Monday
Mar152010
I'm Looking Over My Wrecked Up Clover
March 15, 2010 Saint Patrick's day is this week, and to celebrate, Wreckerators are clearly getting into the Irish spirit. (And by "spirit," I mean "Guinness.")
(Because by the end of this post, you'll have no IDEA what one looks like.)First up, "Oscar Lends a Hand:"
Ouch."Wasted Windmills:"
The care. The precision.
The...triangle thingies.
I don't usually call out specific bakery chains, but c'mon, Target. Really?[Seth: Really?]
[Amy: Really! Really?]
[Seth: I mean, Reeeeally.]
"Something Vaguely Obscene on Something Vaguely Hat-Like:"
Never mind, Target. All is forgiven."The Right Hook:"
Why do they always curve to the right? "The Sham...WOW":
You following this, camera guy?Yeah, me neither.
"The Thing I'm Told is a Shamrock But I'm Not Buying It:"
And from the looks of things, neither is anyone else.Maia G., Meg K., Lori B., Carrie M., Misty B., Trisha D., & Alex, I want you to know that my little Guinness joke does NOT mean I think Irish people are all alcoholics, and I would hate to have any of you lovely Irish readers think that. Especially considering your hair-trigger tempers and all.
- Related Wreckage: Rockin' Shams
UPDATE: Today I learned that there is a difference between clovers and shamrocks. As I understand it from your comments, clovers can have either 3 or 4 leaves, but shamrocks can only have three Epcots. [nodding seriously] Good to know, good to know.
Reader Comments (143)
Ha ha! Looks like broccoli has finally got a following as the new St Pat day symbol! Go Broccoli!
Yikes! They're not even trying. And there's no way that last one is ANYTHING!
http://agirlinherkitchen.blogspot.com/
Only one thing, Jen - Shamrocks have three leaves. Your example is a fine four-leaf clover, but it's no shamrock either.
It's why St. Patrick used it as a symbol for the holy Trinity: the leaves stood for the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost. Really. (I always liked the term Holy Ghost. Sounded much spookier than spirit.) That is a lot of useless information for someone who's not even Catholic!
And the sham-wows are clearly meant for another holiday, Siddown and Eat Yer Broccoli day, celebrated on...uh...March 17th.
My daughter made me stop at the "hat" one and said, "Mom, I want that one. A hat for my birthday is so cool. I want that cake!" So, I guess you have to be 4 to appreciate fine cake art.
Some of those "shamrocks" look more like broccoli.
A shamrock has three sections, not four. It represents the Trinity.
That last line had me the closest I've ever been to needing a squeejee for my laptop. Thanks for the Top' o' the mornin' smile.
Oh, come on. What's wrong with Target encouraging all the kids who read their catalog to eat more broccoli?
Those get an "E" for effort. I think the last one is supposed to be either a hybrid shamrock, or a disease-riddled one...you decide.
Holy crap. Of all the easiest possible designs and they still bork it!
*snort* *cough* *choke* bahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
(the sounds I made as I snorted my coffee before bursting into laughter at the Right Hook)
WV: axese. I think all these cakes should be axese to death.
Great, funny post as always. But you may want to re-think your shamrock reference photo. What you've depicted is a four-leaf clover. Any good church-going child can tell you that St. Patrick used the Shamrock to illustrate the Holy Trinity- three parts of one being. Shamrocks only have three leaves. Just sayin'...'cause you are the only one that gets to be a smarty pants.
-Erin
Most of these look like weird mutant fungus under the microscope.
Am I the only one who thinks the right hook wreck is more obscene than the "hat"?
aren't shamrocks and four leaf clovers entirely different things?
these are awesomely scary <3
I was in my local Zehrs yesterday and deeply regretted that I didnt' have a camera. Apparently, the Zehrs bakery was under the impression that St. Patties Day was about to happen. Oops.
Hi. Your reference photo isn't a shamrock. It is a four leaf clover. Shamrocks only have 3 leaves. St Pat taught the Irish about the Holy Trinity by using a shamrock.
"When are they going to STOP putting 'windmill' in Pictionary??"...The Community, pretty funny, never mind.
In what world is there red in a shamrock? Really, because I am very curious.
I appreciate any wreckerator who goes out of their way to make everything look like a penis.
Amazing...'stems' on some of these shamrocks.
I I might make one tiny observation? A shamrock has three leaves; your reference photo is a four-leaf clover (considered lucky because there are a lot fewer of them than the three leaf ones). You often see both as symbols for St. Patrick's Day now, but it was the three leafed shamrock that St. Patrick used to teach the idea of the Holy Trinity being three persons in one God when he went to Ireland.
So endeth the lesson!
Val
CT
REALLY? Wow! Now, honestly...how can ANYONE think that last cake is a shamrock in any form? That person should be fired. Seriously! Where's Donald Trump when you need him?
That last one is just unacceptable - Guinness or not!
Wow...that fifth one just looks obscene. You sure that's a shamrock?
I also happen to think that last one was never meant to be a shamrock; it's clearly a used lollipop that fell in the trash.
I think the last one supposed to be a Irish flag colored sharock. Got that?
