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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Monday
Aug232010

I Never Inhaled

This was ordered for a school competition called the Academic Decathlon:

Or, as Wreckerators know it, "AcPec."

Now, I'd like to say that at least they spelled "capitalize" right, buuuut...

they didn't.

*sigh*

The following is a dramatization. The Wreck, however, is very real.

Bakery: "Yello!"

Jenny C.: "Hi, I'd like a cake with 'Happy Birthday' on it."

Bakery: "Sure! Anything else?"

Jenny C: [shaking head] "Just 'Happy Birthday'."

Bakery: "Okey dokey!"

*sigh*

Two friends nicknamed Frizz and Kermit ask a baker to hold a blank cake for them while they finish their shopping. The baker agrees, and sticks a hold tag on the box.

What happened next? Only the Wrecker knows.

"On hold regularly."

Well that clears things up.

*sigh*

And finally, Anda ordered a couple of cakes for a birthday party. To keep it simple, she asked for the same inscription on both. Which is exactly what she got.

Yep, despite the fact that the Wreckerator wrote "bath," s/he actually did write the same thing on both. I don't have a photo of the second cake, but Anda assures me it looked a lot like this:

Really.

And the kicker?

The store refused to fix them.

Why?

Because - waaaait for it - that's what she asked for.

Really.

All together now: *sigh*

Kristy M., Jenny C., Ellen K., & Anda S., this post would make a great breathing exercise. :)

« Here's Your Sprinkles | Main | Sunday Sweets: Threadcakes! »

Reader Comments (60)

That is so lame exclamation point! STUPID WRECKORATORS underneath that.

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRita/Fighting Off Frumpy

Wow. I think I'm really just floored with this.

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTrevor

The store refused to fix them because that's what the customer asked for???

OMG.

On what planet would a rational person have order that last "set" of cakes?

i don't know whether to laugh or cry...

addie

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered Commentermn_me

Buddy, let me tell you that's a mistake.
Oh, look, he'll fix it with just one scrape.
Celebrity, creepy, letters not straight,
What did you expect, he's not the Ace of Cakes!
Singin'

We will, we will wreck you!
We will, we will wreck you!

Sharon's Edible Art

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSharon

I don't know what "copitalize" means, but I can imagine, and it's not pretty.

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGary

Wow. Just wow.

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDebbi

ROFL TMMD !!!

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterdiddleymaz

Obviously, cake "decorators" don't have the internet either. This site is a public service announcement. Unfortunately, there are still those unreachable by technology and the ads for public concern...

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJulie U

So, the bakery makes a big mistake and the manager refuses to fix it because the mistake was in writing down the order, not just the order execution? Wow. I bow down before the manager's superior logic. The only solution would have been to hand him the cakes, say "No givesies backsies" and run away.

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterOtherRobert

They refused to fix it?! Wow. That is incredibly unprofessional, especially when it would take two minutes with a toothpick and an icing bag. I would be asking for a manager.

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa

Totally off the subject, this morning I saw a rerun of the always hysterical "Graham Norton Show," which originally ran on BBC America on October 31, 2009. He regularly features funny material from the Web -- today, it was CakeWrecks! You're now known to Michael Buble and Isabella Rossini!

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterkayk

Oops --that's Rossellini, of course.

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterkayk

You know, it actually pains me to consider that there are people out there in the workforce who are this blithely idiotic. Common sense and intelligence have apparently died a horrible and tragic death.

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGrnEyes

I think the "on hold" issue for Friz and Kermit involves spending a lot of time on the telephone. Or else this cake was used as a message pad to let someone at the bakery know there was a call holding, as in "Friz and Kermit on line one."

Normie

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Those "both" cakes are the exact same image. I want to see the actual second cake.

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Sometimes, there still is a case for mandatory sterilization.

We need to stop allowing this idiocy to breed.

wv - faceisc... is that 'feces' with an accent or a wreckerator's dream?

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I'm shocked by how many of these types of wrecks (my favorite, tied with the Inspiration vs. Perspiration) you could find for today's post. Shocked, and yet highly amused. And a little saddened.

