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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Thursday
Sep022010

Sprinkled With Pride

America!

Here in America...[dramatic pause]...we believe in... patriotism! Integrity! Courage!

We believe that Old Glory should cover not only our hearts...

...but our stomachs as well.

[swelling music]

We believe that education and patriotic sprinkles are the bedrock of our society:


But mostly the sprinkles.

[music swelling further]

America!

We believe that the size of our cupcakes should not be defined by the size of our cups...

...but by the size of our ovens.

We believe that even our bread pudding...


...should be frosted. Patriotically.

Here in America, we believe that no cupcake is complete...

...until it is deep-fried.

Aw yeeeah.

[music swelling further]

America!!

Where even our drizzle is patriotic:


And our monkeys...

...wear American kimonos.

Because we believe that monkey cakes wearing American kimonos is what America is all about.


America!!!!

[music now fully swollen]

And my friends, let us never forget, when it comes to American pride...


...we know how to rock it.

AMERICA!!!!

Glynis C., Carol G., Kay S., Jessica T., Cindy, Jessie from Cakespy, Molly M., Elizabeth J., & Brouk, now's the time on Sprockets when we dance. With monkeys. In kimonos. Patriotically.

« Decorating in the Meantime | Main | Oh, the Irony »

Reader Comments (216)

I've never seen such realistic..."rockets" on a cake. Does that cost extra?

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBrad

*sings*
Bay-bee, I can rock it to you
Hon-ney, the only thing I can do!

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMiranda

Oh wow. Seriously, who makes these?!

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

deep fried cupcakes! me want!

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Destined to be a classic! One of your very best posts.

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCathy

*banging head on desk*

God Bless America!

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDonna

deep fried cupcake? ewwwww.

however, i am laughing at the doughnut! SUA! SUA! (at least that's how I heard it in my head)

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJanet

That last one looks a little bit...um....obscene.

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Wow - nothing says "America" to me like red, white & blue penises. Classy!!

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCatmania

I don't think the music is the only thing that's swollen in the last picture!

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterPaul

Okay, the giant cupcake isn't THAT bad, really. I IS big, but there's actually a bit of a rage these days for cake shaped like cupcakes (No, I don't understand it either).

I LOVE the SUA doughnut, and who ices bread pudding?

Deep fried cupcakes? Someone needs to be hurt. Now. Stop the madness.

But the last one? AWESOME.

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTrevor

Hahahahahahahah! "[music now fully swollen]" Hahahahahahahahah!

That was awesome! Thank you :)

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered Commentersalamandermuse

"America, spread your golden wings, sail on freedom's wind, across the sky. Great bird, with your golden dreams...flying high, flying high!"

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLoren

What is the drizzle in the shape of? And what is drizzle?

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Boob Nazi

Oh beautiful, for wrecky cakes, for mounds of poo frosting.
For spelling errors, phallic cakes and ev'rything between!
America, America, we wreck our cakes for thee!
We drown the cakes that we have baked in mounds of poo frosting!

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKaren

Deep fried cupcakes!? The deep fried trend is really getting out of hand. It makes me want to eat only fruit and vegetables the rest of the day. They deserve a big greasy fatty "gross". Great post by the way, gave me a good laugh.

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I will freely admit that I would try a fried cupcake (although I'll take a pass on the pocket rockets on that last cake). But did you see this - http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/32665106" rel="nofollow">fried butter??

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterabi

oh my. oh. my.

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterWendy

Sorry, I had to do this:

America - F*** yeah!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sWS-FoXbjVI

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAngel H.

Is it me or was that last cake really, really happy to just be nominated?

And They say patriotism is dead.

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDori

The "rockets" were the icing on this post! Pun very much intended.

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMamakitty1978

Put the rocket on the monkey and then you've got a CAKE.

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterHalf Assed Kitchen

(trying to figure out how to explain the gales of laughter coming from my office...)

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterlizzied

The whole thing should be voice-overed by Sam the Eagle.

