Thursday
Sep302010
Cake Secrets
September 30, 2010 "My boss made me sweep the floor, even though I didn't make the mess. So I swept up, and then made her a special cake...
"...which somehow got set out for sale.""You know that third time I asked you to spell 'congratulation' for me?
"I was totally messing with you."
"My watch is in there.""Sometimes I like to draw vaguely obscene things on cakes...
"...and then tell your kids they're Oompa Loompas."
"I've never seen Star Wars.""I told you it was a grill, but to be honest...
"I don't know what this is, either."Oh, and I licked the spoon."
"I really, really, REALLY....
"...don't like kids.""I told my managers it'll never happen again, but...
"...wait'll they see where I put Snow White!"Oh, and if you guys like Post Secret, check out Frank's tour schedule; he may be coming to a city near you!
Reader Comments (143)
Next year I'm getting Cinderella riding a T-Rex on my birthday cake.
Suzanne that is exactly what I was gonna say!!
SuBee I snorted out loud. What the heck IS that thing anyway?!! Majorly failed anatomy lesson plus chicken pox?
One of the funnier things in the post is the little "Cleaning Instructions" on the window:
"Clean with clean water or damage to food product will occur.."
Um.. Sort of scary that someone has to be TOLD to use clean water to clean..
WV: disesses; What you might get if you don't use clean water to clean.
i find the cinderella/t rex cake intriguing, however it looks to me as though cindy is to be sacrificed to the volcano god.
i don't know...
wv: publesua???
The obscene one? If you squint it kind of looks like two people holding two lightsabers fighting bigfoot. Maybe?
I think #7 are the ghosts from PacMan. In the 80's cartoon, they all wore hats. It's just a guess, and it doesn't justify the cookie dandruff on the blue one.
I need to know what #4 is. I can't move on.
LOVE Cinderella and T-Rex!
I think that's the best cake I've ever seen!
I think #7 are the ghosts from PacMan. In the 80's cartoon, they all wore hats. It's just a guess, and it doesn't justify the cookie dandruff on the blue one.
I need to know what #4 is. I can't move on.
My 8yo son saw the cinderella jockey cake and said "Wow, that is a COOL cake Mom!" LOL
Funniest post in awhile! So many WTF is that?? cakes, and I love the angry muppet heads and Cinderella riding the T-rex! Awesome!
I swear I thought those mean looking mini-cakes were labeled "bittercream"
Cinderella riding the dinosaur is the most awesome thing ever.
Our 4YO's birthday is coming up next month, and she would love it! It combines two of her favorite things: princesses and giant, bloodthirsty reptiles (it's a small kid thing).
If I can possibly manage it, I'm going to do my best to reproduce this for her birthday.
"The Princess and the T" = WIN
wv: pupects = Do I need to get out the pupects and spell it for you?
Thanks for real true belly laughs this morning!!! My bellies needed them--brain did too. Cinderella, Rex Wrangler, just plain gives me hope.
And I had to make some snorty noises out of my nose. MOST EXCELLENT....
Wv: menestr. OK, I can take a hint. "Father, if it evolves into a smack down between T Rex and Cinderella, then T Rexy and the Little Mermaid or finally the big T-ster against
Paris Hilton, who would the Bishop back??!
Okay, like every other little girl born in the last 50 years or so, I grew up watching Cinderella. I love that movie, but it would have been totally better one of Cinderella's little mice friends got turned into a dinosaur and eaten the evil step mother/sisters.
And I totally didn't get the Sesame Street thing until I read other people's comments. Heh. I guess I need to spend more time tending my nephews.
wv: waters (really!) You use clean waters to wash the glare-proof window.
#4- um, yeah. It is vague, and seems obscene. I think. Or it's just snow. Falling. Around a brownish flame?
I give up.
the cake with the fork and spoon...try this: point your index fingers at each other ==><== like that. raise them to eye level. at a certain point, they make your eyes cross, and you see three fingers, but the one in the middle has two tips, like this ==><=><==. the cake with the fork and spoon looks like someone did that with two...not fingers.
I spotted the T-Rex/Cinderella Cake while getting deli meats at Harris Teeter. My wife was wondering what-in-the-heck I was laughing at. Glad to know I wasn't the only one who thought it was great.
I picture the phone call...
We want a dinosaur themed cake." When picking up cake, "Oh yea, it's for a girl."
Here's a thought-- #4 could be white star pasties on a stripper's (hairy) chest with body glitter. I have no idea.
Also, is that Moses on the tower of the Cinderella/T-Rex cake?
P.S.: Oh, and you posted this on my Birthday! :)
LOVE Cinderella riding the T-rex!
If you ever decide to do a Cake Wrecks Tarot deck, you can use that one for the "Strength" card.
oh, gawd. any idea what cw3 is really supposed to be?
Okay, so that last one is actually kind of awesome. Wreckorator, you did good and you should feel good.
I really want to know what the vaguely obscene one was supposed to be though.
OK, I'm going to give it a shot.
#1 is a pimento loaf cake. Tasty, no doubt.
#4 is 2 tiny snowmen doing their saber dance in the snow, in front of their big red spaceship. It's a religious/ceremonial snowman thing.
#6 is a prototype of the first straightjacket/lifejacket combo. For some reason it didn't take off.
I also want a Cinderella T-Rex cake for my birthday now. All I have to add about #8 is that Snow White has a lot of guts.
Thank you, I'll be here all week.
My word verification was "doomy" Take that any way you please.
Non-glare glass... clean with clean water.. oh darn.. no clean water available.
