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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Wednesday
Sep232009

Pioneering Pastries

Today on the continuing "Virtual" Tour we get to visit Ree Drummond, aka the Pioneer Woman. Yes, THE Pioneer Woman. For those few of you who haven't yet been introduced to this 2008 Blog of the Year winner, Ree is a self-described desperate housewife who went from "spoiled city girl to domestic ranch wife in the blink of an eye." Her site is spectacular, with plenty of humor, gorgeous photography, recipes, and more. I highly recommend a visit.

Now, since Ree is married to a real live cowboy, and does in fact live on a cattle ranch, I tried to find some Wrecks to make her and her readers feel right at home here.

[dusting off hands] There! That should do it.

What, a dead cow is too creepy? Nooo problem.

See, the eyes are open, so that's how you can tell it's alive. Much less creepy.

NOTE: I'm about to post some horse cakes. So first, let's pause and say a quick prayer that no equine-related tragedies are occurring - or have recently occurred - anywhere in the world.

All set? Goodie.

Hey, Phil, why the long lip? (Bwahahahah!!)


There, there, Poncy, I'm sure those spots will clear up in no time. What's that? Why, yes, you do look a little flushed. But I'm sure it's nothing, really.

Dude, you are soo not a horse. [backing away] Oh, but hey, don't mind me. You can hang here with the horsies just as long as you like, uh, sir. Please don't gore me.

Well, my dear Wreckies, we have reached the end of today's post...

...but(t) I do hope you got a kick out of it.

Be sure to check out Ree's post on my virtual visit here, and watch for her gorgeous new book, The Pioneer Woman Cooks, to hit shelves later this month.

Thanks to Wreckporters Regina B., K.P., Amanda L., Luci, Livia B., & Kara H.!

- Related Wreckage: FHOTD, This One's For You

« About Last Night... | Main | "Serious" Eats »

Reader Comments (89)

:D Eeeeeeee I seriously laughed out loud when the last one came up! Great job!

September 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterGoof

The second cake, when I look at it, I hear an eerie, desperate whisper, "Heeeelllllpppppp meeeeeeeeee!!"

On the plus side, I have a strong desire to watch The Godfather again.

September 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterI'm Just a Girl

Oh, great, Jen.

You've now provided me with yet another website I've got to visit on a daily basis while my employer assumes I am working!

Love your site, by the way! It's still numero uno in my browser.

September 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKaren

I can't believe all the missed opportunity's to coin the phrase,"CCC-cup COW cake".

Thanks for the great blogs everyday-I'm never hungry for cake after I've visited!

September 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCyndi

I think this tour of other blogs is awesome. In fact, I've giggled copiously MORE than usual the past couple days.

September 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJael

What has been seen cannot be unseen. Thanks a lot, Cake Wrecks!

September 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBurris

This is my first time to your blog. I have only read the first post (about the cows and horses) and I haven't stopped laughing yet! The other comments are hilarious too! Great job!

September 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJones Town

SO love P-dub! I plugged her book on my blog too. :) She is so loved.

That horse CCC is terrifying, BTW.

September 23, 2009 | Unregistered Commentercuregirl0421

Hooooo Boy! There sure are some talented people out there....unfortunately none of them made any of these cakes.

The dead cow at the beginning is well done, but just very strange subject matter.

And yeah, I noticed there was something wrong with the horse's hooves on the butt cake. They ARE backwards!

September 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSuzanne Dargie

The fourth cake (pink with white dots) reminds me of the plague of incurable boils...

September 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterS.

I expect those cow cakes to taste like a hamburger.

September 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSamantha

Ahhh, now artax is going headfirst!!!

September 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEllen

John (Husband of Jen),

No worries. I've never been one to hide my name. And I was just offering my feedback. I love this site, and it's often been the highlight of my very bad days to come here and see what Jen has posted, along with her hysterical commentary. I'm looking forward to meeting you all at the event in DC. i'm trying to fomulate a truly appropriate wrecktastic cupcake to bring with me.

