Adowable Widdle Wrecks
October 1, 2009 Sometimes I see cakes that are so undeniably Wrecky that I'm almost ashamed of myself for thinking they're cute. I'm not sure how such a thing is possible, either - are they flukes? Slips of the piping bags? The inevitable result of a million Wreckerators working on a million cupcakes? The world may never know. Or care.
Who's a cute widdle turd!?**Follow-up from Jen: Puh-lease, "decontaminated"? It's just a little tetanus shot.
See? It's a cow. Or maybe ground beef. ("What do you call a cow with no legs, Alex?") Or Beef Stroganoff. ("A cow with noodles for legs?")
How can I tell it's a cow, and not a spotted dog with an awesome bouffant 'do sitting on a robot*? By reading the "moo" in the barren desert of cake board, that's how. [tapping temple] Skills. I gots 'em.
*Picture the nostrils as eyes for a minute - you'll see it. (Note: alcohol helps.)
Here's another one, fortified with rich, healthy irony:
An embarrassed skunk letting out a little toot, or a Wreckerator letting out a little workplace aggression? More importantly: which makes you hungrier?
Next is a real fluke; it's both the Wreckiest and the cutest cake for today:
A Wreckerator sets out to make a frog and ends up with a sloppy cross-eyed face with jowls, and yet it's still adorable? Now that's luck. (Dig the candle horns.)
And finally we have what appears to be a cross between a mutant rubber ducky and Angelina Jolie:
Sorry, sorry; I know that's kind of mean. I shouldn't malign rubber duckies like that.Thanks to Wreckporters Tim, Megan, Kristi M., Leigh S., and Linden S.!
- Related Wreckage: Hello, Kitty?
TOUR REMINDER: Hey, Chicago! Come see Jen and John tonight at the Barnes & Noble in Skokie (the Old Orchard Cener) at 7:30PM. It'll be fun. Promise.
Reader Comments (76)
My mom got my girls a 2 cupcakes drowing in icing "cake" that looked like a dog. Why bother with cake at all at this point? My girls would have liked it better if it was just a mountain of icing. Neither one of them touched the cupcake.
http://www.mysleepinghusband.com
Who's a cute widdle turd!?
Dang it, Jen, how am I supposed to explain to my boss the coffee spray all over my monitor this time?!?
Über-Disney Geek reminds you that John Lasseter got his Disney career start as a tour guide on the Jungle Cruise!
^..^
WV: matubs. "I needed six of matubs of maicing to frost macupcakes!"
I actually think the cow cake is really, really cute. Slightly wrecky, but well, we've definitely seen worse on this site.
Who orders a cake with a chicken that has lips!!!
Obviously something was lost in translation....
The first one looks more like an otter than a cat or lion. And why would a cat be sitting next to a river of sorts?
LOL @ Angelina Duckie! They should have included a pile of assorted baby rubber duckies trailing along behind.
Yeah, I know...I'm mean too.
I wonder if anyone before today has typed the words "Who's a cute widdle turd!?"
That seems like a pretty specific phrase.
Jen, I'm loving* the use of astricks in this post!!!
*far too many in one day for me count! :-)
Let us know when you're visiting the UK!
Even bakers should know that no one wants to eat downer cows.
Rubber ducky, you're the one
You make bath time lots of fun . . .
Hmm... the skunk looks suspiciously like a white kitty in a Batman mask.
The first one is definitely a beaver. I mean it's got a wide tail and is next to water. Gotta be it.
Oh my gosh!!! I am so glad I'm at home this morning! I busted out laughing so loud at the rubber ducky/Angelina Jolie cake that I think my neighbors probably heard me!!!
High Five girlfriend!!!
Eww! I stepped in monkey/kitten/lion cute and it's stuck to the bottom of my shoes! I'll just rinse them off in the toxic water.
The cow reminds me of Bambi's first steps. Only icingier.
At least the skunk has the grace to look embarrassed - he's even blushing.
Isn't the next one one of those aliens from "The Claw" from Toy Story?
Angelina-rubber-ducky? Fabulous!
WV: ismindw - Was this your cake? You shouldn't have walked away; ismindw!
the little stinky skunky is kinda cute.
the last one just quacks me up. who knew ducks had lips ... never mind collagen-injected ones. wonder if the doctor just put it on his bill?
waddle happen next? liposuction?
Is it just me, or did anyone else look at the first one and see a cuddly scorpion? The way it was all brown and that tail curled up behind, as if it's about to strike? No? Okay then.
I love the cute cow with barren desert (dessert? ha!) expanse of board.
