Chocolate Day Scat Fest
July 7, 2014 For Chocolate Day we decided to illustrate a beloved children's classic.
I highly recommend hitting play and reading along:
(Note: Mild language at the very end.)
Everyone Poops
An elephant makes a big poop.
;)
A mouse makes a tiny poop.
;)
A one hump camel makes a one hump poop.
;)
A two hump camel makes a two hump poop.
;)
Hahaha, only kidding.
Fish poop...
;)
...and so do birds.
And bugs, too.
Different animals make different kinds of poop.
;)
Different shapes, different colors, even different smells.
;)
Which end is the snake's behind?
;)
What does whale poop look like?
Some stop to poop, others do it on the move.
;)
Some poop here or there.
Others do it in a special place.
;)
Grownups poop. Children poop, too.
While some children poop on the potty, others poop in their diapers.
;)
Some animals poop and pay no attention.
Others clean up after themselves.
These poop by the water:
;)
This one does it in the water.
He wipes himself with paper then flushes it down.
;)
All living things eat, so everyone poops.
;)
Thanks to Stephanie M., Beth W., Lisa R., Dede H., Robin, Robin E., Anony M., Anna O., Anthony S., Wendi P., Anita C., Cassandra M., Christie D., & John W. for our crappiest post yet.
(Can you believe none of those were supposed to look like poop? Except maybe the rainbow swirly one - which I'm guessing is unicorn poop, and therefore gets a free pass.)
(SEE WHAT I DID THERE?)
*****
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Reader Comments (42)
And just like that, a perfect Cakewrecks post is born.
Maybe the rainbow poop is supposed to be "Oh the Places You'll Go," although I'm not sure that's the going Dr. Seuss had in mind.
That first cake is a tribute to the way our litter box looked that unfortunate year we used tinsel at Christmas.
I don't know what Tigger is doing to Winnie-the-Pooh on the 3rd-last cake, but I suspect the kids won't understand.I think Winnie-the-Pooh would appreciate the "effort" that went in to these cakes, though. Quote:
“When you are a Bear of Very Little Brain, and you Think of Things, you find sometimes that a Thing which seemed very Thingish inside you is quite different when it gets out into the open and has other people looking at it.”
As much as I love choclate frosting, they have made it look sooo unappetizing O_o
Are Tigger and Pooh doing the nasty? Just what is going on in that cake????
So THAT's where cupcakes come from....makes total sense now.... :/
Sharyn: that comment. I love you.
But I still wonder: what is that first pile with the blue streak supposed to be?
I don't know which is worse on the "having a baby cake".... the poop in the middle or the pathetic attempts at smiley faces done in pee yellow.
Oh, the memories of this book! My ex used to tell people when I was pregnant that we were going to have a kid who didn't poop so he'd never have to change poopy diapers. One of his colleagues suggested that I get him this book, which I did for Christmas that year. I still have the book.
My son was born at the end of January. In February, my sister and her husband came from Germany to stay with my parents during their semester break while they did internships. We met them for lunch at a mall one day, and they were very excited. They'd been to the bookstore and discovered there was a WHOLE SERIES of these books -- Everyone Pees, Everyone Farts, Everyone Cries, etc. In fact, they were a bit TOO excited about it.
Sort of like Sponge Bob in that fifth cake. He's a little too excited about pooping. What's your fetish, Squarepants?
And I don't care who's doing the pooping. If anyone or anything is POOPING cupcakes, I'm not touching them.
I think Tigger is just pouncing. Otherwise, Piglet wouldn't be holding his tail. Or maybe there's something kinky I don't know about.
That does it. I'm never eating store bought cupcakes again! O.O
@Sharyn ~ We did that one year, too. Only once.
Ladies and gentlemen: A Cake Wrecks Classic!! Bravo! Bravo! Start the presses! (This will be in the next book, right....?)
Hmmm, the smiley faces do look a bit like unrolled condoms
--which would explain the baby they're having...
@Jennifer and @Sharyn, you two just made me laugh as hard as Jen did!
Somehow, the "We're Having a Baby" cake describe more or less accurately what is awaiting the parents.
For those who think Tigger and Pooh are gettin' it on, note the presence of Piglet. They are obviously having a three-way. None of our business.
"We're having a baby" and at least one parent is seriously mentally disturbed.
Those white things on that football-shaped poop are probably intestinal worms. Might want to get that checked.