Just horrible. Horrible.
I THINK they may have been trying to incorporate the colors of Ireland's flag into the last one (green, white, orange). Still - there's no excuse for that kind of wreckage!
One other nitpick... although I agree that those cookies are, indeed, wreckariffic, I have, in my possession, a beautiful Shamrock plant, and each leaflet is a perfect triangle. There are, however, only three leaflets to each stem.
So I give that wreckarator points for tryin'. The others, though? coffee-snortin' time. Honestly!
Some of these cakes - and you know which ones I mean! - remind me of a "classic" pickup line: "Do you have any Irish in you? Do you want any?"
As for the rest...I drew better shamrocks on my Cousin Jack cookies last year. Yeesh.
Word verification: phailyc. Offered without comment.
I saw that Target ad and immediately thought cake wreck! It's pretty bad! :)
I'm pretty sure that last one is a SanwichPop.
joliman
If only my kids were here to help me comment. btw, judging by these, I doubt the spirit of choice was Guinness. maybe some sort of Irish whiskey...
1) is that a triple eared elephant? that stalk looks like a trunk. maybe he's wearing a fancy collar.
2) those windmills are sad.
3) nvm...
4) is that the Green Giant's hat with broccoli on it showing his support for veggies?
5) I don't know WHAT that is but the stalk end looks very suspicious...
6) again with the broccoli? are we celebrating vegetarian day?
7) I don't know WHAT that is. ice cream scoop with a cherry on a green stick? sports equipment? no clue...it's NOT a shamrock
This whole post was hilarious. Thanks for help getting through Monday!
WV: sycgrup - All us people who enjoy these wrecks, we're a sycgrup
Thank God you included the Target ad picture! I saw that and immediately thought of the site. I'm surprised they allowed such a wrecky CCC (ptooie) begging to be mocked.
Stacie - loved the callback to Community. "Stop drawing circles around it!"
hahaha I think the first is my favorite.
Well, I'm glad to see that Seth and "Amy" are still together and going strong!!! Guess I better make sure to tell Seth!!! LOL!!
Oh lay off about the shamrock/four-leaf clover, guys. Either way, it's a clover, and it still proves that these cake "designers" dropped out of art in the fourth grade.
Was going to say basically the same as Suzi!
HEY YOUR SHAMROCK IS ACTUALLY A FOUR LEAFED CL--
Oh never mind, beaten to it.
Uhm.... Why does the third to last one have a "tip" on the stem??
That's funny. I saw the Target ad and instantly thought.... "Really? I mean Really? Cakewrecks will love this one!" and promptly got distracted by Ace of Cakes. :)
*worried that I probably just alarmed my neighbours by howling [like a bean sidhe! XP] with laughter* Whew... *wiping tears from my eyes*
To respond to the comments citing the story about St. Patrick and the shamrock. I was raised Catholic, so I grew up hearing that as well. However, the ancient Celts already had the concept of triple deities - both Triple Gods and Triple Goddesses - way before St. Patrick came along. If you look at ancient Irish art, there are many uses of three images interconnected, such as the triquetra and the triskelion [like the spiral triskelions which can be found at Newgrange.]
The story about St. Patrick is most likely another example of the common practice of the Catholic Church back in those days to take local customs and ascribe Christian meanings to them to make it easier to convert the people. [To be clear, I'm just stating that objectively as a matter of historical fact. I'm not passing judgment here.]
a 4 leaf clover is a rare mutation of a 3 leaf 4 leaf is still a shamrock just rarer
wv lessedic some of the wrecks need lessedic
d
Actually...
(wait for it)
(wait for iiiiiit)
It's Epcot.
Couldn't resist!
I recieved my first cake wreck this weekend! It was my birthday and I had requested cupcakes (I actually heart CCC's because of the mass amount of icing that is involved). Anyway, my husband (the sweet sweet man that he is) picked up a CCC for me that was intended to say, "Happy Birthday Chrisy"...instead, it said "Wappy Birfday Christy". Apparently they think my husband has a speech impediment.
Love the Weekend Update reference!
first of all: WOW! who knew shamrocks were so hard to make? and REALLY, Target? I'm ashamed of you.
secondly: I'm Irish. and I love my Guinness. and we're all alcoholics. and we're okay with that.
I think the first cake is actually a green hand-turkey. As for the rest, er, .
All the complaints about 3-4 leaf clovers and yet the first one has 6! Maybe it's a moldy turkey Thanksgiving cake? The last one looks like a poisonous mushroom laying on its side.
Wow, I wonder what these bakers would come up with if you asked them for a cross or a circle? Never mind, with Easter coming up, we'll probably find out.
I do feel obligated to point out, though, that your reference picture of a shamrock is actually a four leafed clover. A proper shamrock has three Epcots.
"Hey Emily, come and look at this!"
"What?"
"Check out these cakes!"
"Hmm, interesting.. um.. broccoli."
"It's not broccoli. It's a shamrock."
"Oh."
Nice Shamrocks!
On a side note, Happy Birthday to Me!!!
The last one looks like a daffodil for St. David's Day! It was on the 1st of March, so maybe that's what they were aiming at? Still a pretty poor daff though...