up?
First, read the following aloud:
;)
[scribbling on clipboard] Good, good....
Now these:
;)
Hmm, not so good.
Let's try something else: read these numbers from right to left:
;)
;)
;)
Excellent.
Now, find the fly.
;)
Very good! Hard to believe the baker missed that.
Next let's test your visual pain tolerance. Tell me, which of these hurts more to look at?
A.
;)
Or B.
;)
Innnnteresting.
And finally, how many fingers am I holding up?
;)
Good news, your eyes are fine!
But these bakers may want to get their heads examined.
Thanks to Judy M., Miranda N., Amanda L., Ellin P., Wes T., Elissa R., Kimberly L., Spring P., & Claudia P. for seeing what we did there.
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Reader Comments (33)
Eye can't even.
Harkening back to Sunday's "sweets" post; the coloured pencil cake at the end is also the design of the Art College of Ontario in Toronto, Canada. Check it out; a real building balanced on "pencils".
They didn't see that fly (a real DEAD fly not a toy fly) near that cake?!?!? "Eye" yi yi!!
I'm still trying to figure out what it says on the first visual pain tolerance cake...
Is it
HAPPy BIRTHDAy MAy THE FOURIL:TH BE WITH yOU ???????? (What is FOURIL:TH????)
It's hard to tell. My eyes hurt too much to look at it for very long.
The second one down looks like it was written by a serial killer.
And the one with the fly...
No. Just no.
Backwards letters. Yeah.
I can't make out what is on cake #1 at all, but it is a lovely cake.
@Joan: *gigglesnort*
Okayyy....wow. The next-to-last thing looks like some kind of funky stove burner, or grill for cooking individual slices of pizza...
And...@Bigg3469: No, I don't believe that they did see the fly. It was just snuggled up to the cake, slurping up some yummy stuff, when the lid was slammed down on top of it. It was probably okay for a while, but then its teeny little lungs used up what air there was, and it started to gasp...and squeak out a pitiful little "HELP me...! HELLLP MEEEeeee...!" --followed by-well, you can guess.
Should we have a moment of silence? (I'll bet that was some party, whoever got that thing.) =^-.-^=
Nice. My eyes were fine, now thanks to this "test", they are screwed. :-P
Lord. I managed to chuckle and hold in the hysteria until the FLY and OMG I lost it. Glad i wasn't drinking anything and MAN, my eyes REALLY need new glasses because I couldn't make head nor tail of any of these scribbles. Also, if I were "Kim" I would be righteously PISSED about that cake!
Too funny. Made my day.
MaryO
Clearly, Kate's wreckerator is a hypnotist. If the writing was done in a darker color, I would really kinda like that cake. : )
I can't believe you didn't make a six-fingered man/Princess Bride reference. I would think you now look like Roger Rabbit trying not to sing out, "...two bits!!".
Yep. My eyes are definitely in pain after looking at those wrecks.
The second to the last cake is kind of impressive. Can't EVEN imagine having the steady hand and patience to pipe those perfect concentric circles; putting words on top is an insult. Whoever did that deserves to be banned forevermore from contact with eye-cing.
"Free fly with purchase of cake." It's all in the spin. You got to make them WANT the fly.... As for the rest, it's hard to spin a random slur of letters. Reminds me of my French pen pal I had many years ago for school..... I could read French just fine but not her letters! She had this amazing ability to make at least 7 letters all look like one symbol....
O_o
I work in the web-development unit of a state government agency. We get anonymous (by design) user feedback on the site, and some of the comments are priceless. Here's one about fruit flies: "I want to know how to eradicate them by death. complete annihilation. absolute destruction." [Punctuation and capitalization as provided in the original.] Clearly, we should have sent in a wreckerator!
Not only can I see the fly, I can see it is lying on its back with it's teeny tiny legs in the air. I imagine he knew he was trapped and ate as much sugar as his tiny belly could take. RIP, fly. RIP.
Funny, I actually did get my eyes checked this very afternoon.
I don't think even my new prescription is gonna help here, though.
Cake A - is FOURIETH a misspelled pun for an Anniversary cake? As in, "May the FORTIETH be with you." If so, I totally want this on my 40th. But we can skip the tennis net/flower arrangement. Maybe a sweet little Tauntaun or Hutt instead.
)-(vd50n'5 p4r3ⁿ75 5p0k3 l337.
After retiring from pitching, Antonio Alfonseca went into the cake decorating business.
Eye see extra protein with at cupcake cake *ptooie!* A double fail.
That last one is clearly Count Rugen's baseball glove.
I hate to say it, but the one with the fly...it was probably alive when it was trapped in the container!
I actually think that second one says "Happy April Fools Kim". Perhaps it wasn't really Kim's birthday as the stickers say???
Mine eyes have seen the glory
Of the coming of the wrecks
The bakers are professionals,
But all their cakes are dreck.
They cannot write their numbers
Nor count fingers worth a heck.
These wrecks are being sold.
Glory, glory, hallelujah
Why can’t the baker use a ruler?
There’s spider webs with writing and a fly on the orange ball.
These wrecks are being sold.
"Umam Huh Mohit"
"Happy Opirfadr~ Kim"
B. Definitely B. (Although A. gets bonus points for 'Fourieth"!)
Happy operation Kim???
Zippy FTW. No. 1, A and B are fairly nice. But they just HAD to write on them Couldn't leave well enough alone.
Nope now my eyes are messed up lol. Lovely cakes and I really wish I could unsee the dead fly. I hope whoever looks that over flees in terror and doesn't buy a cake from them ever.
Fourieth? Fourtieth? Fortieth? 40th woulda worked. I think!
Well, now I know how that old lady swallowed the fly: blinded by the orange icing, she mistook the fly for a chocolate jimmie (sprinkle, for the rest of you).
Hello! My name ees Inigo Montoya. You keeled my father with a (cough!) fly ball, prepare to die!
@Zippy - Standing O!
There's a perfectly good quip to be made about a six fingered man on that last picture.
the tragedy of dyslexic bakers is too real ...
OK, anybody--I'm dying here! I know it's been 9 days, but does anyone know what the first cake says, at all? It is driving me crazy! It seems to end in "no hit" or Mo hit", but that's all I can get...PLEASE help!
Is there a12-step program for bakers?