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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Friday
Feb012013

Supper Bow Tie Optional

What's that? The Super Bowl is this weekend? WOOHOOO!!

That means it's time for the annual reappearance of...

 The Super Bowel!

GO, SUPER BOWEL! GO, GO, GO!

 

 Too much. A little too much.

 

In their continuing quest to use gingerbread cookie cutters for everything BUT gingerbread men, bakers have finally scored their most discomfiting design yet:

And just like that, every football phrase I know got dirty. o.0

 

Hey, ever wonder what wrecks will look like in the future?

Yeah. Me, neither.

 

My Roman numerals are a little rusty, but I'm pretty sure the W stands for 1.2 Gigawatts:

(That joke is funnier when you realize there IS no W in Roman numerals. Which means I had a good chortle when I looked it up just now.)

Seems to me bakers are better off leaving out the numbers all together. That way, they only have to focus on finding new mispellings for "bowl":

 

My new favorite. Does everyone have their supper bows on?

 

I know that professional sports have a way of dividing people against each other, so can we all just agree now that this mud pit with its two shrubberies is the REAL winner?

NI!

 

After all:

And actually, if you could just send the food my way in a doggie bag, that'd be awesome. (I have some Downton Abbey to catch up on.)


Thanks to Dan,  Cammy A., Carrie A., Grace, Elizabeth L., Jim K., Anna M., Sarah S., & Josie H. for remembering to include extra BBQ sauce with the pigs-in-a-blanket. 

« Chasing Shadows, Deja Vu Again | Main | An Indecent Proposal »

Reader Comments (76)

At the bakery I work at there is a lovely little sign that says "writing super bowl or NFL on a cake is copyright infringement, please be sure to only use the preapproved logos provided to you." Maybe this is their clever way of getting around the copyright infringement? Oh who am I kidding, too much faith in my fellow bakers.

February 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLizzi

The gingerbread men look like they're wearing Borat's swimsuit, but with some extra, um, greenery.

February 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterDillTheCat

Now you've done it. I laughed so hard, I scared the dog. *snerk* That gingerbread man... so... much... bad... *snort*

February 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterWendy

So how long has that TV flotsam on the cookie cake been gathering dust in storage? Couldn't help but notice there is a VCR under the TV . . .

February 1, 2013 | Unregistered Commenternepetacataria

@Sharyn ~ I'm sooooooo glad you're back! :-)
@mel ~ I'm totally telling my family "The history of the Super Bowel WLVI as told by mel" this weekend!
@SuBee ~ Happy Birthday!

Those gingerbread men are more than a little disturbing O.O
I want a cake like the last one. Honestly, since the Seahawks didn't make it I really don't care who is even playing. HAH! Like I would care if they were? The only sports I like to watch are the local high school football (Think Saturday Night Lights. One of our graduates even got drafted to the TN Titans!) or the ones my kids are playing.

Now everyone put on your Supper Bows and please pass the Death Weenies!!!

February 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJodee in WA

# 2 cake-->> the pig had a begining of skin cancer.
Maybe that's why they had Bows and not Bowls.

February 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKay

Gotta give that last cookie credit for honesty. Then again, I watch the Super Bowl for the commercials.

February 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterWaneta

@Sharyn: "process of elimination"...and you think my puns are groaners....(nicely done)....and thank you for your kind words...I feel flushed...
@SuBee: we here in the midwest are a little more modest than people from, oh, some more avant- garde states, like Colorado, for example, so we really don't keep track of "any time someone scores," so I'll just wish you a very Happy Birthday now, and hope that my sincerity will make up for my lack of frequency.....
@Andrea and @Shannon: thank you!
@SusanD: thank you ...ironically, most of it is true....
@Haiku Joy: you are so welcome...and glad to have you back...you are an eagerly anticipated player on this playground....
@Jodee in WA: hahaha...I'd suggest you do it with a running start.....

February 1, 2013 | Unregistered Commentermel

@ SuBee Happy Birthday !!!!

February 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterEla

Love the Monty Python references. Thank you for making me smile today.

February 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMaggi

Don't laugh, being a Were #1 is a terrible fate: every full moon, a friend of a friend of mine turns into a giant numeral.

February 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAlverdine

Jen, if you actually love us (or even like us a teensiest bit), please don't ever post it if you find a Souper Bowel (horrified shudder). For some reason, that's how I read it for the first two and it grossed me out.

Happy birthday, SuBee!! :D
I hope you ate the cake by yourself. I would have thrown it in a particular direction and, because I actually know a teensy bit out football, I'd have timed it for an important play.

At least the gingerbread man can score with himself. o.O

The shrubbery cake may not be wrong. I can't quite imagine it but perhaps when it was fresh it were #1.
(unless those are pompons. then it's just WRONG)

mel, I lament when you are absent and rejoice when you pun. :D

What do paramedics in Rome call an IV? (giggle-snort)

thankfully Kim in ID asked African or European- how'd the rest of you miss that, hmmm?

