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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Thursday
Jul172014

The Far Side of Cake, Vol. 10

By an unfortunate coincidence, little Tyler's cake was a grim reminder of the Great Triple-Flush Funeral of 2013.


 

In retrospect, Ann realized there probably were better ways to tell Joe they'd be watching 2001: A Space Odyssey that weekend.

 

He'd specifically said "pear-shaped," but now Tanya was starting to question some of her design choices.

(By the awesomely weird Fondant Fantasies by Tanya)

 

The three did everything together, working as a seamless unit. Only the most discerning eye could detect where one's talent left off, and the other's began.

 

Daisy paused, struck by the thought. What if she had gone too far? What if Robert didn't understand? What if all this really was just... lip service?

 

The boss said Renee should be more specific with her praise - so she was pretty sure he'd approve of his surprise treat in the conference room.

 

Thanks to Heather D., Crystal B., Bunny W., Ginny V., Beth B., & Jennifer K. for keeping it far out.

*****

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Reader Comments (38)

Sung to "Splish Splash"

Fish Flush
It came back in a rush
Caused that Tyler kid quite a fright.
Oh, ouch
Joe's collapsing on the couch
Thinks they made a baby, that's right

Now everything's gone pear-shaped
Can't add one sprinkle more
A doggie cake with wax lips
Ain't my favorite décor...

And now...oh, hush
That cake's making me blush
How was I to know you'd tell the world they got it on?

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

I loved this so much!!!!!!!! These always make me smile, and Cake Wrecks is, like, the best thing to happen to the internet since forever!
Would you mind if I used the line 'The three did everything together, working as a seamless unit. Only the most discerning eye could detect where one's talent left off, and the other's began.' as a fanfiction prompt? Cos reasons. S'OK if you say no.

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterdolphin

What is coming out of those pears? AAAAAHHHHH!!!

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterDrockbox

Not to mention the projected baby on the second cake will have extra-extra-long arms when it will be born. Maybe a future basketball player?
And I would definitely give those "pears" a mammogram… though I doubt they would survive it.

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterAthena

BHwahahahaha@sharyn :D. As for those pears-how could they not see it???

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

Do you think the person ordering cake no.4 said "I want sprinkles" or was she more vague?

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterNicole

# 4 is my favorite. LOVE the caption -- otherwise it would just be a head-tilt-deer-caught-in-headlights moment.
Thank you, CakeWrecks, for once again starting my day with chuckles and laughs.

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterMaureen

What does it MEAN???? What does the giant sprinkles orb of doom MEAN?????? I MUST KNOW!!!!!!!!!

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJulie

A swarm of sprinkles. Never seen that before!

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterTLC

*small voice* I couldn't figure out what was wrong with the pears until I read the comments. I thought they were featured because it looked like they were infested with worms. Now that it's been pointed out that's ALL I can see!

That clown cake is going to give me nightmares. I hate clowns!

I've missed you guys. I got a new assistant at work after having zero help for seven years. I'm so happy about that, except it cuts into my time goofing off at CakeWrecks!

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJodi

It took me a while, some googling, and a visit to Tanya's Facebook page in hopes of garnering insight, but I think that maybe, just maybe, those pears have nipples and they're a perfect "pair". Because otherwise, eewwww.

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterMiss Mindy

Oh! That last one is pure Doctor Sheldon Cooper! Heaven help us all.

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterLady Anne

Is that... An entire mound of sprinkles???

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSeabird

Ballpark- out! Awesome job (and by that I mean me, I didn't spit coffee on my keyboard or monitor or shirt!)

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterms anthrope

Maybe Tyler's fish flipped upside down when they tilted the cake to get the sprinkles all to one side. That explains the fish, but why would they want the sprinkles only on one side?

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterlisadh

I really like that last one! I imagine it being in TBBT. One of Sheldons collegues has gotten a baby, and his mother (and possibly even Amy) has told him he should bring something, like a cake. And Voila! There it is.

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterErgilwen

The last cake was ordered by Sheldon Cooper.

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterNo Capes

Where is "I Want Sprinkles" girl now? I found a cake for her...

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSusan

Last one: And that was the last time Renee would ask Sheldon Cooper to order a baby shower cake. He was miffed, though, when he saw that the prepositions and indefinite article were capitalized and, boy, did the decorator hear about it!

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterpikkewyntjie

No! no, no. I can tell. The one that made the orange flower also squirted orange silly string icing all around the edges of the cake. I have...a discerning eye. (Just one though.)

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterKnittedbooties

Welp, I'm done eating pears now.

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterEmily

Who knew there could be any confusion when the order called for a great pair of t*ts! FYI, I am incredibly embarrassed to have typed that, but it had to be said, and I needed to beat Mel to the punch:)

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterCBushLite

Sooooooo...someone would actually ask for a large sheet cake with "Congratulations on making a human withyour genitals" written on it? Anyone who has ever done so, please tell me what the occasion was...

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJo

I gotta confess I kinda like that last cake. I know a number of people who really need it, since they've never gotten praise for their only accomplishment....

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterOldish Lady

Went to the Fondant Fantasies site. Tanya does some AMAZING work, but do not click that link if you ever again plan to sleep. Seeing the mastery that is the Beck's bottle (on the site) may just be worth missing a few decades of sleep.

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterAngelaS

Are those pear nipples?
I seriously don't know how I feel about that...

That last cake though? Perfect.
Now where is the birthday cake that says, " Congratulations on your continued existence for another full rotation around the sun."?

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterCary G

All my life I have been looking for the perfect baby shower cake. #4 is it.

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterFM

I have a friend who had a fish that would swim upside down. So, this cake might not be too far off.

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJo

I love pears. Well, I used to love them. O.O
The Grandma thing has now hit social media along with a picture of the little amoeba. Sorry Jen and john (fok thoJ) but I'm NOT giving anyone ideas for baby shower cakes by sending them here. Ehh... maybe I'll send them here and tell them "Only look at the ones tagged Sunday Sweets and choose from those!" Wait, we could end up with a fantastic wreck of epic proportions that I could submit!

Hey john, when I've come here the last 2 days I've gotten an error message. I just emailed you a screenshot.

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJodee

I can't help it....I find the "Congratulations" cake hilarious. Perhaps I should get that checked.....

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterChannon

The sprinkles represent a huge swarm of killer bees headed to pollinate the flowers at left. The orange squiggles ... not a clue.

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterTricia L

On this very fine Thursday my true love gave to me
Twelve words he spelled right
One squishy fetus
Countless sweet sprinkles
genital coupling

A-clown-with-big-lips

several plastic beads
three dead fish
Too, too many wrecks
And an oddly erotic pear, wheeee

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

Am I the only person who checked, twice, to make sure Congratulations was spelled correctly on the last cake?

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterDaphne

@CBushLite: while you were busy punning...I was drinking punch....and, I can't believe you typed that, either....well done, well done.... :-)

July 17, 2014 | Unregistered Commentermel

i never really liked pears, but now i never want to eat one again.

July 18, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterarchersangel

lisadh, here's my theory: the sprinkles represent the uneaten fish food floating on top of the water because the fish had all died of overeating.

July 18, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterhyphen8

Well done Jen! The Far Side of Cake posts are some of my favorites: does Gary Larsen know you've been borrowing his brain?

July 18, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterhyphen8

I vote we have a short story contest, each of us picking one of the Far Side of Cake captions for our first sentence. Jen and John (thoj) get to be the judges. Reasy, set, GO!

September 1, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterPauline

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