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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Friday
Jul152011

A Harry Situation

My friends, today marks a tragic milestone for Harry Potter fans.

It's the day I feature more Harry Potter wrecks.

Ten points from Bakingdor!

And you're to stay after class and chop up every single High School Musical cellphone deco kit.

'Cuz I hate those things.

Here's a positively dizzying array of wreck:

See that photo of the little girl under the cake? She's wearing the same expression I had when *I* first saw this cake: confused, disappointed, and slightly nauseated.

I'll give you a hint on this next one:

It's a golden snitch.

To be fair, maybe it's supposed to be the one Harry spit out.

I'm sorry, but I have to bring back two old favorites:


Eat your heart out, Daniel Radcliffe.

Or maybe just your unfortunately rendered underbite.


Don't you hate it when your Quidditch cakes turns into Harry Potter and the Deathly Gallows?

Tsk, tsk. Such a noose-ance.

EVERYONE REMAIN CALM.

This is not Hedwig:


It's Ron's owl, Pigwidgeon.

Who is a total square.

And finally, while I know not everyone out there loves Harry Potter as much as I do, at least we can all agree on one thing:

There is about to be some SERIOUS nerd rage going on in here.

Thanks to Emily R., Jackie N., Char M., Rebecca J., Erin M., Jesse D., & Michelle M., who think Team Lupin vs Team Snape would work. You know, because of Snape's sparkling personality.

« Wreckies of the Month | Main | john (the hubby of Jen) In The Flesh »

Reader Comments (103)

I've been wondering for a while now what would happen if someone asked a bakery for a Harry Potter-Doctor Who cake... My birthday is commoing up, maybe I should try that...
-Μαρία Βάγκνερ

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Anxiously awaiting your review of HP! Surely you and John were there at midnight!

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJennifer

"Ten points from Bakingdor!" Oh, my sides hurt & my mouthful of beverage is across the room. (Note to self: never ingest food or drink be*fore* reading Cake Wrecks.)

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterflying gargoyle

HOW DARE THEY!!! Those cupcakes must DIE!

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermimi

It's funny you metion Team Snape versus Team Lupin... MTV did a Harry Potter World Cup where they pitted 64 Potterverse characters against each other. The last one standing, as a matter of fact, was Snape.

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterunseeliepixie

That owl cake is actually kind of adorable. In a weird, squished-face way (kind of like Pig then!).

The cupcakes, however, are entirely irredeemable. Who's the baker we have to Avada Kedavra for that hot mess?

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBriony

@Donkaloosa -- Sirius Black gives Ron a tiny owl named Pigwidgeon at the end of Prisoner of Azkaban.

WV: bacom

Bacom, let-us and toe-mater sammitches for lunch!

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

ZOOMOM
I thought it said TEAM COWARD TOO!!!

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

It might be just me, but I was wondering what "Team Coward was" and then I realized. Damn you Old English font!

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBryna

Phrase I'm going to work into conversation today, as many times as possible: seething pile of nerd rage.

Thanks! :)

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermichelej

@Donkaloosa, clearly you've never read book 4, because Pigwidgeon IS Ron's owl. Errol was never Ron's owl, he was the family owl.

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLaura

Ha! I thought the third one was supposed to be one of those killer balls from the movie Phantasm!

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMike

Why is Harry in the Gulf of Mexico?

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTJ

@Donkaloosa:

Errol is the Weasleys' family owl and Ron did use it to send his mail.
But then he got a teeny, tiny owl of his own: Pigwidgeon.
I can't quite recall who gave it to him, though.

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMafdet

I was completely full of nerd-rage because the bakery had a sign over the Harry Potter flotsam cakes that said "Harry Potter and the Deadly Hallows". I complained to the mgr (who is a friend) and even though he laughed at me, the sign got changed! Nerd victory.
(Oh, and @Donkaloosa... although Errol was the Weasley family owl, Pigwidgeon was Ron's owl, given to him by Sirius after he exposed Ron's pet rat Scabbers as an imposter.)

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBec

I want to know why the "decorators" insist on putting 3 oranges vulcanos in HP cakes. The action occurs in the UK!! Do they even have vulcanos there? And in the case that they have....theres is no vulcano in the books!! or the movies!!

And the mashup cupcakes must die. NOW.

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The last movie may have hit theaters, but there is still the DVD release to look forward too.

Yeah that Owl is pretty cute, especially if you go with the old english definition of Ugly but interesting.

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterOrual

Anonymous @1:18 - Can I make that cake for you? Please, please, please? I'll make a Tardis with Harry, Hermione and Ron peeking out of it. :) Or maybe Harry pointing his wand at the Doctor pointing his sonic screwdriver? Or...Or....the possibilities are endless! Endless I tell you!!

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterFerralyn

I believe the owl is officially Epcot.

Or Spaceship Earth... I can never tell.

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

When Edward dumped Bella, she curled up in a ball and stayed like that until he took her back. When Ron dumped Hermonie, she kept on trying to defeat the darkest wizard of all time.

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Crying into my butterbeer.

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterensouling

@Donkaloosa.

Errol is the Weasley's family owl, Ron's owl is Pigwidgeon.

Nerd fail.

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Poor Harry.

And maybe the baker was going for a Team HP / Team Twilight theme for a birthday party / starting zone of some war. Maybe.