February 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara Anne

WLVI is the call letters for a TV station in Massachusetts. Don't think they'll be airing the Super Bowl, though.

If you eat during the most recent episode of Downton, try to finish those leftovers before it's halfway through. Keep wine and tissues handy!

February 1, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterpikkewyntjie

A super bow is the 11th Doctor's bow tie. Which explains the thing in the center of that cookie cake; It's a alien trying to look like a football.

Bow ties are cool.

February 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJabby

@ mel: Thanks for telling another marvelous yarn! I love puns so bad that they hurt.

The gingerbread man just had me snorting. I mean, really: a two-prong dong with a green hula skirt? It looks like a self-contained porn movie, all wrapped up in a sweet little package.

And I've got to hand it to whoever ordered the utterly honest cookie. For many years, I watched only for the commercials because the game was such a blowout.

@SuBee, my son shares your grief. He was born a day before the 1995 Super Bowl. Birthday celebrations have gotten a bit easier since they now play the Pro Bowl the week before the Super Bowl.

I still remember that Super Bowl Sunday after he was born. There were a lot of births that weekend, so it was pretty noisy on the floor. I was watching the game and holding my son, when I heard the most whiny, annoying noise being repeated over and over again. I couldn't figure out what it was, and I couldn't get out of bed to look around for it. Finally, I saw the light -- on TV. It was a Pepsi commercial, and someone was stranded in the desert in front of a Pepsi machine that wouldn't take the person's only dollar, so he kept trying again and again to feed it into the machine. NOT a good scenario for a hormonal/exhausted woman in pain. Thank God for the drugs!

February 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterTLC

Super bow!!! Yeah the 11th doctor bow tie is super cool.
And I think I saw the FSM in the next one. It has been touched by his noodlely appendage.
Not sure how to take my son not knowing what the Super Bowl is.... I know next year when he is in 6th grade the football coach will want him.... He is already 5'6" and 190 lbs.... 3 inches taller than me. Nerds raising nerds.... Sports is not in our blood.

February 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterShalin

Well now I have even more reason to dislike gingerbread men lol. Also makes me happy to not have any tv at all except what I can see online..no super anything for me unless I sneak in to a friends house steal all the hot wings and run home.. hmm sounds like a plan and a great way to avoid cakes hehe.

February 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

Hey @mel, apparently Washington is also a more avant-garde state. I, however, don't keep track of how often people score either. o.O I'll be sure to hide behind the food table when I tell the tale. Nobody will be willing to knock over the bean dip to get me, right?

@Barbara Anne ~ My brother and sister-in-law were on their way to a football game the morning I had my oldest child. They had the nerve to continue on their merry way to watch one of the worst games in history. I will never let my brother live that down. But I'm not bitter! ;-)

Did anyone see the thing on Yahoo News about how this year they're calling Mardi Gras "Super Gras"? They even have extra wreckorators coming in to make lots of king cakes! Totally made me think of CW! I wonder if instead of babies they are going to put little football players inside? Somebody in New Orleans PLEASE send Jen a picture of a Super Gras King Cake! My morbid curiosity really wants to see that!

February 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJodee in WA

#1...Yet another case of make us dizzy, on the ceiling cake...

#2...Chilli dip to the right, dessert on the left...

#4...Wreckerator was supposed to be adding music notes to those lines but had an ADD moment!

#6...Ran out of frosting....snagged some astro turf from the mini golf play center next door...

Go Dodgers!!! (They always win the super bowel in my book)

February 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMeg

Were #1!! Obviously the cheerleader threw down her pompoms and exited the cake in disgust.

And cake #2...yeah, that says it all.

February 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterVon

So wouldn't it have made sense to ice the gingerbread men like they were football players, refs, or fans? A ref wouldn't need much more than the stripes, right? And then just ice or pipe jerseys on the others and don't worry about the pants or helmets. And oh no - I'm being all hopeful for humanity again, dang it.

February 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

Third-(or fourth, I've lost count)ing the WLVI confusion. Every time I saw the Super Bowl XLVI logo last year, I thought it looked wrong. Wonder if that cake was made in or around Boston.

February 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterEileen

Downton Abbey FTW! mel, fabulous story!

February 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterCheryl

"mud pit with its two shrubberies" LOL!! The dialogue with the photos makes me laugh more than the cakes

February 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

1.21 gigawatts reminds me that if Professor Brown can make a super time traveling car, imagine the fast moving football he could make! Super Ball WLVI!

February 5, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterDelia from Detroit

Lol! I actually laughed out loud at the Monty Python reference. Thank you for cheering up a dull Saturday afternoon at work!

February 9, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSLB

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