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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Tuesday
Aug092011

The World's Most Unfortunate Wedding Monogram 

Some couples look for a sign that their marriage will last.

 

 This isn't it.



Thanks to Ruth H. for the initial discomfort.

 

Note from john: For those you you who may not know, usually "DOA" stands for "Dead On Arrival."  Less common meanings are "Dead Or Alive", "Date Of Arrest" and the ever-popular, "Darkener Of Apricot."

« And They Say Motherhood Has No Rewards | Main | D'OH! »

Reader Comments (69)

...I don't get it.

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJess

My husband and I have the combined initials of KKK - no monogrammed white towels for us...

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKelly

How on earth did they miss that?!

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLauren Grace

I don't get it either. Is it "Dead on Arrival"? "Department of Administration"?

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

There's a marriage that ain't gonna last long! LOL oy mama!

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermarie

Hee Hee...good thing their not superstitious! Dead on Arrival...oh, my, Jen, how did you restrain yourself?

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterWendy

Great, now I'm going to have the sing stuck in my head for the next hour. :)

Btw John, my load time was much faster today!

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLeahR

Seems like they could have switched the initials... AOD wouldn't have raised any eyebrows.

Kelly- your comment was a super LOL (:

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda Cullen

This is why I never got serious with a guy who had a last name that started with S. Then my initials would be A$$

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTexasBlueEyes

Either English is not their first language, or they did it deliberately and proudly so that they could be featured on CW. Looks like yummy chocolate, at least!

Awwww, I miss the wv!

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterbassgirl

I made it a point to find a guy with the same last initial so I wouldn't have to change mine. :)

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLizard

*facepalm* How did no one see this?!

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTheBlackDog

My ex-husband's sister didn't realize her daughter's monogram is "STD" until somebody monogrammed something for her. Gotta be careful about those things! lol

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKati

It's not THAT obvious. Who goes around with a memory full of acronyms??

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSillyBilly

my, that's unfortunate!

unless it's a funeral cake.....

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterjo

maybe the father of the bride is in the mob and it's a threat to his new son-in-law...

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterhmm

Other equivalents...STD, HIV

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnna B

Just as long as they aren't paramedics or Emergency Room staff!

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAliza

Well throw some flowers on that tombstone and ... oh, they already did.

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJanice

As long as it isn't a warning label of what you will be "if" you eat the cake! Do you think that chocolate is laced with laxatives?

@Kelly - maybe just stick with the one K monogram - his/hers/ours it works LOL!

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKristen

Oh my. I don't know if I'd even want to eat a cake labeled that way. What's in it?

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterStephanie

maybe if the bachelor or bachelorette parties get a little crazy...

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJessy

With a monogram, the middle letter should be taller than those on either side. Had that been done, I don't think the acronym would have been quite as obvious. Instead the wreckorator produced a "D" that is almost as tall as the "O" and an "A" that is physically shorter and, thanks to the stylized font, looks shorter still.

Another sizing solution could have been to put the monogram on the opposite side. If the "A" were on the shorter end of the sloping bottom tier, it would have produced the illusion of uniform letters.

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJane

wv
R.I.P.
2008-2011

word verification quietly passed away on Friday, August 5, 2011, after a brief but fun run on the Cake Wrecks blog site. A mystery so some (what’s this wv?) and a delight to many, it brought an added dimension of humor to an already hilarious site. For some it was the frosting on their comments. I loved wv, and found it stretched my mind in ways I didn’t think possible (or desirable, at times….). I only passed on one: peenes. It was a hard decision, but I thought, I’m not gonna touch it. I wasn’t afraid of the outcome – I knew nothing would come of it, but in a rare moment of better judgment, I kept my hands off. (Funny, I did feel blue afterwards….)
So here’s to you, wv. Thanks for that extra opportunity to indulge in some mental gymnastics, for another chance to chuckle, and for supplying us with a fun way to get our MDRS (Minimum Daily Requirement of Silliness).
wv is survived by it’s relative CAPTCHA, and thousands of fans.

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermel

*Darkener of apricot*

For some reason, that made my day. :)

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermichelej

That's why I won't monogram things for my daughter - it spells "ARF"

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAlly

Ignoring the initials for a moment... what happened with the polka dots? The top row is evenly spaced, then each subsequent row becomes more chaotic. Did they try to place the dots randomly and fail? Did the wreckerator not have anything with a straight edge (such as a knife or a spatula or the side of a square cake pan) to use as a guideline? Ah well. Stick some flowers on it and call it a day.

