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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Thursday
Jun042009

Weird Wedding Cakes

You could argue that some of these aren't exactly Wrecks, but they're just too "good" not to share.

Don't you hate it when the cake eavesdrops, Anne L.?

Here's an oldie but a goodie from Kristen R.:

The alien armada, coming in for a landing.

Inmagine is a stock photo site, so here's hoping this is a joke, Emily S. Or maybe an ad for Big Love? (Gorgeous cake, though, huh?)

I can forgive many things, Dawn M., but forgetting to ice the cake is not one of them.

And here's another classic, found by Lynna at World's Ugliest Wedding Cakes, I believe:

Wow. Remember when Beanie Babies were such a great investment, because their value could only increase? Kind of like our houses four years ago? (Oh, SNAP, economy.) Yeah. Those were good times.

Tune in tomorrow for part two, because oh yes, there are more.

« And Now, MORE Weird Wedding Cakes | Main | Cake Wrecks, World Educator »

Reader Comments (143)

When i saw the first cake, i wanted to laugh while asking my self.Why it was nnede to be like that?! lol..;D Now i know base on the tittle, "Weird Wedding Cakes" haha.. Thanks for sharing.Have a great weekend.;D

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June 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSolo

Judy said Okay I found the wedding site where those red cake monstrosities came from.

Well, at least seeing that answered the question of just how many people they were expecting at the reception: a lot!

June 5, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjackie31337

Cake 1: How in the world do they get that to not fall over?

Cake 5: Owie! Should have had a sunglasses warning! Next time, they should make sure the wreckerator isn't a stoned hippie with an airbrush.

June 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterFelixAndAva

Why would multiple people in a successful relationship with each other be a joke, exactly?

June 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Yes, I think the beehive cake is iced as well, just camouflaged with a dusting of some sort to resemble a skep.

And to Anonymous from Germany: I've had baked goods from your neck of the woods (or wald) and let me just say give me German torte/cakes any day over most of the stuff that passes for "cake" in the US. No offense to most of you US pros, but even a fancy decorated cake is just artwork unless it tastes wonderful. I can count on one hand the number of times I've had memorably good cake here.

Best cake I've ever eaten in my life: a roadside restaurant in Dingle Bay, Ireland. I'd sell my soul for the recipe.

June 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMichelle S.

I have to say, once you get past the idea that the bee cake isn't frosted, it's actually quite beautiful and a very clever idea. I say that because I love bees, and I love honey. To diopsideanddiamonds, it doesn't really look like poo. It looks like what it is, a skep. When you see it, think of Pooh, not poo. Bee-sides, sometimes, cake is better tasting without frosting, and I am imagining right now, that cake made with my absolutely delicious rum-cake recipe....mmmmmmmm ;)
Erin G.

June 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

That ferris wheel cake...Mama Mia! Just how many people was that intended to feed? A small nation?

June 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBelle Epoque

"French for "albino booby tower".:

naaahahahahahaaaaa, totally dying here

June 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterShay

I really like the first cake - I think although it's not exactly pleasing to the eye, it does show creativeness on the part of the couple and the cake is well decorated considering it's leaning tendency. Perhaps it's providing cover for the kissing couple haha...

June 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJo

It's a crime to not ice a cake, so I'm really hoping the beehive cake is iced and then dusted with cinnamon to make it look more realistic (if that's how you want to describe it).

June 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Please put "albino booby tower" on a t-shirt. It's almost as good as "falker satherhood".

June 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

the cakes are only as crazy as the person who pays after they see them!! btw i think the bee cake is iced, but then coated with brown sugar or cake crumbs to give a real look to the hive? the red cake scares me, i fear sleep. all i can think is red room red room red room.

June 6, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

man, the 1st one would have been nice if the cake was standing straight up and down. so sad

June 6, 2009 | Unregistered Commenteradrienne

omg,i have socks that look like that tie-dye cake!!

June 6, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCrazyFrog

I liked the bee hive cake, but I think they should have used a bee hive colored frosting rather than leaving it naked... also, the butterflies hanging out seem kind of out of place. *shrug*

June 7, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBRIT!

#3: Really? That's considered a wreck?
Are there going to be cakes for same-sex weddings posted too? Interracial weddings?

June 7, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The un-iced cake would be great as a beehive. It'd be perfect there.

http://www.inmagine.com/rbv012/rbv0120640-photo
That site also has creative uses for those ditzy plastic toppers.

June 7, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterVellum

Hey Anonymous,

Yeah, cuz polygamy is EXACTLY like same-sex or interracial marriages.(/sarcasm)
Btw, how's life on the compound these days? I hear the new electric fence is keeping the runaway-bride problem down to a bare minimum. But, you know, that's JUST LIKE mixed-race or gay marriage... so s'all good.

(Waits to see if John will let this comment through...XD)

so many cute and interesting wedding cakes. wow...

June 8, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterqiufen

Not convinced that #3 is a wreck. In the US, polygamy is often mentally associated with cultish religious behaviour. But it's a valid choice when everyone involved is a consenting adult. Wreckfail, in my opinion.