I hope we see some Potter sweets soon. These wrongs need righting. Like ASAP.

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterhownottogame

Hey, no dissing my man Snape! He's the hero. If you want "sparkling personality," see Gilderoy.
~ June, member of Team Snape

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterjunewilliams7

For the second cake - I thought you were pointing out the wicked-witch-of-the-ease-leg-placement photo.

Re mixed cupcakes - can't we all just get along? ;) (I'm team Feist tho...)

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterS

Oy. That last one...how does anybody get confused between Harry/Ron and Edward/Jacob? Unless they haven't seen a movie poster for 10 years? I convinced my (non-HP-fan) BF that we should watch Goblet of Fire for 2 reasons:
1. The 10th Doctor is the Big Bad.
2. Edward Cullen dies.

WV: ancetase The next big thing in artificial sweeteners! Ancetase: Zero calories, very little chance of developing toenail cancer!

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMonica

Fail... EPIC fail on that last one. WOW

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterljwmomma

hmmm...those poor cupcakes. To be fair, Robert Pattinson WAS in Harry Potter, but...

And as for the snitch, I was seriously thinking that that was something that someone hacked up...

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterPvtSam75

okay, first off, quit showing that horrific Harry cake.

second, what the eff is going on with Jackie's cake? what are the three lumps in the bottom left corner?? it looks like a dragon had a disappointing bowel movement.

third, anyone who doesn't know Hedwig was snowy white needs to leave the blog NOW! (seething nerd rage spills over to another cake...breathe, breathe, breathe...I stopped liking JK Rowling when Hedwig had her last scene!!)

10 points from Bakindor. OMG, I will totally use that this weekend and beyond. :D

@Μαρία Βάγκνερ- that's just AWESOME. @Ferralyn- you must make it and Jen must post it. Someone needs to be wearing a fez- I vote for Snape or a Dalek! muahahahahahaha

-Barbara Anne

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

And I thought the snitch was a bakugan :p

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMel

@ cake #5:
oh, poor harry. it looks like he's doing the dance called http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BsnIENkwDnM" rel="nofollow">the cramp from the end of the spongebob episode "slimy dancing."
-your 12 yr old reader kate

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

LOVE the cupcake mashup!!

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterChandanista

wait, am I the only one who thinks cake #2 looks a lot like cake #2 in http://cakewrecks.blogspot.com/2009/07/this-should-even-things-out.html" rel="nofollow">this post? this looks suspiciously like a case of harry potter deco kits! When I see what looks like like people who either haven't seen/read hp stuff making deco kits for hp cakes, I will officially lose all hope for humanity. Let's just hope they don't start making them into *gasp*...
CCC'S!!!

-your gloriously geeky tween reader kate

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I laughed at all of them until I got to the final one, which I received with a cry of, "YOU BASTARDS!"

Then I realized this must be the nerd rage to which you referred.

Still. They're jerks. (However, I do love the Hurry Purrturr cake.)

July 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKim

All I can say is blech to most of those especially the second cake. What on earth is it for I can't tell if Harry is flying or drowning in a sea of dispare. Lol at the twilight reference on the cupcakes.

July 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

SNAPE4LYFE! Padfoots don't try to step to this.

July 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSlySevSteph

That's supposed to be an owl? I thought it was a Gizmo cake.

http://gadgets.boingboing.net/gimages/a3bd_gremlins_gizmo_plush.jpg

July 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKaren C

Oh, how I love your blog! Makes my day to see other people's fails! Love the "Gold Snitch".

July 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKennedy

Can I be on Team Snape-Would-Beat-The-Crap-Out-Of-Any-Twilight-Loser-Because-He's-So-Stinking-Cool-And-Uber-Sexy? Because that would be my team. :D

July 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLinelei

Isn't that the Flying Spaghetti Monster on the gallows cake?

July 17, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I still LOVE everything about that purple & green repeat of Harry's head, except of course Harry's head. The rest is so awesome!

July 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

It's the three orange volcanoes again!!

July 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Oh no, the Fingeroo eyeballs came back! I thought they went into hibernation in mid-May!

wv - mimons. I'd better start setting up my anti-Fingeroo fences right away. It usually takes mimons!

July 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH THE CUPCAKES.

Nerd rage indeed.

July 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKayna

Take the "noose" cake, rotate 180 degrees. Not only do you have your proper Quidditch rings (even though there aren't enough), you also have Plastic Harry about to faceplant into the ground.

July 21, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTansunn

How dare they combine Harry Potter with Twilight? Does that cake decorator have any decency?

July 21, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLeah

@Anonymous 7/15 1:18am
Had a similar thought about the beautiful Snitch truffles in the Sweets after this--"Edible ball bearings!" ; )

July 27, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKiwi

I love Harry Potter. Professor Snape, especially. Who in the world added the 'e' after Slytherin? LMAO! And.........what's with the Twi-Potter cupcakes? *cringes*

August 11, 2011 | Unregistered Commenter~C

I can understand that a lot of people here are judging these cakes without any REAL decorating knowledge themself and fine. To each their own, but the "underbite" cake is actually very beautiful. Harry himself is not so good. But it is freehand and better than anything anyone else here could do. The writing, the decoration, the airbrush, the glitter and the borders. It's really beautiful.

August 20, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSam

I could have sworn that golden snitch one was a bludger!

September 14, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCourtney

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