Wednesday
May182011
Picture This
May 18, 2011 Sometimes you want your cake to match your party invitations. Hey, no biggie, right? I mean, bakers do this all the time! So, just bring in the invite...
[Picture removed]
(Photo removed at the request of the baker. Please enjoy this lovely picture of Epcot)Mmmm. Magic.
And you must admit: no body makes it better.
Or say you have a specific item you want replicated in cake.
You know, like a camcorder.
(Really?)
(Oh. Ok. Really.)
Well, no problem. They can do that, too!
That's one for the record books.And with all the company picnics out there, you know bakers can freehand logos like nobody's business:
See? Just like nobody's business!Or how about trying an entire building?
It's all in the airbrush.Enough business, though. What do you say we loosen things up with something a little... sexy?
Mrow.
Uh...Well, on the bright side, at least the baker was generous with the serving sizes!
Because anything less would have been a waist.
Thanks to Anony M., Hannah I., Emily C., Bridey, & another Anony. And hey, you know what they say! "A moment with these hips on your lips, and your hips...I mean, your LIPS...no. Wait. Look. There's an old saying in Tennessee. Or was it Taiwan? Anyway. Fool me once, shame on..uh...look, you can't get fooled again, is what I'm saying. Sooo. Yeah.
[dramatic eyebrow lift]
Strategery.
Reader Comments (95)
I really fail to understand the continuing popularity of the pregnant torso cakes. I mean, I see them all over this site, and more keep coming, which means that bakers keep baking 'em, which means that people ordered them. I don't get it. I just don't get it.
Punny. :3
They tried . . .
How sad that, instead of attempting the profile in the invitation, just done with icing, the wreckerator felt compelled to do the built-up, facing-right-at-you pregnant body.
Ummmm....wow. I'm speechless today!
"Strategery."
Winning. Favorite SNL sketch ever.
Poor Marlene....
:)
I think your normal wreckiness has finally begun to effect me. I found myself thinking "Well, this one's not all that bad," which it clearly is! But I've been wreck-desensitized! It's madness, I say!! :)
Has the wrecerator for the last cake ever SEEN a woman before? Wow.
The baker of the first cake needs to remember "2D good, 3D bad"; at least for their skill set.
I agree with Jenni. The first cake wasn't thaaat bad (except for the kermit the frog hands). However, I don't think I would eat a piece of the rusty building cake. Blech.
CC
I'm kinda impressed (snicker snicker) with the building cake. I mean look at the shading on the building. How it goes from light to dark as you look left to right.
Now all we need is that painter guy who paints the "happy little trees" and we're all set!
1.: "A PEARL IN THE MAKING"??? That cake looks like someone who has terrible idigestion from eating oyster SHELLS. OY(ster)vey!
2.: The *camcorder* resembles something I've seen on the evening news from the reporters in Afghanistan. What are they called, now? Tanks?
3.: 39 million pounds. (+!!!) A stripey heart and a funny-looking leaf thingy.
Well. Who WOULDN'T know what it's referring to, I ask you.
4.: Let's play fair, okay? the photo is at street level. The wrecklica is from above, like it was photographed from a helo. Of COURSE it will look different--the colors, the shape...the prehistorically giant foliage in the background...picky, picky, picky!
5.: "What do you say we loosen things up..." you ask?
Seemingly, they did just that; the cake's, er, "hips" are about as loosey-goosey as a roasting turkey. SEX-EE. (GrrrrOW!)
Love the amputated look there, too.
(Nothin' says lovin' like somethin' from the...guillotine? Axe murderer?)
I fold--no deal. =^-.-^=
That building looks like the hospital where my daughter was born. If so, they really could have done better- Martha Stewart lives 20 minutes from there.
Thank you for the quote from the Wreckerator in Chief. It made me shudder for a minute, then I remembered he's gone!
OMG I am so twisted I thought the actual camcorder was on the cake and that's what the wreckerator did...I need help!
OMG who told those "bakers" they had any talent???
Dear [deity], if I didn't know you were sticklers to the pro thing I'd assume those were all amateur jobs for sure. I am still stunned at the hubris of so many people saying, "Sure, I can make that, if you pay me!" and then turn out such junk.
Someone save that poor pregnant lady from the frog with the wandering hands!
I love that the last one was made entirely out of heart-shaped cake pans. "Genius."
And a pearl starts with an itch ...
To be later extracted with a knife.
Okaaay.
Marleen: Body by Cake?
You know, right about now edible paper isn't sounding so bad.....
Andrea
Props for the closing GWB reference.
I'll have a drumstick off of that last cake ...
That first one is quite something. No head, no legs, no arms or hands (just sleeves and gloves). Maybe the baby was conceived in vitro and farmed out to a surrogate womb? Because ...
I too must be developing a high tolerance of the ridiculous with cake. Initially, with that first cake,I thought aside from Kermit getting handsy, it wasn't that bad.. then I looked at it again.. yeesh
I am a bit bothered by pregnancy = "a pearl in the making". Mostly as pearls are made by the oyster coating a small piece of debris to make the pearl. So, the fetus is a piece of debris...? Depending on your point of view..this is oddly appropriate.
that camcorder looked like more of a vehicle, and vava voom... look at the hips on that last cake.... *licking lips* no seriously, those were really really bad....
