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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Friday
Aug022013

Friday Favs

Welp, it's Friday. Time for Jen's Favorite Quick Laughs of the Week!

(See, if I capitalize it that makes it all official-like.)

 

I call this one, "'Cuz McDonalds is hiring."

 

"MAN BISCUITS"

I don't want to eat them; I just want to order a couple. Loudly.

 

"Steamrolled Minnie"

Anyone else having Roger Rabbit flashbacks?

(On the plus side, now she qualifies for flat-rate shipping!)

[bah-dum-CHA.]

 

"When A Farewell Turns Curiously Personal"

Wreck or no? Me, I could go either way.

 

Have you heard? "Death by Chocolate" is so last week.

The newest trend in desserts is "Death by Giant Ice Cream Cone."

Now we just need a man biscuit topped with a chocolate piano.

 

"Mischief Managed"

Best. Wedding display. Ever.


Thanks to Jessica P., Sam D., Julie R., Karen B., Letty B., & Jennifer C. for putting the backwards "YA!" in "Friday."

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Reader Comments (66)

A tasket, a tisket
I grabbed a sweet man biscuit...

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

Oh dear the icecream cone one is killing me-and I love buttercream frosting. Sharyn hehehe

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

The man biscuits are adorable. I love the way each one has a different smile, ranging from happy to nervous. I'll take a happy man biscuit, please.

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBB, Miami

What is going on in the last one? I can't figure it out.

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSarah

That last one...YES! YES! YES!

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterEric Stott

Batchelor party
Was a little too much booze.
Stairs defeat groomsmen.

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterdrgns4vr

Poor Minnie! And I'm still trying to figure out why there are 3 grooms (unless groomsmen and bridesmaids now get to be represented on cakes; phooey to that).

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterHeather

Poor Evan. Hegot a wreckerator who couldn't spell the simplest of words, and didn't give a damn about the rest of the cake, either. At least the other cakes look like some effort was put into them -- even if it was not the most successful.

I would love to hear the line of reasoning behind putting the ice cream cones on the cookies,a nd why they thought this would be attractive. And why they left them there after they saw the result.

The only thing the wedding cake needs is a tiny but vivid pool of blood at the bottom of the stairs.

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterTLC

At least Minnie isn't a dreaded cupcake cake (I can see the possibly).

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterEvenSong

Mischief Managed--ha! Those moving staircases get me every time.

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterbonnie

Somebody get Minnie a man biscuit; I think it might fix what's ailing her.

(I finally managed to stop rhyming, but the coughing when I laugh is still making this site dangerous for me!)

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterzoomom

Oh, my gosh!! The groomsmen took a header into the cake! Too funny - thanks for the much needed laugh today.

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterheloise

I just thought what happened to the groomsmen. They just heard about Evan!!

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterheloise

Heather, I think the fully upside-down one is the minister.

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterClassic Steve

"I don't want to eat them; I just want to order a one. Loudly."
I can't stop laughing.

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAngela

Man Biscuits are ok, but I'm really more in the mood for a Stud Muffin.

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMe

Evidently the entire Groomsmen's party on that last cake snuck out of the bakery and went wild in the Liquor department... O_o

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma

Ahem... uh, hi, everyone.

Cake #1 - *sigh* ...and, yet... no sprinkles.

Cake #2 - Oh... all it needs is some gingerbread cheerleaders for the party...

Cake #3 - That one made me giggle at work. I can only hope she does not get up and reveal herself as some psycho toon with knife eyes and out for mayhem. (Then again, if that's the case... we'd better have some dip handy. Well, I guess decorators do have some with them, as seen on this very blog.)

Cake #5 - Err, sorry. I see some other thing here... a very enthusiastic version of the Man Biscuits. WHERE ARE THE GINGERBREAD CHEERLEADERS???

Cake #6 - If the staircase is edible, then that's a pretty good work. No matter what the ex-husband thinks.

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterGutz Grilla

About that last one:
♫ And they're fall-ling down the sta-airway... to he-eaven. ♫

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterjustlurkin

I agree with Gutz Grilla's interpretation of "death by ice cream cone." Don't you see the little blue pill in the hand of one of the gingerbread men? That's not an ice cream cone that's his …well, you get the idea.