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnne

The funniest part of this is that I have a friend who has tried for a while to get a job as a decorator in a bakery and she never even gets a call-back. I think it's because she has a college degree. In English.

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJulieLeto

When I was taking cake orders for Dairy Queen, I used to hand the order pad to the customer so they could write in exactly what they wanted... Too many times, I was rewriting the orders after the customer left because of spelling and grammatical errors... Ah the lonely life of a to-be English teacher making ice cream cakes...

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKatherine

I have to know...
How do the wreckerators WANT the instructions delivered??
Do they need an actual sketch? Would that help? Or would they then just scan it and print on edible paper?
Alex

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

There used to be (not sure if it's still around) a site called "Eric Has an Emotion." Insanely funny, but that's just what it was--photos of this guy with different expressions. These wrecks remind me of "Surprise (good)" and "Surprise (bad)". You can guess which one applies here.

PS: Sharon, I'm holding up my virtual Bic in honor of your Queen homage! =D

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterladyrazorsharp

Honestly, just because the customer isn't ALWAYS right, doesn't mean they never are and that wreckerators should argue with them about what they asked for on their cake...

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterjaypay

*Sigh* indeed.

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSariah

Almost makes you wonder why the unemployment rate isn't HIGHER.

WV: pingr - What you get on Cake Wreck when you ask for a zinger.

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnnaB

Ooooh but someone would DIE!!! Seriously? "That's what you asked for?" Dude, if I asked you to close up and get out of the cake business completely could I get that too? Yeah, I'd cut a bitch LOL

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCulinarychiq

They refused to fix it? I think you should out the store that did that on this one. That goes beyond just wrecking into unprofessionalism.

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Is the human race becoming more and more stupid?

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Everybody suffers a lapse in judgment from time to time. It's a part of being human, it's perfectly forgivable, and as we see here all the time, it's usually great for a laugh.

I've made stupid mistakes on cakes, so come on, fellow Wreckorators! Let's laugh at ourselves! Humility is healthy.

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterbakeratdawn

If the store has a policy where they read back the message to the client very carefully and get the client to agree that yes, that's really really what they want, then there's a vague sort of excuse for not fixing it. Still a bad customer service move, but at least an excuse.

However I am willing to bet that they have no such policy and did not read it back to confirm.

WV: haragic: a mystical level of harassment, as in, "Apparently one must get positively haragic with these stupid bakery managers to get decent service."

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKimberly Chapman

I did laugh hard due to this posting yet wow - the ineptitude the way beyond Laurel and Hardy
level of obliviousness is staggering. The refusal to fix that last issue is of the kind of bureaucratic think one used to read of in novels set in China or Soviet Russia.... * sigh *....

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered Commentercaferacers66

argh omg anda's cake is killing me!! THEY WON"T FIX IT BECAUSE THAT IS WHAT SHE ASKED FOR?!?! if that is what she asked for then why did they put it on both cakes???? if she asked for "happy birthday on both" shouldn't it be on just one???

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterM.J.

I can't believe the stores refused to fix the cakes... I've fixed lettering that was the "wrong" color (they didn't specify what color they wanted for the inscription so, silly me, they asked for pink roses and I wrote "Happy Birthday" in pink!) and I've fixed names that the customer spelled wrong (THEY wrote it on the pad, insisted that they had spelled "Jhonny" correctly, then brought it back an hour later for me to fix the spelling!), AND I've fixed cakes that were set on the floor of the minivan where a 3-year-old had to step over it... and stepped right on it! Yeah, having to fix that one meant doing the whole cake over!

These wreckerators give all of us a bad name!

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmy M. Bennett

Classic wreckiness!!! Awesome!!!

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

Isn't it time to advertise the source of these cakes. After all, we all deserve the reputation we earn. Maybe it's time, too, to speed the demise of some of these businesses. If I have to draw out on paper the exact layout of a cake, I might as well haul out the piping bag. Or maybe it's time to open a farcial "Cake Wrecks Bakery". Oh! Is that where these are coming from? Norine

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I still can not figure out what the first one was supposed to say. And refusing to fix it? Anyone hear of customer service? I'd have refused to pay for it. No cake? Oh well, better than paying for a slap in the face.

