A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.
Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)
August 28, 2012 "Hello? Yes, I'd like to order a cake that looks like my husband's Audi. That's right, an Audi. And could you make it a nice coppery brown? Thanks!"
[Later that day]
;)
Alisha E., don't tell me that's not really what happened, because I choose to believe it is. So there.
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Reader Comments (54)
I would rather that be the case, I would hate to think that was done on purpose D:
Oh, god! That outie looks like quite a different hole in the human body, usually located on the other side...*hrrk!* ohhh there goes breakfast!
On a less disgusting note, they should've really washed those undies before wearing them; looks like the dye is starting to run ;)
Wow! Wierd seepage from the speedo. Think he may be Vulcan.
Sung to "Let's Call the Whole Thing Off" (Tomato, Tomahto)
I said, "An Audi."
You made an outie
I said, "It's awful."
You said, "It's pouty!"
Audi. Outie.
Awful. Pouty.
Let's call the whole thing off.
Sharyn hehehehehe
And how many people wear a bow tie with a bathing suit. And, Sharon, are you sure you want to call it off--think of what might be underneath!
1st time caller, long time cakewrecks.com stalker. I finally had to leave a comment because you failed to mention the very brown, well defined nipples. Wowza!
Ok- just out of curiosity- is that man wearing women's panties? they are not shaped for a man's body- and they have little black hearts all over them...
Which begs me to ask the question, is this a woman? The chest is quite rounded- unlike a mans? What is up with the bow-tie- and the speedo pantie seepage?
I think those things are worse than the audi.
The pecs(?) seem to have some sort of weird skin fungus.....
well...with no legs, we know he doesn't have Fiats....
Is that a Werther's candy for the belly button?? And those peanut butter chips for the nips?? Generally, it's caramel and chocolate sauce for body paint....
Why brown? There usually isn't that much difference in color between the stomach and the belly button. This looks like someone put a tootsie roll in their innie belly button. Which makes an even stranger story for a cake...
And the bow tie is awful. And the 3D hearts on the other garment.
Umm... Not to put too fine a point on it, but that's not a male body shape... Which takes the "disturbing" on this wreck to a whole NEW level... (shudder)...
Thank goodness that wasn't in "Magic Mike"!
Sharyn - well done! :-)
That's not an outie; that there's what we call a naple.
Besides the obvious... seriously, obvious.... wreckabilities mentioned... am I seeing a sliced up odd innie next to the outie?
I think we should 'wreck' whoever came up with spray color for icing. Does it really take that much effort to color icing? Are you truly never going to use that color icing again for another cake the same day? (considering the fact that these are 'professionally' done) I am continually amazed at the "oh, no, you didn't" moments that appear with spray color.
I knew it was going to show an outie belly button before I saw the pic! ;-)
Ew. Ew. Ew ew ew ew.
That is all.
My initial reaction was that the outie was a cut-up piece of hot dog. I'm going to work on convincing myself that it's a tootsie roll.
What the ??
Sharyn, brilliant as always! Thank you.
I haven't been cking in regularly for my "cakewrecks" fix, so, I may have missed something, but, has anyone heard from Craig lately? Hoping he's just on vacation....
khereva - lol!
I can't wait for my first opportunity to use "naple" in a conversation!
See, I didn't even get it because I don't pronounce Audi as Outie.. I pronounce it as Aw-di, the way they do in England. Nice of you to try to give the benefit of the doubt.
I prefer to see Homer Simpson with a bow on his head. He's scared because he's just been hit with the Densaugeo curse and is trying to hide his still-growing...uh, flesh-colored... buck teeth behind a bandana. There! No innies, no outies, no DISMEMBERED BODY....oh. I guess Homer has been beheaded, though. He's part of the Headless Hunt!
Perhaps it's a male stripper on estrogen...
Perhaps it's a female stripper on testosterone...
Either way, I fail to see how stuffing a cork in ones belly-button helps with hormonal issues.
It could be worse, that "Audi" could have been hiding in the speedo/panties.
**banging head on table** Seriously need some mental floss after this one!!
Wow. A male stripper who wears women's panties and is still carrying his umbilical cord stump after all these years. I'm swooning already!
Amanda and Sharyn: Thanks for making breakfast hilarious!