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterjustMe

("Run! Run! As fast as you can! You can't catch ME~I'm the Gingerbread...Manbiscuit?")
Ah, yes~one of my childhood favorites...!
The "Minnie" one is wrong on a few levels...not the LEAST of which is that she/it has a "realistic" FIVE-count of fingers on each "hand". EVERYONE knows that Minnie and Mickey have always had only FOUR digits per hand. Maybe the wreckcreator was worried about copyright infringement? No need to be; one can only be sued if an image RESEMBLES a copyrighted one, and this one...? I rest my cake-er, case.
"Bi Evan": Maybe it was supposed to be "Big Evan" and the customer just couldn't afford the additional letter. Times are tough all over.
Next-to-last: Are you implying that half of a fake ice cream cone suffocating a gingerbread man may NOT have been the effect that they were shooting for??
The last one: Guys...what ARE ya gonna do with 'em? I tried to tell them not to go DOWN the "UP" escalator when they were drunk...((SIGH))
=^9.6^=whoa..

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

1. Narrowly avoiding an infringement lawsuit by the estate of Theodor Geisel?

4. Also, being crushed by flowers. Or possibly just trapped and unable to escape a horrible death by sneezing.

6. Now they are protected from the terrible secret of cakes. Are there stairs on your cake?

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterNyperold

I also want to loudly order man biscuits. That made me laugh out loud.
And just random aside, I miss Epbot. Take care of yourself and take the time you need to get your mojo back, but just wanted to let you know that little corner of the blogoverse is greatly missed.

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterNagzilla

Cake 1) Touché, Jen....

Cake 2) "Hey, lady, keep your hands off my man biscuits!"

Cake 3) "I'm not flat, I'm just baked that way."

Cake 4) probably half chocolate and half white....

Cake 5) That'll put an end to all that screaming for ice cream....

Cake 6) The Fall of Man...

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSkewed View

RE; that last cake, it looks like the groom showed up after all, so the bride could toss all the "spares."

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSW

WAIT WHOAH the gingerbread flowers? That's some strategic placing..

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKarin

LMAO! I think this was one of your best, Jen! Hahahahahahaha!!!

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterlisadh

I find Minnie's feet, or more her ankles, painful to look at.

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterTrasawee

#1 Guidance counselors with a bent for sarcasm should not send cakes.

#2 "I'dlikeoneofthoseplease."
"What? I can't hear you."
"I said, I'd like oneofthoseplease."
"I'm not quite getting it. Could you say it slower?"
"I'd. Like. One. Of. Thoseplease."
"One of whatplease?"
"A manbiscuit."
"A what?"
"A MAN BISCUIT!!!"
"Well, why didn't you say so? Here ya go, luv." (to co-worker) "I just love making the gents say it real loud."

#3 Ok, I see what you did there, Jen.

#5 It took a while for this one to 'click'. If the man biscuit is a man, then an ice cream cone to the same scale would be... Oy. Chocolate piano?

#6 Planking: You're doing it wrong. (It's also over.)

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

To be fair, maybe Evan just made a big announcement and wanted to celebrate with cake. Cake makes everything better.

I don't know what's going on with the wedding staircase cake but it is EPIC. I didn't see groomsmen; my first thought was it was for a same-sex marriage ceremony. But then there's that third guy sticking straight up, so...maybe they are groomsmen.

We need a whole lotta backstory on these cakes, people!

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterdutchgirl

He never thought the place promised way when on that cheery cakewas going to be prison. Like so many others, he'd assumed it meant McDonald's, because McDonald's was always hiring, and, well...you know. So he'd decided, if that was to be his fate, then he'd be the best, most cheerful employee they ever had. He practiced saying, "Do you want fries with that?" in a bright, upbeat voice several times a day. His family looked at him oddly, but he just KNEW he was on the right path.

Except it wasn't necessary, the fries line. It was obsolete. McDonald's did indeed hire him, although the supervisor seemed somewhat bored about it, not the gruff but ultimately good-hearted soul of his dreams. But the barely twenty manager told him that fries were automatically included in every meal, no need to ask.

Oops.

Who would have guessed that would've led him to ask, somewhat homicidally, over the barrel of a shotgun, whether or not the customer wanted EXTRA fries?!? And then jail for assault? And then prison, where you only got fries now and then?