June 8, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterlittleravenshop

I asked my four year old what he thought of the first cake and he says, "Horny!"
After recovering, I said, "You mean like a bullhorn, right?''
"Yes, mom, what other horny would there be?"

Phew, we're still safe, but that's one messed up-would have been pretty cake!

June 9, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterGiftsfromGod

Heeeyyy!
I would TOTALLY use the last cake at MY WEDDING. :(
Tye Die is SO rad.

June 10, 2009 | Unregistered Commenteremileeā™„

I must admit, I love the last cake. I am a sucker for color.

June 10, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCarrietastic

You know, just because some people out there have screwed-up polygamous marriages doesn't mean some of us out here don't have awesome, egalitarian, queer polyamorous marriages that totally rock the house.

I suppose that's a little overly complicated for the person who made the "life on the compound" comment. Since, you know, all those people not like you are exactly the same as each other.

I've been with my partners for five years. We have multiple college degrees, are very independent-minded people and live quite happily together. I wish I could trust the world enough to use my blogger account in making this comment, since it has my real legal name attached to it.

June 13, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I love the Beanie Baby cake! It's pretty!

I thought the Red behemoth might be for the Chinese acrobats.

Too bad the "hive" looks like poo.

June 30, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I just have to chime in on the shark fin cake. One word: tampons!

That is all.

August 3, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJedi Knight Ivyan

Polygamyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!

October 15, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDarth Artemis

I love the Beanie Babies cake, but the "alien armada" one is so flutin' garish!

April 21, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterwhizkidforte

must.steal.beanie.baby.quote. <3

May 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Am I the only person who thinks that the "eaves dropping" cake might be a metaphor for the wedding night?

May 6, 2010 | Unregistered Commenter@CaseyCannolis

I think the beanie baby cake looks cool!

May 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I think the first cake must have been "Alice in Wonderland" inspired.

June 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Im a hippie retro girl,so I REALLY dug that colorful cake!Im a cake dec and I do airbrush some of my cakes like that.

December 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterHippychickD

My brother in law had a skull wearing a top hat on his wedding cake... yeah, good way to start your marriage.

carrie f.

February 18, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCarrie Berry

Well that one with three brides can be Muslim wedding cake ? Just an idea I guess ( they are allowed 3 wifes you know )

February 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAlya

Judy said...

The third one I'm guessing is a wedding in salt lake city hmmmmm?

Lol Great My idea but closer to home I forgot about those great folks with many wifes as well :D

February 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAlya

I'd suggest that those making cracks about Mormons and polygamy try getting correct current info. As a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, based in Salt Lake City, UT, I can definitely state that we haven't practiced plural marriage since God withdrew authorization for that practice in 1890. These days, you get excommunicated for that.

Can't speak for the offshoots that have formed new churches of their own rather than accept that withdrawal of Divine permission for polygamy.

March 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterFelixAndAva

Honestly, I really like the first cake.

The second cake makes me want to cry... and hide my tongue from the extremely bitter frosting...

I like the third cake. I am not into polygamy, myself... however the comment about all the polygamists living in a compound honestly just makes me shake my head in disbelief about how uneducated people are about lifestyles any different from their own. Just because someone is different from you, doesn't mean you need to chastise them for it... =/ Many polygamists in the US are very educated, strongly-willed people. Just because some polygamists have messed up, doesn't mean they all do. Plenty of other religious beliefs have gone HORRIBLY WRONG in certain situations... other Christian beliefs... Muslim beliefs... etc, the list goes on. Not just Polygamy.
Anyway, the cake is very well done. It's not a wreck at all in my opinion... in any sense. Wreckfail... imho. Nice concept and beautifully constructed.

As for the fourth cake... it's definitely frosted... there's no seams and it's smeared at the bottom, as the other people said... it's probably frosted and covered with some sort of crumbly stuff... (wow technical terms here!) It looks really yummy to me :)

I actually like the fifth cake, but I think that's just because I have Synesthesia >___>;;;

March 5, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJohnna

Are you guys all zonked out blind? The beehive cake IS frosted- look at the bottom edge of the bottom layer. It has been frosted and then had cocoa powder thickly dusted on it. Geez!!

June 30, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I love the beehive cake! And it's got to be frosted to hide the cake seams, right? Though I am required to make icing-less cakes in our house all the time. I know, sounds weird, naked bundt cakes and bald cupcakes... but it's certainly less trouble and less calories!

July 21, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Is the beehive cake a honey cake? I'm not 100% certain you 'ice' those...maybe a little glaze, probably some sort of icing or frosting between layers, but not on top, per say. Of course, it might depend on the tradition, recipe, et cetera.

September 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJulie

I think the "uniced" one is supposed to be a beehive... notice all the bees and butterflies swarming around it and the opening for ... bees to enter...
Also, anyone who orders that last cake is NOT OLD ENOUGH TO BE GETTING MARRIED.

January 30, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterElizabeth

The multiple brides cake and one groom? Check out the TV show "Sister Wives".

January 30, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterMarni S.

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