Friday
Jun242011
Swing and a Miss
June 24, 2011 NOTE: Today's post may not be appropriate for young children who understand double entendres.
Look, I'm not going to say I'm proud of what I first saw when I looked at this cake, butt...
Ok, I'm a little proud.Also, dad's ball seems a little low.
Speaking of which, go ahead: tell me this placement wasn't intentional:
And maybe I'm out in left field here, but don't you usually tend to see this kind of thing around third base?
Still, at least that baker has actually seen a baseball bat before. This one seems to have confused it with some kind of joystick:
And in related news, something something "some kind of joystick."
See? These jokes practically write themselves.
Ah. I see the force is strong with this one:
Show off.
Also, is that a Chef's hat, or a pile of poo? 'Cuz I can't make heads or tails of it.
And finally, men, do you experience a burning sensation when you go?
...to bat, I mean? Go to bat?
Thanks to Adria P., Amy U., Stephanie D., A. R., Denise H., and V.D. for that last joke.
Reader Comments (72)
That last cake... the last one...Oh, Oh, Oh.... I have to wash my eyes.
Oh noooo.
Really, I still can't get the image out of my head. I can't close my eyes! Singing "It's a Small World" doesn't help with visions. Help me.
That last one... my eyes are still burning.
WHY IS IT SO SHIN???
And those candles sticking out of it.
WHY, why???
Swing and a Mister, if you please.
Shiny. I meant to say, "why is it so shiny." See how upset I am.
This post took a lot of balls.
While I can come up with no explanation for most of these masterpieces, I think the chef's hat/pile of poo is actually the Hamburger Helper "Helping Hand" mascot's evil twin. (You can tell by the parsley garnish.)
Also, I DON'T WANT TO KNOW what kind of butterfly the caterpillar in the last cake turns into.
LOL! On The Force cake, I guess you can tell which side is north by the moss growing on "the log". Either that, or someone needs a shot of penicillin!
"And VD for that last joke."
BEST line of the post lol, which is an accomplishment, since the whole post was funny.
*Blink*
*Stare*
*Blink Blink*
*Rubs eyes*
Pass the Eye Wash, SuBee!! I'm about to go to bed and I'm pregnant. I do not need the dreams that may follow the viewing of today's... Ahem... Bats. And don't worry. When cake is this awkward, it can totally be Shin... On that note, I have got to make someone a cake like these, just to see them squirm.
Hahaha this blog makes my day.
WV: Kedia (And once again, WV defeats me. Somebody toss me a line here!)
Dan probably would have been happier if they'd turned his cake the other way around. You know, so the "bat" was pointing up.
"joystick." I snorted.
@Jenniffer: I was also thinking something along the lines of penicillan, but more in the vein "Do Not Want to play with that particular joystick."
@ elissa "in the vein"! penecillin in the vein! LOL so much funny.
That last one looks so...unhealty.
I don't know when the last time I had a desire to take a dump on a baseball field was. Actually... it's been, since, well... I've never had that particular urge, but if I ever do, I'm pretty sure I won't stick candles in it. WTH? How did anyone think that looked like anything else?
WV: sycombe I don't think I will ever sycombe to the urge to eat poo cake.
I see that someone
confused "birthday suit" with " - cake,"
needs dicktionary.
Chef's hat?? I thought that was a poo-couch. A very fancy one, too!
WHAT WERE THEY THINKING?! D: And VD??? Really???
And what are those little pink things all over the final "poo-bat" cake? Are they supposed to be people? Worms? What?
National Lewd Cake Day?
I'll add it to the rest. :)
Wonderful post.
mocking
The last cake: VOMITS FRESHLY INGESTED BREAKFAST
*Standing* *Applauding*
Bravo! Bravo!
Exellent narration today!
Now I have to go acid wash my eyes!
LOL...you've tickled my double entendre mind....and for a swell (snicker) time, enlarge (snicker) the last cake picture...it really comes into full (snicker) focus....
Keep it up!!! (I mean the funny, funny blog....)
wv - tureact: it is impossible not tureact to these cakes....
On the first cake, I see the baseball being in mid-flight, and Dad's going to have one hell of a contusion on his keister!
