Thursday
Feb072013
Killer Math
February 7, 2013 ;)
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Thanks to Alicia M. for reminding us to never cross a princess. Or anyone wielding a chainsaw.
February 7, 2013 
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What's a Wreck?
A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.
Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)
- Jen
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February 7, 2013 
Reader Comments (62)
Aurora solves her problems with a chainsaw... and she never has the same problem twice.
Is this a Carrie cake? If so, it is SPECTACULAR.
The sign of a true princess: She can go on a homicidal chainsaw killing spree without getting *any* blood on her dress.
Amy: I too thought perhpaps this was to celebrate a girl's first period....
Why don't you listen?
This could have been avoided.
I said, "MAKE IT BLUE!"
Nothing says 'princess' quite like blood and sprinkles.
You can have all of that for the low, low price of $25.99, what a bargain!
$23.99 ?!
What?! I don't even begin to understand this one!!
I don't see a chainsaw? Only her holding flowers.
Mostly, this cake just makes me say, "Huh??"
Is that cake actually priced at $25.99?
When it's obviously worth at least $34.72?
WTF where they going for ??? O_o
Haiku joy heheheh
Oh God! The blood is coming from under her skirt. Worst. Hemmorhagecake. Ever.
I have days like that...but with less sprinkles.
@Carla: Clearly she's already done away with the incriminating chainsaw, as all good princesses must. But I definitely have to add my voice to the chorus of "wth were they thinking??"
Yep - quite glad you didn't go with the more "natural" reason for the blood.
Given some of the recent turns they've taken with the story line in "Once Upon a Time", Topical Wreck is Topical... Heh...
Man, those corsets were *tii-ight*. Even when she's lost this much blood, she's still standing upright. Or is that her royal training?
This cake is made of pure awesome. That is all.
Aurora got pissed because everyone keeps making her wear the stupid pink dress instead of the blue dress it should be and went on a murderous rampage!
"Epcot" explanation: Her dress is BLUE the entire time she is wearing the ballgown in the Disney film! The ONLY time it is pink while it is actually on her is the last minute of the film (Pink! Blue! Pink! Blue! and fade out...). But for marketing purposes, Cinderella (whose "Princess" dress is actually more glittery white) was put in a blue dress, because to make her actual princess dress would a)cost too much and b)look too much like a wedding dress, of which she has a separate one they can sell. And god-forbid we have 2 blondes in Blue Dresses! No one will be able to tell them apart!! *insert heavy sarcasm here*
@Haiku Joy ~ Awesome as usual! I'm going to find a way to shout "MAKE IT BLUE" today... some how, some way!
@Caroline B ~ You and me both sister! o.O
@Sharyn ~ You have amazing math skills. I'm impressed X2 :)
Oh... there is plenty of blood, but no bodies? A-and... why does her s-skirt... look SO puffy?
Do you people agree that cake could go well with some of the examples from the previous post? (Especially the second last one.)
My eyes widened at the photo of the chainsaw, then I burst out laughing at the cake. Finally I gasped at the price. However I think the dress is holding her upright and her legs have been hacked off. The rivulets of blood are very nicely drawn, Wreckerator person.
Beginning of lost Grimm fairy tale: "Once upon a time an evil baker saw a princess...."
*SNORT* Hahahahahaha
Aurora: "It's only a flesh wound."
OR
The Pool of Bloody Evil (can I say that? Isn't Bl**dy a sort of curse word across the pond?), unsatisfied with even an hundred cotton candy unicorn hearts, sends its tentacles to capture the heart of its Valentine. Pool of Bloody Evil: "Aurora, will you be my Valentine? For. Eh. Ver!"
The ultimate dump cake...
@ Gutz Grilla
That's where all the bodies are.
Hmm, I suspect Aunt Flo is visiting.
OMG! All the dead fairies are floating in the pools of blood! Look at all the colorful little wings, drifting in knots of little fairy anguish!
Cheesus flippin' petes.
Well, this was obviously intentional, given the drips down the side and the way the sprinkles appear to be floating in the...(URG)... As to what the intention might be...?
Maybe this is what happens when a wreckerator takes sparse / cryptic notes and the cart wrangler has to fill in while said wreckerator is out with the Evil Bug. Or I can just go with Sharyn's theory. Anything to avoid...well, you know. (Shivers)
Wouldn't a princess have someone to do that for her? I'd certainly think she would have someone to do that for her.
I'm going to go read previous posts now. Surely there is some visual that will offset...this. Cinderella on a T. Rex. WIN.
Mimiheart wins the internet for her comment. Love the Arrogant Worms!
@Andrea Hi! I believe "bloody" as a curse word is a British thing. There is more info on Dictionary.com about that :-).
Looks like someone got their "monthly" on the big day. Yikes!
Maybe an otaku got confused and this was supposed to be Princess Resurrection cake! Hime, a lovely, blonde princess, does battle against the disobedient demons with a chainsaw.
But Hime would NEVER be caught wearing pink!
Hey, is this a PMS Wreck?
Yeah... um... Chainsaw soooo not what I got out of that. It looks like a really, really, I mean REALLY unfortunate "coming of age" cake. Really unfortunate.
I never realized how freakishly tiny Aurora's waist was until I saw that reference picture. Where does she keep her digestive system? The cake is frankly less horrific by comparison.
HURK. And THAT kids is why you never do math with chainsaws. Or cake. Or princesses.
I can't believe the price! $23.99? For this??
You had me at "Chainsaw."
Can someone please get Aurora a blue dress, Midol, and chocolate? STAT!
A new entry in the series: "Texas Chainsaw Princess"
And they want $27 for that!?!?!? Seriously???
Sleeping Beauty, they're all going to laugh at you!
I guess Prince Philip didn't make the cut....
The true crime is the price of the cake. $25!!!! for this hot mess!
Nobody else noticed that the - er - princess has severe jaundice? Maybe this is a Zombie Princess Apocalypse cake?
@k ROFL!! Guess Maleficent needs to worry more about Aurora & less about Philip!! :P