Search

My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Friday
Jan312014

Super Bowel To The Rescue!

Sports fans, are you worried you've picked a crappy caterer for the big game this weekend?

THERE'S YOUR SIGN.

 

'Course everyone knows Super Bowl parties are mostly about the food, so I guess it makes sense to have two pools of milk battling it out with colorful spatulas:

(No lie, it took me a solid ten seconds to realize that's NOT what this is.)

 

I'm still having trouble with team names, so somebody remind me:

Who is Sea Hawles, and why did Pac-Man have to die for him?

 

I do remember the Colts, though, because there's a young boy named Jack who is a huge Colts fan.

Unfortunately for Jack, though, if you write "Colts" a bit sloppily on the order form it can end up looking like a much different word:

Mee-YOWCH.

 

It's a shame Jack couldn't switch with 6-year-old Reagan, who just wanted a pretty horse and flowers on HER cake:

On the plus side, Mom and Dad, I don't think Reagan wants a pony anymore.

 

Best of luck to both teams this weekend, and remember: Whatever happens, we can all take comfort in knowing there's only one real loser:

via

(I need to find the baker who did this, and shake her hand.)

 

 

Thanks to Sharyn H., Tara M., Kristy F., Sarah B., Jennifer F., & April M. for bringing her best game face.

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.

« Chasing Shadows, Deja Vu The Third | Main | Seahawks vs Broncos: The Wreck-Off »

Reader Comments (49)

Is anybody else looking forward to the huge Super Bowel Blow-out sales on Monday?

Yeah, me neither...

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

I would try to shellac that cookie or something so I could use it as a Christmas ornament just cause I'm so glad my teenage daughters finally realized he's a do**chebag.

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJillM

OMG! I love the Biebs in the jumpsuit. Best use of a gingerbread cookie cutter EVER!!!

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterAngelica

I STILL don't know what the spatula-battling pools of milk are supposed to be.

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSteph

What IS that first one supposed to be? I've taken more than 10 seconds, and I can't figure it out.

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterChris

**sigh** And we tried valiantly to teach Jen the correct way to spell Seahawks. Thanks wreckoraters!

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJodee

I want that cookie. Just to be able to bite his head off. (After removing the bit of plastic, of course.)

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterRoxy Random

Only twelve lives left.
My quarters go to eating
frosted power pellets.

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

Count me in with those who still don't know what the first cake is supposed to be. It looks like two electric hand mixers touching beaters.

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJodi

Makes me glad i'm not a football fan. As for the bieber cookie bwahahahaha :D

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

au contraire, I think Reagan will be delighted with what is obviously one kick-*ss pony. It would even beat up Kublai Khan, because like Brian Boitano it doesn't...

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterkhereva

I think the sign at the top is really an ad for a clean eating cleansing party….

@SaraCTV (re: Wednesday): Not much to see in there…cobwebs and a lone cat's eye rolling around, since I’ve already lost most of my marbles…

@Karate Lady (re: Wednesday): thanks for the shout out about “Catatonic Catnip Catastrophe.” It is fun to read, and it is really a compliment to you, your clever writing and your ability to let loose and just have some fun! (And…all of our fun and silliness here is courtesy of Jen and john(thoJ) who allow us to get a little crazy, so thanks to them!) If memory serves me, at one time you were hesitant to jump in…well, now, welcome! The more the merrier!

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered Commentermel

I genuinely thought that first one was some kind of hand mixer.

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterAdria

@ Steph - football helmets. :)

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterCC

I'm always amazed that you know what half the cakes on your site are supposed to be. Your powers of discernment are quite incredible. When you don't spell it out for me I sit in the dark waiting for someone to enlighten me. I even went to the official Super Bowl website to see if I could find something that would be a dead giveaway for that first cake--nope, still nothing.

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterHeather

Nope, I can't figure it out either. I've tried squinting, looking at it sideways, close up, far away, everything I can imagine. Still looks like meringue with mixer beaters to me. The colored dots just seem to be making it worse, though my gut tells me they should help in some way.

Happy F'n birthday Jack--or am I the only one seeing that?

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterAngela

I'm rooting for the Dyslexic Seawhales.

Actually, I'm going to the opera. Yup, I'm that person.

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

Apparently I have to be that girl... Go Hawks! Also, my brain has started to automatically add that 'E' into Bowl now. That's awkward.

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterHeather A

OK, I don't get the Jack one. I'm sure I will feel like an idiot when it's explained to me, but no clue. Can someone help?

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterNaomi

I've been looking at your Amazon links...
I don't buy much, but every little bit helps, I suppose.
So could you please provide a link to Amazon Germany, as that's where I do my shopping?
And I'm not sure if clicking on the UK-link and then working my way to the German site would still benefit you. The info that it's your link I'm using to shop might get lost on the way.

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterMafdet

Party poopers!

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSusan

@Naomi: As near as I can tell, and this is an educated guess, the person asked for a football cake with "Colts" on it, and the person who made the cake read "colts" as cat. Result? A giant football with a cat sitting under it.

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

@ Naomi, I think poor Jack got a Cats cake instead of a Colt's cake.

I'm going to make that beiber cookie in salt-dough form and hang it on my Christmas tree.

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterKelley

@Naomi - I may be wrong, but on Jack's cake, I believe they were going for "Colts" and received "Cat" instead. Poor Jack...

As for the Justin cookie, I agree with @Angelica - best use of a gingerbread cookie e-vah!

Everyone else, check out @CC's comment above - that's what the first cake was supposed to be. So close...

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterAnne-Marie

Naomi - they wrote "colts," yet received a cat.

