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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Monday
May102010

Proud Mamas

It was Mother's Day yesterday.

(I'll pause here to allow some of you to dash off to the phone and/or flower shop.)

Now, moms are usually the ones to teach us that it's the thought that counts. So what do you suppose these add up to?

Which is the greater crime: the misspelling, or that color combination? I mean, I can't say I've ever actually seen purple vomit, but I'm sure that's the right shade for it.


Ah, so close.

This flotsam manufacturer failed to realize that their backwards "s" looks a lot like an "a":

Arguably more accurate?



Anther (n): "the part of a stamen that contains the pollen"

Hm. I think I'll let you make the joke. ;)

Maybe if we stick to the simplest, shortest words possible:


*facepalm*

Fine. Can we go shorter than this?

Ah, there it is! Much better.

Although, John calls his mom "Mum." You know, not like this:

She'll feel special because it's this week's Special! And also because there's something that looks almost exactly as unlike a heart as humanly possible drawn on it.


Or, for you teenage girls out there, how about spelling out the thing you say most to Mom?

All it needs is an exclamation point and an eye roll.

(Yes, I know it's for a godmother. I just can't look at it without hearing the daughter on Modern Family. Heh.)

Holly W., Rory M., Anne M., Robyn O., Mercy G., Robyn E., Jared N., & Joanna C., you've made your moms proud today. (I think.) Great work.

« The Bakers Wrecked 'Em | Main | Sunday Sweets: Happy Mother's Day! »

Reader Comments (62)

I have seen purple vomit. The cake decorator nailed it.

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTaylor

The Mum cake is also a "Fresh Mud Cake". Nothing says I Love You like wet dirt, at least that's what my cat thinks.

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTricia L

"Mun"

....

I like that!!

I'm going to start calling my own mother that and insisting that my own (adult) child call me "Mun" as well. ^_-

(Okay - it may be "Mum". but I could swear it says "Mun")

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKarasu

I read that last one as "Cod Mother." I... was confused. It seemed a little fishy to me.

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCara

I'm totally bummed I didn't see my wrecks at the grocery store until Sat. I'm still sending them to you for another Mother's Day post.

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTrevor

Those are great! Made me laugh out loud!! Especially the `facepalm` =)

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMichelle S

I, like Cara, saw a "C" instead of a "G". I thought it would be perfectly wrecky if the cake order was for "MOTHER" and the "COD" on the order slip was to indicate that it hadn't been paid for yet.

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commentertfofurn

Well, I hope all you Muns, Momys, and Beat Moms (complete with beret, bongos, and espresso?) had a happy Mother's Day.

Hmm, "Momy" ... the Spanish word for "mummy" (as in a preserved dead person) is "momia." Do you think ... Nah, probably not.

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGary

I think you need to start a new blog called Facepalm. Kind of like Fail but funnier.

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterHalf Assed Kitchen

We didn't have cake. We make PIE!

I have to say the 1# cake LOOKS delicious. That rich dark chocolate.

And of course we'll be in a huge hurry to cut it...to minimze the number of people who can read it, so that cake is a success...well, SUCCESS might be a little strong.

:)

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMary Connealy

The misspelling on the second cake is not that bad, they just missed one little apostrophe...

"World's greatest's Mom" has truly succeeded in raising a child with a healthy self-esteem.

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterViiriäinen

The squiggle mom writing and the god mother cracked me up because those would be the ones my kids would get me. And yes, they would be using the exclamation mark on the last one. : )

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterStella

This is why sometimes it's easier to send flowers than to buy a cake from these places. However, now I wonder if there's a Flower Wrecks site.

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Black Dog

I think that first cake is for all the Tommy James and the Shondells fans out there (or Billy Idol fans, depending on your age):

"Ooh I love you Momy, Mo, Mo, Momy ..."

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSaralyn

I saw "COD MOTHER" on the last one too :)

I saw the best cookie wreck at work yesterday, poo-icing bears! I saw that and wanted to buy it myself just to send a picture, and somebody else bought it (after the baker marked it down) before I could even take a picture. :(

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDonna M.

For the last cake:

I think that's actually supposed to be "Fairy God Mother". Note the Tinkerbell-ish figure next to the "God".

Doesn't excuse it's wreckiness of design, but my Godmother has always called herself my "Fairy Godmother", so yeah, I picked up the reference immediately.

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterChasmosaur

I agree with what Taylor said- having been witness to purple vomit (tip for mothers- avoid the prune baby food), that is the EXACT shade. And trust me, that's not a sight you forget fast. *she says 15 years after the sighting*

Great post, as always! :)

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMissWoodhouse

Purple puke exists.
This mother has witnessed it.

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDecadent Housewife

I can just hear the kid presenting the 1# cake to his mom:

Kid: "1 number mom! That's all we needed and that Powerball jackpot could have been ours. But noooo you went with little Timmy's birthday instead of mine. So here'e you stinkin cake for Mother's Day and it's all your getting because now it's all I can afford. 1 number and it could have been a Bentley!"

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Your version of "God Mother" would also need a comma. But seeing as how this is called Cake Wrecks and all, maybe you're just setting up a future post?