Ah well, the cake was not a lie: you did go only one place.

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSaraCVT

So you could go either way? HAHAHA-

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterhaha

Are man biscuits the treats you use when training one?

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterjbrecken

I have never laughed so hard at a cakewreck post. I was chuckling at bi Evan but the groomsman falling made me laugh so hard I cried.

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAngela Castillo

"Whoa-oh here she comes/
Watch out, boys, she'll chew you up/
Whoa-oh here she comes/
She's a MAN BISCUIT eater!!!!"

(Little known first version of classic Hall & Oates Bakery song)

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterFM

ok, Looing at Cake # 6, I'm thinking cake for two grooms, not groomsmen. But how the grooms ended up at the bottom of the staircase, beats me.

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAddie

Oh no! What a wedding downer...

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterStoich91

That last one gives new meaning to the term "Face Plant" O.O

You guys are just awesome. Jen kicks us off with disturbing cakes and awesome commentary and everyone joins in to make things just that much more. Those lurkers who don't read the comments are totally missing out!

Welcome back @Gutz Gorilla!
Anybody seen @Just Andrea lately? Is she stuck on the moon babysitting @Haiku Joy's fondant babies?

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJodee

@justlurkin:
That "sounds" a lot like another song I've heard (and love)...Hmmm...
=^~.-^= ...and it makes me wonder...

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

@sendingtheclowns ~ I'm wearing a sweater today in the Westerly general direction. Since I'm about as far west as you can get and still be in the Continental US I'm hoping I'm pointed the right way. ;-)

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJodee

I have a true confession. I'm eating a fondant baby *right now.* It's feet-first for the little tyke because I'm saving the soft spot for last.

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

Origami mouse,
despite her flamingo knees,
banana split smiles.

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

@Jodee:
If you're IN the West, and POINTING West, then you can't be wearing it in my general direction because I'm in the East. Not to worry!--If you wear it far enough it will get to where I am, sooner or later. I think it would be nice if Craig were to weigh in, here, though. What's the worsted that could happen?
=^~.~^=

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

#1: It is either a subtle dig at the school system or an insult to the graduate. In other words, "You're not going very far".

#2st: @Craig: Your take on the Man Biscuits is hi-larious.

#3nd: Why do Minnie's hands look like Kermit's collar? Also, I think she is taking Yoga lessens from Gumby.

#4rd: That cake screams, "Meh", if that sentiment can actually be screamed.

#E: Yeah, yeah, but what about those other Men? Did they drown and someone placed flowers on the surface of the water? Has the sky fallen...underneath the flowers? Is it a cookie promoting Bluegrass music? They really thought we wouldn't notice those flower cookies are man-shaped?

#Last: They forgot to jump the vanishing step!

@drgns4vr: Well done! Teehee

@Jodee: Here I am! *waves energetically* I am a giant nerd and am throwing a Harry Potter Party with my family, so I've spent every spare minute making acceptance letter invites, Hogwarts Express tickets, a sorting hat, a ghost mirror, etc. : ) I've got one week to go! Thanks for thinking of me.

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJust Andrea

I love reading the wrecks every day, imagine my shock when on one of our local sites (not one I frequent) had an article entitled "That takes the cake: Weird baby shower cakes", needless to say all of the 21 cakes featured were straight off Cake Wrecks, attributed for sure, but still, using someone elses hard work. Keep up the good work!

http://www.essentialmums.co.nz/pregnancy/expecting/prepare-for-baby/8996401/That-takes-the-cake-Weird-baby-shower-cakes

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSelena

@Jodee: Belated congratulations on your raise! : - )

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJust Andrea

I hope Evan's coming out party turned out better than his cake, but for the jerk who called him a man biscuit, that was totally inappropriate.

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterpikkewyntjie

@SaraCVT whatever you're imbibing- I want some!! LOL
see, this is why we don't need no stinkin' backstory- we makes our own!

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara Anne

@Just Andrea - I want to come to your party!

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterzoomom

#5 First you get smashed by giant ice cream cone, next you're pushing uo daisies.
Last cake: yeah, we made the mistake of having a bar at our daughter's wedding reception. The ushers and groomsmen (and bridesmaids) all ended up in that condition, not knowing which end's up.

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLorie

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