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMaureen

I don't read that "both" as "bath." My cursive O's look pretty much like that, and you can see an A in "birthday" for comparison. But that's the furthest I'll defend them. They must know they made a mistake and be too greedy to admit it.

WV: redig -- If we see the duplicate cake, we can redig this error.

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterClassic Steve

If the first cake (in honor of the academic decathlon seniors) is not the definition of IRONY, then I don't know what is...

Reminds me of the time eons ago when I was in a high school spelling contest (placed second, alas), and my trophy, I kid you not, read: "SPILLING CONTEST!" Needless to say, the trophy stayed hidden afterwards...

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDaisy

Looks like both not bath to me

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

@Gary: "Copitalize" means you'll be reported to the cybercakewreckspolice. Consequences (and overuse of ginormous bunches of ribbon that obscure half the cake forcing the wreckorator to write half way down) will never be the same.

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterWolvie Girl

good lord, some people should not be out in public....

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

OMG! I was in Academic Decathlon back in the day and we would have laughed our butts off at that first cake! Too funny, and too sad, really.

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSuperPeeps

Oh my word. This post physically hurts me.

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterakhead

The "Happy Birthday / Just Happy Birthday" cake isn't a Wreck. It's exactly what "Bond. James Bond" asked for on his cake.

August 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

Unbelievable. No wait this is cake wrecks so what I am seeing is true.. ugh what the heck is wrong with these bakeries??? And to not fix something when the customer asks them to is just wrong. I hope they didn't pay for either cake and grabbed the store manager. I loled when I saw that first cake. Boy I bet the customer just loved it..before throwing it in the wreckerators face lol.

August 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

At least Anda should know (if she read this post) that had the bakery not refused, she would have probably ended up with cake #2.

"Look, can I get them to say "Happy Birthday"? Just "Happy Birthday" not "Happy Birthday on Both!"

"Sure, no problem!"

August 24, 2010 | Unregistered Commenter99 and 1/2 Days

I can just imagine the manager in that last fiasco smugly holding up the order form, with 'Happy Birthday on Both' scribbled in the inscription field.

If I had been the customer in that case, here's how the follow up would have gone:

"Hello, remember me? Two cakes with "Happy Birthday on Both" written on each of them? Doesn't matter. I'd like to order another cake. I want it to say, 'You're Fired'. That's Y-O-U-apostrophe-R-E. What's an 'apostrophe'? Never mind, that just helps prove my point. I won't be picking it up -- it's for your boss. You see, I just got off the phone with corporate, and I told them yes, there was something else they could do to make it up to me, in addition to a double refund. Have a nice day." [CLICK]

August 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

Wreckoraters are getting far to literal these days. Don;t give them a GPS, because they tell you to turn a number of meters before the actual turn. When you find a car lodged in someone's fence, half way up a street light or launching itself from the exit ramp back onto the freeway, you can be sure it is a literal wreckorater behind the wheel.

August 24, 2010 | Unregistered Commentershikishinobi

If I were the store manager, I'd make a large laminated list of words that are commonly requested on cakes, SPELLED PROPERLY, for the wreckerators in the grocery and big box stores that commonly screw up! It's is just beyond comprehension that this crap goes out the door!
But what I'd really like to know WHY people actually accept it unless it is already paid for in advance. And then I'd take pics and contact corporate offices, and you of course!
Wow, either my standards are too high or I really DO need anger management!!

August 24, 2010 | Unregistered Commentery

Oh really? So she asked for "Happy Birthday on both on both", hmmm? Doubt it.

ladyrazorsharp: It's "Eric conveys an emotion", and while no new ones have been posted for ages, the old ones are still up. emotioneric.com.

August 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The title of this post made me giggle--love the subtle dig there.

Now on to the cakes: REALLY? Just freakin' REALLY?

What's even more pathetic? I have lovely handwriting and perfect grammar/spelling, yet I was turned down for a cake decorating job because I haven't any experience in the field yet. Never mind that I am 100% positive I could be an enormous improvement to the industry, judging by cakes like these!

Also, the store's refusal to fix those two cakes is absolutely ridiculous, and I think you need to find out who it was so a boycott can be established. 0:)

August 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda

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