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSwirlyPants

The sixth one looks like it was piped by a monkey.

World's Greatest Momy? Seriously?

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterScarlett Robyn

I think the pone with the bear was done that way on purpose to look like a child's writing. The rest.. horrible

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Hey Taylor - I saw purple vomit once too! Cafeteria at Lewis Elementary School, Houston, Texas, about 1965ish. Were you there? I agree, the decorator nailed it.

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterElizabeth

I thought for sure the last cake said "cod mother".

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commentercyn_teacher

I suspect that ALL mother's day cakes (wrecks or not) starting today will have the "This Week's Special" sticker on them. It is a much worse idea that buying next year's Christmas presents on sale the week after Christmas.

Oh Honey! Look, I found the cake I bought you last year on sale and forgot where I had put it away.

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKen

Oh moms. They deal with everything from vomit to bad cakes.

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterdietplaid

You've never seen purple vomit? What-- you didn't drink Purple Passion in college??

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

What blows my mind about "World's Greatests Mom" is that that looks like double-layered icing, which means the decorator would have had to go over it twice and STILL didn't notice the error.

That, or maybe there is some other kind of icing that I don't understand. But still!

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Doesn't "1 # Mom" translate to "One Sharp Mom"? Seems to me we have a musical genius working in the bakery.

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterPoultrygeist

Not that we officially do Mother's Day or Father's Day in our house, but if any kid of mine was going to give me a cake, it really would mean so much more if they made it themselves. Then any wreckiness would be adorable instead of facepalmy.

WV: boastrap.

*dirty joke potential overload*
*brain shutdown commencing*
.................
NO CARRIER

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKimberly Chapman

Just wondering when decorators started using Silly String ("MOM" thing) ..which happens to be inedible, but I'm being way too picky. At least it's *only* $6.00 "WITH YOUR BONUS CARD." What a deal.
1* Mom...(Cake? Cookie? Cow flop?)
Well, personally, I've been looking for what they REALLY want to say, as an asterisk generally indicates that there is some sort of something to be clarified. (Please~~ feel free to elaborate.)
=^=.=^=

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

My 2 year old son does call me Mun, as he can't pronounce Mom yet, so that cake would've suited me fine!

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterColleen

I have spewed purple vomit, and I can vouch that the wrecker got the colour so hideously correct....ick.

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterangels-redagger

I think the "mun" one would have been less wrecky if it were for Fathers Day!

(mun = yiddish for poppy seed. See, you're inspiring your readers to dish out half-baked bad puns ☺ )

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAliza

This mom has also seen purple vomit. Stomach virus + grape-flavored fever-reducer.

I never realized there were so many ways to make purple vomit.

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKim

@Poultrygeist, thank you for that. I was reading it as "One-Pound Mom", which is just weird in too many ways.

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGoueznou

LOL the reference to the daughter on Modern Family because that's exactly the voice I heard in my head when I saw that last cake. Too funny!

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterShelly C.

The cookie looks like what one of those last-minute shoppers I saw all day yesterday at Wal-Mart would snatch up off the bakery rack on the way home. Because nothing says "I love you, mom" like a stale cookie with sloppy frosting slapped on the top...

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma!

Maybe the 1# mom is just really, really, really skinny.

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMaria

1# Mom. That's actually rather nice; I don't see any...

...Oh. Right. Here, I'll join you. *facepalm*

You know though, if other moms are like my mom, I could give her one of these atrocities and she'd STILL cry.

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterladyrazorsharp

I've been checking out this website for way too long, because I was actually impressed that the decorator of "world's greatests mom" got the apostrophe right.

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJill

Wow. They would be cute if they were made by a small child for their relative, but "professionally" those are really very sad.

I once ordered a cake that came out so bad that I found an old cake decorator book and gave it to them to learn how to really make a professional cake. The manager was VERY upset with me. Not that I was worried, because I was certainly not ordering from them again after the horrible job they did.

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

On the "Mom is anther word for love" cake, they can (theoretically) do a quickie fix on that (!) by just taking their (theoretical) pinkie finger and twirling that little curled upswing thing at the end of the "n," into a little "o." It won't be perfectly in line with the other letters, but it's the thought that counts (theoretically)! (SNORT)
Go on--give it the (proverbial) old college try! What have you got to lose, other than your (dubious) self respect?
=^~.-^=

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

I also saw Cod Mother.

On a grammatical note, my sister and I have been discussing whether it's "Mother's Day" or "Mothers' Day"... the thought being it would be "Mothers' Day" since it is a day belonging to all mothers.

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterlauren

What did those mothers due to deserve those cakes?

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterFanboy Wife

*eye roll*

Love it.

Oh, and WV? sheat

I can't make this stuff up...

May 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

That last one if you look fast appears to say Cod Mother.. lol. Now that I would love to see someone present as a gift to their mom. As for the rest.. I think that purple vomit covers it for me for those. Ugh.

May 11, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

If you offend the Cod Mother, do you end up sleeping with the fishes?
Sorry......

May 11, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCaroline B

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