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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Friday
Jan082010

Funny Business

NOTE: Getteth thine kiddies hence! (Translation: today's post is not for the youngun's!)

These clowns seem pretty excited about their cupcakes.


No, I mean really excited.


No, no. I mean REALLY excited.

"Oh! Uh. Hi, guys. Heheh. So, what's up?

"What are we doing? Who - us? Uh...nothing? Yeah, nothing. Nothing at all. Sooo....yeah. Listen, can you close that door again on your way out? And turn the Jimmy Buffett CD back on? Thanks. Yeah. You, too. Ok, then. Bye!"

"So I says to her, 'hey, baby, don't let the tiny clown car fool you; it's not the way you throw the cream pie, it's the way you put the tutu on the dog!' And she was all, 'What?' and I was like, 'never mind.' Yeah."

And then, just when you thought it couldn't get any worse...

Something like this comes along:

Whatever you do, DO NOT click on this picture to see it full size. Srsly. Don't do it.

[whistling]

Ok, now that you've clicked on the picture to see it full size - care to join me in a "I could've gone my whole life without seeing clown tinkle toys" scream? Groovy.

AAAAAAUUUUGGGHHH!!

Keith R., Will B., Jane O., Amy F., & Nicole V., I nominate "tinkle toys" as the new clown-bits euphemism for 2010. Any seconds?

- Related Wreckage: Coulrophobia Cakes

Note: The tinkle toys in the last picture were supposed to be buttons. Pink buttons.

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Reader Comments (265)

:.O

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I think we have a new catchphrase ... humping clown cupcakes ...

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTía Hillary

I look forward to the years of therapy it will take for me to recover from this incredibly disturbing post.

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterksaldria

>_< Oh no.

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Speeding Turtle

Oh, oh! I know this one! Ok, the wreckerator is clearly a frustrated artist working in a bakery...so he (or she) has merged icing and art in a hideous, coulrophobia inducing interpretation of Dali's famous "Persistence of Time" painting.

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKylie

OMG hahahahahaha

that was good

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJessica

I now have a desperate desire to attempt to secrete ummm... pink buttons on all the cakes I make.

It would have made that echidna cake for the 4yr old's birthday even more amusing.

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAriane

Oh. My. God.

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKara

I thought they were naughty balloon animals. Either way -- creepy!!

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterEco

What? No ethnic diversity in tinkle toys? Unthinkable. :P

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterPixelgoddess

I'm trying to figure out how to bleach those images clean out of my brain. Who in their right mind would...oh, I just spotted the mistake in THAT assumption. And as for the nudie clown horrors, did anyone else notice the giant gummie "worm" on the upper right hand dessert??

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTrista

Never have liked clowns. Never. I feel validated.

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

WHY... why... why?
At least you helped my new year resolution, no cupcake will ever go in my mouth again without thinking if that! What do you know- cured of cupcakes!!

...but still afraid of evil clowns

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterEmme

I forgot about Saturdays. But looking over the clown post will keep me going until tomorrow.

Enjoy your day!!!

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

"Note: The tinkle toys in the last picture were supposed to be buttons. Pink buttons."

...lol, I want to believe you so bad!

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMrs. Dude

It must be colder on the left side of that bakery.

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterjillb-ilslp

By the way, have a great day off, Jen and John! (And I hope you don't moderate this until at least Sunday! We want your day off to truly be a day OFF! Love you guys!)

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterjillb-ilslp

You're upset about the tinkle toys (love that by the way!) and you didn't notice the slimy turd cake in the background, well now we know what it takes to get your attention!! (wink! Love ya Jen!)

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSandyPie

When I saw the last pic, my reaction must have been quite the sight because my husband, very alarmed, goes, "baby, are you okay?!"

hah.

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTwirly McSwirl

"It's the way you put the tutu on the dog!"

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterI Love Baby Quilts!

Please tell me the cupcakes on which the three REALLY excited clowns are lying were not cream filled.

Tom

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

you can call it a button if you want to but that's not what I'd call it/them/whoosit.