So many levels of wrongness. And seriously, does anyone know what the belly button is made from? I thought it was a wine cork at first, but the more I stared at it, the more I felt the need for eye bleach, so I stopped trying to figure it out.
Ok, been stalking a long while and just had to comment on this one.
From the perspective of a RN, this looks like a post surgical patient that had a double mastectomy with nipple reconstruction as well as a colostomy stoma.
Nothing, absolutely NOTHING about this cake is appetizing...major "fail."
@Trekkie Gal -- I think it's just a blob of the same icing they used for the nipples.
I'm with Marfie. Hot dog stump. I can't imagine what would come out if the stump was removed. Leaving now to dry heave.
@New England Flybaby: Craig's internet access is down at home, so he's stuck with the vagaries of public WiFi when he has the time. I'll send him a message and let him know you asked.
Oh, and it's Craig's birthday today, just FYI. (Maybe Theardare will let him out of the bunker...)
@Stephi-- I believe the fungus MAY be an attempt at chest hair ???
I'm so getting that for my hubby's next birthday.
Jacob Black really let himself go!
@mel: He also can't do deep knee Benz.
@Sharyn: Thanks for the update! Tell Craig Happy Non-Stalker-y Birthday from me!
Oh, and @mel? Snerk!
If that's what they do when you ask for an "Audi," I REALLY don't want to see what they'd do for a "Volvo."
For some reason, that belly button reminds me of a song from the early 90s by 20 Fingers. I don't think I can say the title of the song on this forum. But Googling it works. Especially if you add "featuring Gillette."
@Sharyn Thanks, I too was wondering what happened to Craig. Any info on Haiku Joy? We haven't heard from her either, in a long while.
@Craig HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! (whenever you get to see this) We hope Theadare hasn't been giving you a rough time.
Nice coppery brown, alright! It's probably a good thing that there is no head.
hmm, unless they haven't been approved yet there's no posts about John (thoJ)'s recent admission of his Vegas nom de plume...
@Sharyn business first- tell Craig I said "hippo birdie two ewes, hippo birdie two ewes, hippo birdie two ewes, deer, hippo birdie two ewes." now, that Volvo comment made me cry tears down my leg!!
Greetings from the bunker annex, brought to you by the vagaries (and schedule limitations) of public wi-fi. It's been an interesting month.
I finally get on here again, and this is what greets. At least it's not a baby cake. It is, however, yet another demonstration of the fact that 'could' and 'should' are not synonyms.
Theardare has been uncharacteristically quiet, I know, but he should be back in fine fettle any day. Just as soon as he finds out what a 'fettle' is. Sounds like something one would see on Cake Wrecks. But I digress.
Thanks, New England Flybaby, Sharyn and Andrea. It's good to be missed. (sniff...)
...and Ela and Barbara Anne. Posting sequence, din' ye ken.
I just had the most dreadful mental image of a cake bearing the 'hippo birdies' message. SO hoping that wreckorators don't read this site looking for ideas (though I suspect they do)...
@Craig -- Happy Birthday! Hope your internet is back up soon and your back here as usual!
hahahaha....that is pretty crazy. wow.
I had to take a second look to see what the outie was made out of.. and I am full of remorse lol. I don't think I want to know what was in the mind of the customer once they saw this cake. Other than throwing it at the wreckerator I really don't see them wanting to take it home. It scars and scares me lol.
Why... Dear God why?! Why is there poop in your husbands bellybutton and how did it get there?! *faints*
I know I'm a day late, but I just couldn't suppress...
Ode to Umbilicus
Coppery brown rectus sheath
Cannot hide what lies beneath
Towering above like a ficus
Out bursts Umbilicus!
Is it just odd omentum?
Is it part of the peritoneum?
Much larger in the presence of ascites
This wreck is no Aphrodite
Up above it gets more serious
Hard to tell if those mammaries are lactiferous
Oddly rounded pectoralis lays
This wreck could easily swing both ways
Innie, Outie
Volvo, Audi,
Umbilicus sure is rowdy!!
Awww. Happy Birthday Craig! We miss you! Give Theardare a big squish from me, even though he won't like it.
How did that even happen?? And what's up with the chest? 0_o
I've got to admit, I've never seen a cake that looks like it just underwent a Radical Mastectomy, and one done in Tijuana no less.
John