I think the cookie on Oscar is suppose to represent a garbage can lid... can't you see it? Mwaaahaaaa!
"Bettercream contains no butter! It's made without cream!! It lasts forever and will never, ever go bad. It simply is better.
Also, you can use it to grout your bathroom tiles."
LOL!!! I know, some of those products are scary. I actually have a carton of bettercreme in my freezer.
Oh and I agree with wanting to hang out with the decorator who created the t-rex cake, and the noah on the princess tower cake. Must be an interesting person. Although Im sure she was laughing when she made it. it couldnt have been a serious attempt at a cake.
number 5 looks like some of the masks on warriors of the wind.
This post was great. I'm glad I kept reading even after the first one made me want to throw up.
I never knew Snow White had such a dark side; she's like a dino dominatrix!
Today's post is killing me! Too funny. Comments were hilarious, especially SueBee and Caroline B!
Thanks guys!
Andrea
wv: allobbut: Wreckerator:"How many of these plastic pieces should I put on the cake?" Co-wrecker: "allobbut!"
#1 - eh? Yeah, floor sweep - too bad they didn't sweep it under the rug.
#2 - Yikes. Hooked on Phonics will not help this wrecker.
#3 - I think my eyes exploded.
#4 - call me naive, but I'm getting nothing. Well, almost nothing.
#5 - Krull. Yeah. Gotta be it, especially with the black licorice rope for details.
#6 - Um. I wasn't planning on using the spoon, so I don't care.
#7 - Oscar is leading the pack to recolt against wreckerators... I swear. Love the 'non-glare' glass and the instructions for clean water. Must be a lawyer gumming up the store somewhere.
#8 - wow, a lot of cake on today's post. Seriously, I have a demented granddaughter, she thinks this is awesome and has asked me to make it for her next birthday. GIRL POWER!!!
WOW ... I guess I live a sheltered life. I'm still searching to find a wreck to send in - what are the odds!!
~~Di
I'm glad for the world but embarrassed for myself that I seem to be the first one who believed you that this was a "confessions of the wreckerators" entry. I read and looked at the entries with increasing horror, wondering how people could do such things, and then confess them to you for you to display.
I think it will be funnier the second time I read it.
msyendor said...
"The Princess and the T" = WIN
Oh, thank you for that!!!
#1 At first glance, I seriously saw olives and prosciutto. But then there were ice cream cones and I thought, well THAT can't be right...
#4 WHAT IS IT?
#7 Does Big Bird have a mustache?
I love the one with Cinderella riding the T-Rex. I'm afraid that Snow is inside the critter, though.
That last one is totally not a wreck. It's awesome :D
Upon looking at Cinderalla T-Rex, cannot...contain...aneurism...
BOOM!
That was my brain. It went 'splodey.
Long time reader, but I have to say that these are about the worst cakes I've ever seen posted on here. . . . except that last one. THAT one, I'd buy, I wouldn't eat it, though. I think I'd just continue to gaze at it in wonder and appreciation.
Half those cakes aren't even identifiable.....
The one with the spoon is upside down.
I love the strong-woman implications of Cindarella and the TRex (kinda like Disney twit meets Munsch's paperbag princess and smartens up?)... which counteracts nicely the wreckerator who assumes that women like Victorian-era clutter of flowers, purses, shoes, bows and nailpolish.
I agree, that's got to be one of the "best" mis-spellings of Congratulations in a long time.
And I think I have a dirtier mind than many here because I had *no* trouble coming up options for with what that suggestive cake could be! (Should I be worried??? Nahhh, it had me LMAO) I'd post them but (a) I'd be worried about offending people, or (b) a kid reading it. I will say to jengersnap: I'd vote the one that causes a burning sensation ;)
PS John-- anti-glare eye glasses have a special coating, so you have to be careful about cleaning them. Maybe that case too? (And thanks to the commmenters who noted the irony for those of us who missed it!
This TOTALLY made my day! Cinderella, T-Rex jockey is fabulous!
Any chance #6 is a picnic basket, with a bottle of wine on the left and the fork and spoon on the right?
I think I got a crick looking at #4 from every possible angle, and I STILL don't know what it is. Inquiring minds NEED to know!
For those pondering the spots on number 4, two words for ya: "Shaving" "rash".
Love, love, love the Cinderelly cake (and ROTFLOL at reader comments too)!!!
Picturing the carrot jockey cake in front of it: that...would...be...AWESOME! Cinderalla riding T-rex with her naked mohawk-baby carrot jockey army - she is the supreme bettercreme ruler of all cakedome! That's a cake I want! Bippity-boppity-boo!
I have to point out the little sign by Ariel - it's a display cake and not for consumption. The lawyer must have been there too ('cuz someone ate Snow White and sued).
wv: menisedu. Hey men is ed u? How's ed goin'? I'm lookin' at some caxe.
I am absolutely astonished that nobody has put in dibs for the Cinderella/T Rex cake as a wedding cake. Or at least a groom's cake.
(Please DON'T DO IT!)
I'm making that Cinderella on a T. Rex cake for my daughter's next birthday. Seriously. Love. it.
Marie
Wait... so cake #4 makes it through and the dong cake needs to be censored? What's with that?
#4 has me stumped. Maybe some piece of plastic flotsam fell off to make it make more sense. I don't want to think about what that flotsam might have been...
Oh. My. Goodness. That suggestion for Cinderella on the T Rex with the carrot jockey army is the best idea EVER!
Someone cleverer than me should make that cake, STAT!
Okay; I know the ta-tas sag when they get old, but the model must've been 150 years old.