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

Those piles of white (is that a CCC? Ptooie!) are SUPPOSED to be football helmets. The spatula-looking-things are the grills in the front. Give the wreckerator a C for effort.
GO SEAHAWKS!!!!!!!!

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterMaureen

Oh. Em. Gee. Helmets on the first one??? Really?? I...never would have gotten that without help.

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterMissy

Awwwww, I want that cute little not-a-colt figurine! The big cookie too, because it's been a long week. Bring on the Super Bowel snacks!

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterCheesymice

@Naomi:
I tried my "click-on-the-photo-to-enlarge-and-read-what-it-says-above-the-image" trick on the "Happy 7th birthday Jack" thing, and this is what it reads along the top edge: "sarahbla.ow.likescoltsbdaynotcats.jpg?" So, there you go! I hope that explains everything for you. (It didn't for me, but I don't really "get" the whole football gig, anyway...) =^-.-^=

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

Well, at least the catering is honest.

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterAirrider

Hats off to you on that first cake, Jen, because it took me over a minute before I finally got it and then I just groaned.

For those who haven't yet, think of what the cake would look like with it turned 90% counter-clockwise.

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterLady Kal

Superbowl Dreidels?

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterCarol

That's okay, SuBee, I'm going to the symphony unless the weather gets nastier.

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterdrgns4vr

Thanks, CC. :) But still...square helmets, eh?

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSteph

@Naomi - they asked for "Colts" and got. "cat". 😸😹😺😻😼😽😾😿🙀

Absolutely love the Bieber jumpsuit cookie!!! 👮💃

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered Commenteranony mouse

OK, first picture: somehow I keep seeing MY bowels on a platter...urg.

Second picture, the two beautiful white stand mixers battling bravely...I hate to break to you all, but they are apparently supposed to be FOOTBALL HELMETS! My eyes are sad. Those beaters are actually the grid that apparently covers the players' tooth area.

And Jack's cake makes my eyes sad, too. I mean, c'mon wreckerator--if instead of Colts, you saw Cats, why is there ONLY ONE CAT???

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterCloudy

Long time lurker, occasional poster. I too saw mixer beaters for that first cake. It took me a whole five minutes to realize that its supposed to be 2 helmets, mouth (chin?)-guard to mouth(chin?)-guard. It is a testament to your brilliance, Jen, that you could figure it out in only 10 seconds. Pac-man was the first thing I thought of too for the next cake. Haiku Joy - wonderful as always. Mel - whatever happened to the law firm. I miss Mr. Potato, Head Counsel. Did they go out of business? Keep up the great work everyone. You all make my lunchtimes very funny.

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJoeMama

@Naomi: Apparently when "Colts" is written poorly it looks like "cats"? Hence the random black cat on the bottom of the cake.

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterTiffany

@Naomi: It's a cookie, and it has "Happy 7th Birthday Jack" on it. So, yeah~ I don't "get" whatever it is, either. Because I don't have a dirty mind. =^-.-^=

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

Well, the Colts didn't appear on that cake and they also aren't appearing in the Super Bowl, but the Broncos are and their insignia would probably give a pony-loving little girl nightmares.

I finally saw the football helmets but, if you're having trouble, try turning your head sideways or you could give your monitor a 1/4 turn to the left perhaps. What a mess. :-)

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterGinger

Hey, is anyone else here reading this with a head-soundtrack playing Rick James' "Super Freak", and substituting the word "bowl" for "freak"? ("It's a very special game, the kind you could take home to muthah, and will always let you get first down, once you kick it off the street...") No? Maybe? (Well, anyway- that game's alright with meeee, yeahhhh!!)
=^-.-^=

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

I eventually saw the helmets on my own. Not sure if I should be proud or ashamed on that. But either way my head and eyes now hurt.

January 31, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterKat

Loving that cookie lmao. My goodness wreckerators are lucky the fans aren't chasing them hehe.

February 1, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

Years ago, when my best friend got married, I gave her a set of wood salad bowls as a gift. The thank you card read "Thank you for the lively salad bowels!"

I thought #2 was two electric hand mixers battling... Silly me...

February 1, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterMudhooks

I'm from Washington state, so of course everything here is Seahawks 24/7, which frankly I'm getting a little tired of. I'll be glad once the Superbowl is over and things can go back to normal. I hope our boys win, of course, but I won't be watching (I would have no clue what was going on), and I'm just tired of all the coverage.
That being said, that Justin Bieber cake is glorious. Especially timely because the petition at WhiteHouse.gov to deport the Biebs back to Canada just reached 100k signatures, which means the White House must make a response of some kind.
Did I sign? Do you even have to ask?

February 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterEmma

Awful, but funny, I dread to think what wreakerators would do with the RBS ^ Nations, the annual feast of international rugby that has just kicked off here!

February 2, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterdiddleymaz

So um... Glad someone finally pointed this out, but I feel like it bears repeating since everyone said "GO SEAHAWKS" but obviously doesn't know who they're playing.
Yes, they have a horse on their jerseys, but it's the Denver BRONCOS, not the Indianapolis Colts (whose logo actually happens to be a big "C") going to the Superbowl!
Anyway, I guess that's why this is a cake blog. Haha! :D

February 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterLydiaK

OMG that 2nd cake... for some reason I read it as Seawhores.... you know like that guy on youtube has those videos about animals and he sounds like Morgan Freeman. ... 'like the seawhores do.' bahahahah

February 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJeanne

Seahawks became Seahawles because of someone's loopy cursive handwriting.

February 6, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterFrank

PostPost a New Comment

Enter your information below to add a new comment.
Author Email (optional):
Author URL (optional):
Post:
 
Some HTML allowed: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong>