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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Friday
Jan072011

Cheat Sheet Cakes

"Excuse me, but what is this cake supposed to be?"

"That? That's a princess tiara, of course."

"Seriously? Wow. I never would've got that. Uh. Thanks."

....

"Sorry to bother you again, but could you tell me what this icing blobby bit here is?"

"It's a telephone."

"And this one over here?"


"That's a poodle."

"And that?"

"Tank covered in butterflies."

"I...see. Thanks."

.........


"Hi again. I was just wondering...."

*sigh* "Look, lady, do I have to label everything in this bakery for you?"

[brightening] "Oooh, if you wouldn't mind..."

"FINE."







(If you're thinking this is getting a little ridiculous, just wait.)

Theeeere it is.

Thanks to MWD, Sandi G., Joshua L., Betsy N., Ed P., and Nicole P., who know better than to believe everything they read. (That's obviously Oscar. [head tilt] Or maybe Rizzo.)

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Reader Comments (88)

Argh!!!!! Recursive cakery! Won't this cause an endless loop in the software, resulting in ((cupcake) to the nth power) cake)?!! Now I know why all those birds and fish died--they gorged themselves to death on the impending infinite cupcake doom. It really IS the end of the world, all because one baker just couldn't stick with misshapen monkeys and footballs...

WV: reosyc EX. Those birds got reosyc on all that cake.

January 7, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTexpenguin

Ohmygosh! YES that tiara (I'm sorry "princess crown") totally looks like text-book illustrated fallopian tubes! And that poor ear-less teddy bear...poor poor teddy.

January 7, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterscbeachchik

I'm surprised the school bus cake has only two visible wheels; give up the sudden and selective concern for perspective and one could have gotten 2 more chocolate cupcakes into the, and I use the word loosely, design.

This labelled ccc (patooie!) also makes me think of the day I was stuck in downtown city traffic behind a large yellow school bus. I suddenly realized the black painted lettering on the back door spelled EMERGENY EXIT DOOR. School motto had to be "We can't teach your kids to spell but in the event of a crash we'll get them out!"

January 7, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterNightNurse

Seriously, that looks about as much like Kermit the Frog as I do! (And no, I'm not green.)

January 7, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterShelly C.

As someone who worked in grocery store's bakery/deli while in college, I can totally see how these happened.

Manager: Could you label today's new bakery items? [Meaning, put the bar code labels on the packaging - they arrived without]

Disaffected Assistant: Labels? [slurp] whaddoya mean?

Manager: Get yer finger out of the icing bucket and pay attention. Label the bakery goods that arrived today so the customers know what they are.

Disaffected Assistant: Oooh. [Looking at the pastry bag in his finger-licked hand as light bulb clicks on] Okay.

January 7, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSoupAddict Karen

Kermit doesn't look like himself anymore.

The Giant Cookie one was freaking hilarious.

January 7, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLizzyBean

Thank you for making me laugh every post! :))

January 7, 2011 | Unregistered Commentertechgator

Why does that poor bear have no ears?! It would have only taken 2 more cupcakes!

January 7, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDiane

I haven't baked a cake in like 20 years, but seriously, I could do better!

January 7, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

that "teddy bear" (intentional quotes of sarcasm) looks more like a concerned gingerbread man... and I'm VERY glad they clarified the Kermit... I would never have guessed it!

wv: phongyb: the filter that bakeries put on their phones rendering all orders as bizarre gibberish to be traslated however they choose.

January 7, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterNikki

I loved the Giant Cookie! I would totally do that if I thought I could get away with it at work.

I seriously have at least one person every week ask me "Where are your giant cookies?"

The sad thing is that the cookies are in the first section and the top shelf of the bakery.

Maybe they'd notice the giant cookies if I labeled them...or not.

January 7, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I honestly thought that "Kermit" was a green-feathered, white-beaked bird.

January 7, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

i would've thought the giant cookie would be obvious.

January 7, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterarchersangel

Too funny this blog! I love it.

January 7, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterEating With Hudson

Remarkably strange - all those labels are spelled correctly!

January 7, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterilze

To be fair, most school buses I've seen do in fact say "School Bus" on the side.

January 7, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterPlangkye

I have one word for the last one: Sleestack.

January 7, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterlizzied

WTF????

January 7, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

It's a good thing that the frog was labeled Kermit, because no one who has ever seen the "real" (cute!) Kermit, would guess that's who it's supposed to be.

January 7, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCarol

"Giant Cookie" - what? If you have to label it, probably time to rethink your career choice.

January 7, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterdeb

Why does that "tiara" look like it wants to put a stranglehold on anyone that dares even try to cut into it? And scary though it is I thought that "frog" looked like a pac man gone awry lol.

January 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

Actually, that supposed "Kermit" cake looks a lot more like Audrey II...FEED ME, SEYMOUR!

January 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterPirka

ha, if some of those weren't labeled, they wouldn't be cakes: they would be Rorschach tests!

January 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLaura

Teddy's got no ears!!!!

He's got NO EARS!!!

No EARS!!!!!!!!

Oh no!!! Who could be so cruel as to chop teddy's ears off?

Poor teddy - we'll all need years of therapy after seeing him in that pathestc state......

January 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The tiara is actually well done.
Kermit the frog had me laughing!!!!
Love Kermit, but that looked more like a lizard and the tongue!!!

January 8, 2011 | Unregistered Commentertiny purple elephant

Kermit is definitely doing something naughty!

wv: shede: the act of making lewd and inappropriate illustrations in cake art; demonstrating questionable morality with icing (i.e.: what is in Kermit's mouth?)

January 8, 2011 | Unregistered Commentersalamandermuse

this is hilarious. also funny: http://justsomepetpeeves.wordpress.com!!!

January 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

At least "Kermit" seems to be appropriately medicated.

January 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKimberly Chapman

Oh yes, firefly.... mourn mourn. Love the cake though

January 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The first cake I ever decorated, I was 12...it consisted of candy bears I stuck to the cake and piped balloons that they were each holding....even THAT looked better than a lot of these cakes! Wow.

January 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Its a cupcake cupcake cake!

January 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Where's the one that says "CAKE"?

January 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterEuryale69

Aren't those school bus wheels just too darned *cute*? That cake cracks me up!

January 12, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBoy George

Kermit the Frog?? more like Kermit the Forg. <---reference to one of the estest ever Sesame Street skits ever!

January 15, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermandy_Reeves

Haha, the teddy bear looks like a Chewbacca gingerbread man.

January 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterHester

A CUPCAKE made out of CUPCAKES? In a CAKE? That's so meta.

January 26, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I love that school bus! I could just imagine someone at that grocery store bakery had been watching ACE OF CAKES and felt inspired to kick up his game a little at work. =D

On the other hand, the person who created that blue soft-shell-crab- looking princess tiara could might want to consider catching a couple of episodes of ACE OF CAKES! Lest I jest...I'm sure a lot of love went into the making of that cake. Not so sure about the Kermit one, though.

And if Andy Warhol had labeled that giant cookie "Giant Cookie" it'd be on display at The Museum of Modern Art.
Sad, but true!

January 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBhakti

That kermit blew me away

August 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAbigail

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