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterPurplewalls

Abi, I just saw this on msn.com: http://www.delish.com/food/recalls-reviews/fried-beer-at-state-fair-of-texas?gt1=47001

The deep-fried butter was the one that really got to me, too. (Gulp.)

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterNYCGirl

Deep fried cupcakes? I am so going to the county fair this year! (Of course, my gut will make me pay for it later.)

And who thought it was a good idea to wrap a monkey in an American flag? Please tell me this is from some distant country.

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTricia L

Aren't there laws against defacing the flag?

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterPam

I'm sorry, were you saying something? I got distracted by "deep fried cupcakes"...I can't decide if I am feeling a deep craving, or a deep revulsion.

Oh, and I totally agree with the previous poster, Sam the Eagle would be perfect for the voice over!

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLadybug914

Aaaaaugh! The rockets!!!

Thanks guys, now I'm going to have to poke out my eyes.

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Um... the deep fried cupcake actually looks pretty good to me. Then again, I am also the one at Musikfest who ate two other people's deep fried cheesecake when they couldn't finish it themselves.

But the rest of these cakes gotta go. I fear for the children of the "SUA".

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCaitlin

Too. Many. Dirty. Jokes... I have such an evil mind, they're all running through.

And deep fried cupcakes?? I think my waistline just exploded a little looking at the picture...

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterellemck1

I'm sorry but that donut is Australian, see how it says AUS? You have to turn it upside down to read it as befitting the land down under.

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered Commentershaz

Considering they now have deep-fried beer, deep-fried cupcakes shouldn't surprised me that much.

Does the third picture still count as a CCC?

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterM

I love that the bread pudding was labels "automatic price reduction". Like they knew it was going to be so bad they just automatically reduced it.

And I really want to try a deep fried cupcake now!

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterHeather

Is that first one a patriotic pancreas?

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMolly Malone

That bread pudding looks absolutely disgusting, and I think the pathetic attempt to ice it into a star shape just makes it worse. Like the "rockets" tho--the color makes me think of guys who would paint themselves at football games. Maybe they paint ALL of themselves!

WV: aceatoma. The medical condition you get from eating too much deep fried fair crap.

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJulie

I lol'ed at the, erm, rockets. Did those bombs burst in air, or something else? *wink*

I actually really liked the giant cupcake.

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda Mac

Deep fried cupcakes? How'd it taste like?

The last cake got me laugh real hard! Who makes them anyway?

I don't know about anybody else, but I AM an American and I am seriously offended!!!... NOT! I am laughing so hard my college age son came in wondering what was so funny. BWAHAHAHAH!!!

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterQueen Julian XIII

Why, oh, why is the "America...[bleep] yeah!" song from Team America going through my head as I read this post?

Mission Accomplished, Cakewrecks Team! I can't stop laughing!

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterflying gargoyle

::blink:: ::blink::

LAUGH SO LOUD THE DOG STARTS BARKING!!!

::clear throat::

Ummm, I would have been kicked out of the store if I had seen the 'rockets' cake. It's hilarious.

~Tink

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

the "SUA" doughnut looks like it says "SUP" at first.
like the doughnut is asking 'sup?

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered Commentersevenmarie

Absolutely brilliant! And I agree, a Sam the Eagle voiceover would have been the red white and blue icing on the cake. But we can imagine it, that's almost as good.

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

OMG!!

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKelly

[music now fully swollen]

A+++++++++
I need to find a way to use that in conversation.

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSylph

SUA: how Yoda abbreviates America? States United of America are...

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterIsabella

Seriously, the "artist" who made the rockets...either made those very deliberately, or really does not get out much!!

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The deep fried cupcake made me throw up in my mouth a little.

* shudder *

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKashmir

Those "rockets" seem quite...*cough*...rousing.

wv: nowspro - Theses wreckerator are nowspro? More like nowsthrowup.

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered Commentercoeurdechoeur

I thought blue, white and red were french colors.

FRANCE!!

September 2, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterHellboundAlleee

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