I don't even recycle really, but the amount of plastic they put into the box holding the skunk offends me. It's two cupcakes for earth's sake and it gets fifty pounds of plastic wasted on it! Sheesh.
The Ducky looks more like Nadya Suleman to me!
OCTODUCK?
Wait, wait, wait. There are people who don't know what the Jungle Cruise is?!
Spidercow, spidercow!
Tries to walk, but he don't know how.
Melonie, I saw a scorpion in the first one, too! A very cuddly-faced scorpion, of course.
And thanks for making me spit out my coffee on my keyboard as I got to the rubby ducky with Angelina Jolie lips!
I find it a bit disturbing the way the cow is sort of... um... straddling the cake.
adnoxious.blogspot.com
ooh, my favorite website does a snark on Angelina, this day is looking better already. :)
p.s. and LOL on "spidercow" comment too!
Haha, I love the cow one!
Hm... fluffy and big eyes = cute even in the cake world.
This insanely-grinning frog with candle horns just made my day! But, its tongue is missing!!!
My three year old was sitting with me while I was reading your blog. When I got to the "Cow" cake he said.
"That cat looks like a monster."
That is all . . . .
Am I the only one who would be really happy to get the little green cake for my birthday? I was thinking he was just a cute monster.
P.S. Love the blog! I'm in Japan right now where everything is cute so wreckporting is hard. This site actually makes me miss Wal-Mart hehe.
OK why would anyone pay $9.99 for the rubber Angelina Jolie *charactor* cake?? What an insult!
On my first glimpse of the rubber duck, I saw two big flaming horns coming out of the top.
I then started thinking of how you could route tubes from a propane canister through a cake to the top of it to make giant flaming "candles" for dramatic effect. Perhaps mixed with tubes routing dry-ice smoke...
But alas, there are no horns. It was simply a reflection which confused my eye.
Do I detect a little Sarcasm? Wow, That's Original! (hehehe)
BTW Did you know you are featured in The Sun newspaper today?
http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/features/2662883/Bungling-bakers-are-shamed.html
P.S. I know you are stickler for grammar so I hope you won't mind me pointing out that you spelt "its" wrongly!
You did mean "wubber ducky," didn't you? No? More alcohol then, although I, too, lost what was left of my coffee by hooking up the duck with Angelina, frostiest cupcake this side of screendom.
ANGELINA JOLIE! ROFL LOL LOL ROFL
::pauses to wipe a tear::
ROFL LOL LOL ROFL
These are the best! "Ground" beef! ROFL
~Amy B
Interesting. Google Reader shows me that this entry was posted by John, but I saw all the comments directed at Jen and was perplexed. I looked on the entry itself; I can't find anything ON Cakewrecks that shows who posted it.
Several years ago we were doing the canoe "ride" at Disneyland. Now I say "ride" because it isn't one, there is no track and they actually expect you to paddle around that whole dang island yourself... anyways.. at one point the Cast Member calls out to the kids in the back "Do NOT splash each other. The water is green for a reason and you do NOT want that Reason on you!"
Now we need an irony font as well as a sarcasm font.
Good post John, "I really mean that".
I'm SO going to be with you guys in Skokie tonight! I'm more excited than I have any right to be.
I always heard the joke that beef stroganoff was a herd of cattle...um...uh...trying to keep this joke family friendly. Maybe it was noodles for legs after all. ;)
Ummm are you aware this blog steals your posts:
http://www.uk.search4eat.com/2009/10/01/adowable-widdle-wrecks/
I'm seeing a squirrel on the first one. Hammie, anyone?
FLMAOOOOOOOOOOO!!! angelina jolie HAhaha omg you crack me up! LOL
Cath,
DANG IT!!!!!
You got me. I read over this like 15 times and didn't catch it. It was buried in the middle.
But that's what you get when I write posts.
john
What do you call a cow with no legs?
It doesn't matter because he won't come anyways.
Ed Venture, who is too lazy to register
uhm that poor cow is humping the plate it's on...and the lippy duckyangelina thingy is just too >a loss of words<
The green face is perhaps an alien, as in Little Green Man from Mars. The candles look like antennas to me (what's plural of antenna?) Probably someone's already said this, but I'm short on time and can't read all the comments right now. Although I wish I could.
About the "rubber duck", my 7YO son said, "What is it, a chicken on top of a merry-go-round?"
the "skunk" reminds me of nibbler from futurama, which ups his cute factor by about 10 for me :)
on the last CW -- "character cakes"? What character is that? That little duck from the old Tom + Jerry cartoons with the ducky-sounding voice?
Can't wait to see you guys tonight!