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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Wednesday
Jul042012

Go Fourth And Wreckerate!

You guys, I really don't know how to say this.

But...

.... here goes.

"Fourth OB July?"

"Fourth oh bee July?"

 Which is it?

 

Well, whichever, the important thing is that I wish you all a "Happ4" one, so here ya go:

And now that that's done, I'll let you get back to enjoying your celebratory afternoon picnics of roasted poo:

 

 Btw, how do you like your patties? Blackened or runny? 

(Either way, you're in luck!!)

:D

 

Happy fourth of July, everyone! Whether today's the day your country declared its independence, or it's just another Wednesday, I hope you have a "wreck-less" one.

 

Thanks to wreckporters Carlye, Cheryl P., & Catherine F. for helping me get all that out.

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Reader Comments (30)

It's a pity about that second one. I actually like the concept, and may have to refine it for the next time I get invited to a cookout.

July 4, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKatie

The first two cakes show what can happen when a bakery manager with a bad head cold gives instructions to the wreckerators: "I wand you to degorade a bunge of caigs with "4th ob July." God id? "4th ob July." Thangs."

Now, a patriotic ditty, sung to "I'm a Yankee Doodle Dandy"

Keep some extra OB's handy
For use on the 4th ob July
I was so hapless 'til I got that cake
Now I've got Happ 4 July!

Time for roasted doody sweetness
Watch the sugars carmelize
Wreckerators keep cakes handy
For their roast poo patties
All I can do is wonder why?

Happy 4th ob July!

July 4, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

Fourth ob July: The cake decorator has a cold.

July 4, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSue

Have a happy independence day

July 4, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

It seems like there are two fingers cooking in the last photo. I have to say it is a good concept and the "fire" airbrushing is pretty good.

July 4, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMellissa Rose

Wow. Now we can't even spell "of." I think it's going to take several extra festive holiday drinks to recover from that one!

Once again, Sharyn you amaze me with your talents. I wish I could function that well in the morning!

July 4, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTLC

It's too bad they don't teach cursive in school anymore. This is only the beginning.

July 4, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterFsurica

An OB looks more like a rocket or firecracker than any of the cakes from yesterday (but please don't light the fuse).

July 4, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterNaomi

That last one looked (to me) as if it was really glowing. Waaaay too much food color airbrushed on if it looks radioactive; and don't get me started on what that much coloring will look like on the way out! Blarg.

July 4, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJasry

??4th OB (appointment) in July??
is that like when you're the millionth customer somewhere and they give you balloons??

the last cake will haunt my dreams tonight.

July 4, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara Anne

I would have bought that last one if they had kept it to just coals and white marshmallows. Go 4th and enjoy this Wednesday.

July 4, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTeabunny

Agreed on the praise for the concept of the last cake. The hot coals are excellent, and the roasted marshmallows are pretty good, if out of scale with the rest of the "food." Now we need to work on the burgers and dogs, and the piped icing around the perimeter.

Cake-maker, if you're reading this: If you can do those coals, you can get the rest of it down too! I have faith in you! In fact, may I suggest you try a campfire variation as well? I think it would look awesome. (Just don't use piped fudge or chocolate icing to make logs or sticks. As any regular visitor to this site could tell you, it won't turn out well.)

July 4, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMonica

I agree about that last one. The marshmallows and burgers/weiners may be burnt but those coals truly look like they're glowing!

July 4, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterkayk

The good news, if it IS good news, is that none of them tried to spell "Independence (Day)." I can just imagine the Wrecky results ...

Indepents Dag
Indepants Day (oh, the possibilities...)
Indecence Day

Etc., etc. Oy!!

July 4, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJules

How did they know I had my 4th appointment with my OB yesterday. Do I get a cake for each appointment? Because, you know, I'm pregnant, and could definitely go for more cake.

July 4, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLizzyland

Have a happy Fourth ob July..."ip du tan!"

July 4, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLindaLu

Be grateful: none are CCCs.

July 4, 2012 | Unregistered Commentergobbler

I'm not sure what they were going for on the second cake... why write it all scrunched up in the corner and leave the rest of the cake blank? "Enquiring Minds Want To Know!"

Sharyn, brilliant as always!

Jules, your In The Pants Day made me giggle!

July 4, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDegera

The whole concept of OB and yesterday's firecrackers...but then would you be taking OB on as a sponsor? ;-)

July 4, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKaren

no jokes today or bad puns (or course, there are no bad puns...)...just celebrating one of my favorite freedoms...the freedom to play on this site...Happ 4 of July to you Jen, john (thoj) and all the wreckies on this playground....it just doesn't get any better than this! Thanks!

July 4, 2012 | Unregistered Commentermel

Oh man now they can't spell of?? What's next the misspelling of the word an? Lol what will they think of next. That last cake despite the poo dogs looks almost edible especially the yummy marshmallows.

July 5, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

#2 The 'y' shortage continues with no signs of abating. No one can even ask about it -- the question just comes out, "wh-?"

#3 Yes, if you want to be sure to avoid food-borne illness, just drop the meat right in the coals. None of this "internal temperature of 160" stuff -- that's for wimps. Let's see you survive 1600 degrees, Salmonella! Anyone knows that 'done' is short for 'done being identifiable as food'.

July 5, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

Airbrushed marshmallows never looked so hot! Not sure I'd like the taste (and as Jasry said, it's probably not too healthful), but it opens up a lot of possibilities for wreckeration!

July 5, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSylph

Since the wreckerator was going for such an authentic look on that last cake, as evidenced by the glowing embers, why did they spray paint the marshmallows black? Wouldn't it have made more sense to actually roast the marshmallows and put them on the cake?

July 5, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLiza

Hey, at least the 4th OB July cake didn't have a firecracker on it. Especially a red one. That wick would make it look a little too close to home...

July 5, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMelonie

I actually would like the last one if it didn't have poo patties and...dear lord, are those severed burnt fingers??!! It's a lesson on how (not) to decorate a cake, roast marshmallows and ignite fireworks all in one cake!

July 5, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterG-Baby

Burning coals look great --radioactive one could say. Am I the only one who thinks the hot dogs look slightly pornographic and and the hamburgers look like poo piles?

July 5, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMarla

Those first two make sense if you read them in a Filipino accent. Except then it would have to be "Pourth ob July" (hey, stop throwing things at me... my husband's Filipino).

July 6, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterbuffy

GEEZ, this is funny! My God, tho...can't anyone spell words anymore? Or recognize things that look like turds? OB? REALLY??? Ok, this deserves it...these bakers are the biggest mooks I've ever seen! (I'm just gonna make sure Parent #2 doesn't see that...I got that word from Timon! He may have only said it once in the movie, but he's also said it on House of Mouse, and it was said at least once in almost every episode of the TV show Timon & Pumbaa. Parent #1 approves. Parent #2 doesn't approve. And there are reasons to not give away which parent is which here!!!)

July 11, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMeaghan

The "OB" is an O with a lowercase cusive "F"!

July 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAnna

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