September 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTrevor

Whatever kicked that last horse into the sheet-board thing was crazy strong. It's feet are on backwards!

Ha. "Demon Llama"
I love that movie.

September 23, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterwondrousitem

Dead cow cake is just wrong, but undead cow cake is even wronger.

I'm less disturbed by Poncy's spots than by his (her?) disproportionately long legs and apparent lack of neck.

The horse-butt cake - now that's cool! Fiance and I are planning a cowboy party, and I think we may have found our cake - with the hoof problem corrected, of course.

WV - orippy - o-rippy ti yi yo, git along little horsie(butt)...

September 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCake_or_Death

Trevor,

Then Wreck On Brother!

and Sandi?

It's at the bottom. Kinda hard to find...

john

September 23, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjohn (the hubby of Jen)

What on earth *is* that third "horse" cake?? And why does it appear to be chewing its way through the table at me??

September 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKathrine

I'm sorry, but I think the first one is actually pretty good. :p

September 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJenni

Curse You CW Jen! I've wasted more than a good share of my day engrossed in the romance story of her getting to know her husband. Great story, but arghhh!!!!

September 23, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterpinkleader

I kinda like that first one. But my husband is a butcher and dead cows are kinda of old news. It's the live one with the creepy eyes that scares me.

September 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCarol

My 2 year old came and sat on my lap just as I was scrolling by the pink horse and to my amazement she squealed "Pink horsie!!!" ....I may have to make a wreck of my own!

September 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCaryn

I used to milk cows for a living, and let me tell you they are evil, stupid and dangerous creatures. The CCC nearly gave me a heart attack!

September 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLizzy Leigh

That second cow cake is actually really good....But it's so adorable that I would never meet it!

September 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBookworm

The fourth one looks almost like the Pantomime Horse from Monty Python. Key word here is almost.

September 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJess

That creepy CCC cow cake makes me shiver every time I look at it!
Enquiring minds wish to know- was the person who ordered the last cake implying that the person it was intended for is a horse's ass? Just wondering!
Keep up the good work, Jen! Wish you were touring Australia- maybe next time :-)

September 23, 2009 | Unregistered Commentercolleenoz

I think I love the horse butt cake. It's so wrong, but somehow so cute.

Am I the only one who thinks the second one is technically pretty well done for a CCC? (patooie!) That icing job on a sheet cake would get good reviews from me, but even that can't save a CCC. (patooie!)

September 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa

LOVE the pink pony's expression! What little girl doesn't dream of having a pony cake begging to not be eaten with their eyes at her birthday?

September 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMartha

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him cake.

Or am I just eating a dead horse?

September 24, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterredrall

Hey now, for a CCC, that cow face one is actually pretty good.

September 24, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterraw

The evil looking horse-like cake makes me think of Bad Horse from Dr. Horrible. I've had the song stuck in my head ever since I first looked at that cake.

September 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterApril

Either that cow has really bad teeth or he's eating a cupcake.

September 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I just thought you'd like to know that six malnourished horses were found in Baton Rouge Wednesday. The owners are in custody and the horses are undergoing treatment. So, a horse tragedy occurred, but there was a happy ending. Feel better?

September 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDanielle

love the pig!

September 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLucille Ball Jr.

Cool, I love Ree!

September 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterNicole

CupCakeCow's burning eyes are boring a hole through my soul. O_O *shiver*

September 24, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterWibble

I actually like the dead cow cake- maybe it'll be my birthday cake this year...

September 24, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterbkk

Maybe I'm a little bit nutty but I kinda like the cow head CCC. It looks pretty realistic... okay so yea thats creepy but still, points for realism.

September 26, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterdavid

The cake of the horse's backside ... the hooves are on backwards. They shouldn't be a "U" shape coming from what would be the front of the horse. You should only be able to see the back 1/2 of the hooves on each foot. So, either the blacksmith's an idiot, or the horse's legs have been broken and put back.

Love this blog, BTW!!

October 3, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Woo hoo! Beef cakes!

October 15, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAngie

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