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMargaret

These cupcakes were made for the Dillon Edwards Investment Company, don't you know?

http://www.tressugar.com/1965732

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDwain

I feel like I need to bleach my brain... that is so disturbing!

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAimee

Okay, that's just disturbing. Funny, but disturbing! :D

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRachel

What has happened to the PG blog? It's getting more and more risque and really is a shame.

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

AAAAIIIIEEEEEEE!!!! As if I wasn't clown-phobic already . . .

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJill M.

Buttons?! yeah...funny buttons. *lmao*

WV: repprat: let me repprat: don't click to see the full size picture.

D'oh! I forgot actually enter my first WV. Let me try again.

2nd WV: desses

Desses the funniest clown button I've ever seen

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKathleen

Now I know why my daughter has a clown phobia! Karen

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKaren

o_O

WV: menta

Whoever made these clown cakes, especially the cupcakes, were absolutely "menta".

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

See, now, this is why I hate clowns!!! They're just scary---and I'm 45 years old!!!

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Clown... hehehehehe... tinkle... *snort* toys... BAHAHAHAHAHAHA! This was so terrifying, but so hilarious! Thanks, so very much! This absolutely made my day!

-"Bess"

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

i am so stinking JEALOUS. some wreckspotters have all the luck! you'd think in kentucky we'd have some spectacular cake atrocities (or at least some spelling mistakes) but oh, no; the worst thing i see when i troll the wal*mart bakery is a shih tzu cake or poo icing.
kelly

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Excellent. On top of that, my wv is "dingly"

January 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

No wonder clowns are so happy all the time.......

January 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda

Bonnie sez:
"so how x-rated would it be to eat one of those things anyway?"

It's a moot question, because to do that, I'd have to be in the same room with one of them, and that ain't gonna happen.

January 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGary

Clowns, on the whole, are scary. I don't need clowning on my cake. Clowny cakes are fine, because there are no clowns in sight, but when it comes to this, it is just... no!

January 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commentershikishinobi

"Mommy, do I have to eat the icing? I just like the cake part."

Joy, St. Louis, MO

January 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterUntamed Shrew

Humping clown cupcakes....wow.

I can't even begin to figure out what these people are thinking- kinda makes you wonder what kind of background music they play in their bakery?

Va-va-va-voom!

YEEE-IKES!

January 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

You are ridiculous. Definitely adding Tinkle Toys to my daily vocabulary.

January 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterummmmheyyyy

I did it... I clicked on the picture... And now I must go bleach my corneas and poke out my Third Eye with a Spork. But I DID laugh really hard.

January 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnn

Wow. Someone managed to find a way to make clowns more terrifying.

January 11, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSiriusSchwartz

The first clown looks like he is doing hokey pokey on his cupcake..poor thing hes gonna have some major back issues!

January 12, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLauren Borquez

Can't sleep...clown'll flash me. Can't sleep...clown'll flash me.

January 12, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSexy Sadie

Please make this a Cake Wrecks Classic for easy reference! Every time my daughter and I need to laugh REALLY hard we check out this post.

The "buttons" on those clown cupcakes = a serious cry for help!

January 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMikenjane

Thanks, now when asked whether or not I have seen a clown sprawled provocatively across a cupcake I can respond, with all confidence, yes, yes I have.

January 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMoreCowbellPlease23

My 8 year old daughter was looking over my shoulder when I scrolled down to these. She asked me "Mom, are those girl clowns or boy clowns?" I nearly choked on my coffee!!! Then, she simply said, "They must be boy clowns" and walked away!!!!!

January 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterHayley

It's a week later and this thing is still haunting me!

January 19, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSexy Sadie

The visual imagery of children licking those, uh, buttons is just beyond disturbing. Do you suppose that's what the sicko "decorators" had in mind?

Shivering,

January 20, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRenaLynne

Glad for the pink buttons explanation. At first it crossed my mind, why put the fig leaves on the FEET?

January 22, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

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