What? Wait. I thought unicorns shi...err...pooped rainbows. So disappointed.
dbc - I had the same thought about the smiley faces on the having a baby cake... I didn't see the faces right away(for all the other decorations)...
Sometimes you have to wonder about things people celebrate - intentionally or otherwise!
This was craptastic.
Well. Scansions a bit off, and most of the wrecks didn't make it in, but here's a 'sound' offering. :)
When unicorns fly,
And they drop, they drop tasty treats
When you're sure you've had enough
Of this art, well hang on...
Don't let them wreck more
'Cause every wrecker tries
And everybody poops... sometimes
Sometimes everything is wrong
Now it's time to sing along
When snakes look like crap (Hold on, hold on)
If you feel like letting go (Hold on)
If Spongebob has had too much
Of Crabby Patties, hang on...
Everybody poops
Take comfort in the fact
Everybody poops
Rainbow or bland, oh yeah
By surprise or planned
When you feel like being alone
No, no, no, you are not alone
If you're just a bear in this life
Whose name is simply Pooh
When you think you've had too much honey... hang on
Well, everybody poops... sometimes
Every wrecker tries
Everybody poops sometimes
And everybody poops sometimes
So hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on
Everybody poops
Craptacular post! My aide bought me this book for Christmas after I expressed disbelief that a book would actually show drawings of different kinds of poop.
Decorators could avoid 99% of these crappy cakes by coloring their chocolate frosting-and NOT applying it in swirly patterns.
Ewwwwww.....but hilarious too!
Enough said 'bout poop.
I just wanna go back to
Enjoying choc'lat.
The Spongebob cake is so gloriously wrong I can't help but wonder if it was intentional. Of course, I'm not sure if that kind of comic gold can be created with intent.
Gives a whole new meaning to Winnie the Pooh.
I'm more concerned about the hot Tigger-on-Pooh action than I am about the poopy cakes.
@Sue W., maybe it is just unicorns that...poop...rainbows. Maybe Pegasus unicorns are in charge of pooping cupcakes?
Wow, a threesome on Cake Wrecks! What should we call it? A Tiggerpooglet? A Pigpoogger? A Poohtiggglet?
As for the rest... Well, they defy belief, and I look forward to the day that I can eat chocolate frosting without gagging. Hrrrk...
The fairy tale castle looks suitably horrified - at least to me!
Oh Sponge Bob. Looks like someone's been eating his Colon Blow!
The video made me laugh like a moron.
Well, my waistline thanks you for making me never want chocolate again.
I literally forgot I was looking at cake until halfway through - then I was like OH SHOOT THESE ARE CAKES NOT ILLUSTRATIONS TO THIS STRANGE WHITE MORGAN FREEMAN READER MAN'S BOOK
OMG, I'm away for weeks and THIS is the post I come back to?
Ughhhhh.
Really, really disgusting. Brown should be oulawed as a free-form frosting color...
But I have to admit, "We're having a baby" was such a perfect statement of existential angst it made me laugh.
Really hard.
brian t, that quote is perfect!
@Rachel CrazyMum I like Tiggerpooglet. I second the motion for calling this 3 way a Tiggerpooglet...all in favor....?
Lol so much poop in one day. Wow. I wouldn't be able to even pay for the cakes here without laughing hysterically.
Wow! FABULOUS post!! Too funny. :)
Okay... so that Unicorn Pooping Cupcakes cake is so bizarre... why would anyone ever draw that?? I figured it had to be a "thing," that's not your standard fare for the cake display, no no. So... I looked and found this...
http://www.cafepress.com/+unicorns-pooping-cupcakes+gifts
And this:
http://www.hotstuffmerchandise.com/product-unicorn-fart.aspx
So CCCs are REALLY just a gathering of unicorn farts... that explains SO much. ;)
The OSU blob is supposed to be a buckeye. People from Ohio are freaks about anything buckeye. Trees, shirts, Brutus Buckeye, etc.
That one that says OSU on it - it was obviously made by someone from U of O!! (college rivals - I guess you have to be an Oregonian to truly appreciate just how great that cake really is!! Go Ducks!!) LOL
I don't know why but the word "poohtiggglet" makes me giggle in a most poohculiar way!
Well! My dreams will now be haunted by shattered childhood memories, Tigger and Pooh. Thanks.