Presumably-- yes, yes, I know what it means to ass-u-me -- the bakery has food colouring. (unless they actually get large canisters of icing in all the rainbow colours)
Why do these bakers assume that one standard "brown" works for all shades?
I'm going to guess that if I left that last "bat" on the baker's doorstep, his first thought would be neither "who left this icing here?" nor "why would someone leave a baseball bat?".
Yes, you guys managed to outdo yourselves again. And I thought as a seasoned cake wreaks fan I could be trusted with a cup of coffee whilst viewing. Now my eyes and my monitor need washing.
ok, putting candles into the poo...will not make the cake any more appetizing.
And what does a baseball have to do with a police billy club...and a moldy blues clues thinking chair??? :P
Holy Jeebus! I'm gonna go raunchy here...that last cake? It looks like it went in for a home run but came out with a BIG swing and a miss. BIG miss. And the lady (or man, I don't judge) got taken totally by surprise and...and..well..you know what she (or he) did.
WHERE do you FIND this crap??!!
Only a guy (~~and a baseball-obsessed, colorblind, and lobotomised one, at that) could even consider appreciating these abject failures.
Regarding Dan's uh, *endorsement*...if someone got as far as third base with me and then started swinging THAT thing at me, I'd be the one running for home.
"Louisville Slugger," indeed...
=^>.<^=
That last one is SO BAD. I feel like a little part of my cake-loving soul just died.
Anyway, the impotent* thing to remember is:
It really is just cake!
Close your eyes, make a wish, pucker up and blow. =^~.-^=
*not a typo
Jen, I'm so proud you got your sports analogies right!
WV: miankini
I don't think Dan would be able to fit in a miankini ;)
Some kind of joystick, indeed.
"Something something... 'some kind of joystick'" I just about spewed when I lol'd!
Also: the commenters are just ON today!! :)
what the slimy hell is that last one supposed to be.....Yeah, those were all real bad!!! *eyes burning*
wv: Those wreckoraters LASILY put those awful cakes together....
Love them!
How does the bakery not say, "Gee... pretty much looks like a _______. Let's start over."??
Take me out to the ballgame, but please don't poop on the field.....
There aren't enough candles in the world to make that last "bat" look like anything but poo........
Laughing... SO funny! This is a good day, Jen. A VERY good day! :)
That last cake was painful to see. It made me throw-up a little in my mouth. Agreed with SuBee: "MY EYES!!!"...what were they even trying to do? What IS it??? ugh.
Lol. Great blog today!!
That last one....WOW. A glistening pile o' poo. One could scrape that off, put it in a brown paper sack and set it on fire on someone's doorstep. Hey! Maybe that's why the candles were stuck in it!
Rachel
LMAOOOOOO Third Base!!! LMAOOOOOO!!
Thanks for the Friday laughs!
That last cake. That bat just doesn't need swung, anywhere.
The rest of them are, uh, very sporting. Yeah. Sporting.
Come on, guys. It's difficult to poop out a baseball like that. Let's cut the guy some slack. Better yet, let's BUY him some slacks.
Me: *How do people not notice this kind of thing...*
-Scrolls to last cake-
Me: AAAAAAAAARGH!!!! BRAIN BLEACH!!! BRAIN BLEACH!!!
That last cake looks like a monster from Godzilla - those caterpillar looking baby Mothra things - attacking a little league game. I imagine the candles are the kids... heh.
Re Cake #4: OK, am I truly the only one who has been reading this blog long enough to understand that the wreckerator was going for a catcher's mitt in the lower right corner? That's a scary thought. Although I don't know why he or she felt the need to put grass on it... (And it really does look like a moldy Blues Clues thinking chair, giggle, chortle, *snort*)
I Don't Know...THIRD BASE!
Well I guess he's the world's greatest dad 'cuz he's got a nice butt. O.o
or
It's a sarcasm cake because I don't think the world's greatest dad would moon everyone.
Just put that last cake in a paper bag, light the candles, and leave it on the wreckerator's doorstep.
wv: easit. Easit does it: not according to these cakes!
Apparently I'm not too good with the double entendre. So my reading went like this, *read, look at picture, reread, look at picture* *pause* "AAAACCKKK!"
wv: shfort
SHFORT!!!!! -- the exact sound that exploded from my vocal cords at great volume when I saw today's wrechs!