Years ago, Conan O'Brien told a story about buying a monogrammed photo album for his parents' anniversary. He ended up with a gorgeous leather-bound volume... with "ROT" embossed on the cover.

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterNaomi

Here in Iowa, they recently renamed the Department of Elderly Affairs...to the Department of Aging. This must be the cake from the ceremony.

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJennifer

Boy, I like the ever-threatening Darkener of Apricots. The menace in that sends chills right up and down my cottage cheese salad.

They could have made it a little better if they had done small his first intital LARGE LAST INITIAL small her first initial.

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterdrgns4vr

Maybe they have a macabre sense of humor and/or are proclaiming to the world their complete lack of belief in jinxes. It could also be an attempt to preempt the inevitable gag gifts (monogrammed black towels, etc).

In my case, the wedding monogram as traditionally constructed would be my initials (her first initial and my middle and last are the same). I can hear it now: "Ok, that must be the groom's cake. Where's the wedding cake?"

I see we have another 'Craig' on the board now. Welcome.

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

Kudos to Mel for the eloquent eulogy for wv. It will be missed....

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermiss_paper

Um. Wow.
Truely a monumental wreck.
I just did my first wedding cake for non-family/non-friends... and the entire time my mantra was "as long as it doesn't end up as a CW, I'm good." LOL

I love your blog, and I'm amazed each and every day at what some so-called professionals churn out!

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered Commentersnapshotstacy

There is a remote possibility that husband and wife both collect Asian ball jointed dolls. DoA is the acronym for the online forum Den of Angels. Or, if you turn it around to AoD, you get an Asian ball jointed doll company named Angel of Dream. Better than the alternatives!

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLorraine

Oh Mel, you made me cry...

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

A loose translation from Portuguese to English, "Doa" stands for "May it hurt".

"Doa" is from the verb "Doer" that means "To hurt". Appropriate, no? :D

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMJ

I miss wv too.. thanks for the WV obituary Mel.... Funny cake!

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterNo Cake Fo' You!!!

Yeah no "Dead on arrival" cake at my ceremony! My daughter is getting married in less than 2 years and her fiance's last name begins with an O and their monogram is ROB or BOR. No monogrammed cake for them either! LOL

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterGamecockMom

We got a wedding invitation from my husband's cousin and at the top were the beautifully embossed initials "KKK." My husband said his cousin (the bride) most likely had no idea of the connotation. I wish they would have incorperated it into their cake.

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMe

the initials are least of the worries....that 'frosting' job looks like somebody slapped on duncan hines with a butter knife and piped on some cake mate frosting in the tube....the flowers from michaels on the top are a nice touch ;P

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered Commentererika

Oh yeah. I *totally* thought of "Darkener of Apricots" when I first saw "DOA" on the cake. Didn't everybody?? ;)

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered Commentersariah

Some friends who recently got married included their monogram on their invite. It read: a S s

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAlicia

We didn't use a monogram, because it would have been RIP!

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterPamlin

I almost thought it was a groom's cake…and when I clicked on it I expected to see a Wife statue dragging her DOA man behind her!

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAndrea

as a cake decorator (please let that never become "wreckerator" I just can't believe nobody tried to talk the happy couple out of using their initials... sometimes they're just not pretty together... sometimes the cake style doesn't work with big honking letters... and sometimes they spell doom and gloom for the happily wedded couple :)

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTisforTonya

My husband was going to be named Christopher Owen Douglas, until a helpful relative pointed out that his initials would be COD!

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKaren

Kelly you made my day!
The wv obit was great, didn't know what that was til then, so thanks!
Janice LOL!

I live next door to a Nicaraguan church group, who we "affectionately" call the "Army of Darkenss" or AOD...this could possibly work as well, no? LOL

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterprotojew62

No one told you life was gonna be this way...
Your cake's a joke, it's broke
Your wedding's DOA!

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSteve the Pocket

Okay, I don't know what's funnier- the cakes, or your witty comments about them. I have never laughed so hard in my entire life at some of the things you have on your site, and my teens think they're hilarious, too. Thanks so much for posting- keep up the good work!

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterChana M. Johnson

My Initials after marrying are PMS- not something I want to see monogrammed anywhere. But if it were, a giant chocolate cake would be the most appropriate.

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSlice

My husband's and my dual monogram is STD if we put his initial first, so needless to say, we are DTS all the way!

August 9, 2011 | Unregistered Commentercoffeeandshoes

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