Posting solely because my WV is "wastel", which makes me think of Mr. Strategery. Hehehe...
GWB FTW!
That... Wow. I understand that it's hard to make cake out of certain things (if you're not on that show), but if you know you're not great at it, why not tell your customer? I know if I were pregnant and full of hormones, that cake would make me cry!
Ava
Eek.
That is all.
WV - corce:
"A-corce we kin make that! Shewt! Ain't no problem, atall!"
Sorry, had to do it. :)
As an employee of the San Francisco Food Bank, I feel like some clarification might help here. This cake was from our end-of-year party last June and 39 million pounds represents the amount of food we distributed in San Francisco during the year. Out of context, it makes very little sense at all, but we're pretty proud of what we do. And for the record, the general consensus that day was that this cake was a perfect candidate for CakeWrecks. :)
#1 "It's not easy being green..." It's not easy looking at that cake, either.
#2 At least they didn't just put the picture on a sheet cake. Though that might have been better.
#3 Over 39,000,000 pounds??? Really? That's 19,500 tons. Quite an achievement... The border is doing a disturbingly convincing impression of parsley.
#4 E for effort. I mean, someone who had no idea what the original building looked like (apart from the wreckerator, that is) would probably be pleased. The arbitrary rearrangement of the landscaping shows creativity. Or a limited selection of flotsam. (Are those trees sanitary?)
#5 MarLeen should never have ordered a cake from the bakery owned by her arch-rival.
Haha SERIOUS, re: camera "look alike" cake: What is it? WHAT IS IT! Do you think that it might single-handedly take over the world? Maybe? It looks like a robot that comes alive at night, or something...
Duff Goldman and Friends have a lot to answer for. They made making 3-D replica cakes look easy, so now anyone thinks they can do it.
That first cake says Mc=Kenzie. Someone has actually possibly heard E=MC2 and still can't make body parts to scale. That is one busty baby mamma with tiny flat hands. Yikes.
That company logo...there's a simple way to get the exact design you want. Basically, you trace it onto wax paper with piping gel and transfer it to the cake. I learned it at the elite culinary institute of Wilton Cake Decorating. Week two.
Also, I kind of did a double-take on the first cake because I assumed it was going to be a wedding invitation...but then she was pregnant. It took me a second to realize it was a baby shower invite. xD
The first cake would have been a Wreck no matter how it was done thanks to that ugly invitation so I really can't place all the blame on the decorator. I've always thought pastel pink and pastel green made a nauseating color-combination, and the headless pregnant torso with black gloves does nothing to flatter it.
That first cake looks like somebody put a dress on the Venus of Willendorf!
On the other hand, I think the camcorder cake may have shot down my fighter in Battlestar Galactica Online last week....
I don't do blogs bc its a waste of time, but I had to comment after someone told me they saw this. First of all I don't think anything is wrong with the first cake and secondly that cake was created 2 years ago for the person who says why to people keep creating these cakes. The person who sent this picture did so to be malicious and petty. And futhermore I was pleased with the cake and at the end of the day that is all that matters! and it tasted great. So to each its own and we all have a own opinions and like they say opinions are like ..... I don't have to finish the rest.
The arms!! The arms on the mommy torso are piped frosting. Scary!
I don't like the new torso trend for baby showers. Give me duckies any day.
The building must have suffered a lot of smoke damage in the fire. And yet, it's still standing. Yay! Let's have cake!
Compared to some of the wrecks I've seen on this site.... I think these decorators did a pretty nice job!
Argh. I always get annoyed with myself when I'm slow to check the blog one day and I end up with an Epcot picture. I bet that first cake was hilarious.
Camcorder cake looks a little too joyless to get excited about...but corset cake, on the other hand, might be a little too exciting!
wish I'd seen the prego cake but I have a good image from the comments. maybe "good" is the wrong word- insert "clear" instead...
-Barbara Anne
for the "wreckerd" books? ;)
Awww man, I always hate it when the "cake baker" requests you take down the photo. Have a sense of humor already, we can't help it if your cake sucks...we just want to laugh! :) Love your site!
Ok no fair, I didn't get to see the first cake photo...Wait, am I really complaining about not seeing a bad cake? Wow, interesting. What has the world come to? *looking around*
oh.
Strategery.
My husband would say that the building cake is the difference between what an architect sees (the actual building) and what happens after the developers and contractors get their hands on it (the cake).
FYI for all u ignorant people pink and green are colors of the first And biggest African American Sorority. Pearls are known for scared reason within this sorority. And phrase Pearl in the making has something to do with an unborn child developing into a pearl so dont make fund of something u all know nothing about. And that was done without Fondant Which that is what the buyer requested. So that cake had a deeper meaning than just a pregnant lady on a cake. And the invitation tis black art which I'm sure u all don't know anything about either. U people ( and i use that term u people) are so opinionated on these blogs and cowards in person. u people get on my nerves.